How are you feeling?

[Shyangel]

Lazy. I'm sick of being lazy, yet I can't even motivate myself to do anything but sit on the computer and play games.

Story if my life!

I'm always complaining about how I have nothing to do, but as soon as there is something to do I say," Naw, I just want to chill." So, I've taken away my complaining rights.

 

[Phoenixx]

Well, why don't you do what I do in times like this? I usually pop in some music and do the work, so I'm enjoying some free time and working. Or I just work somewhat and take a break in intervals. Don't let your procrastination get you in trouble, okay? Or Deadman can bring a match and light a fire under you! Does that sound good?

^ Yeah I normally do that, but I haven't procrastinated like this in a while. I think I'll just let it slide... And then possibly regret it later.

 

[Phoenixx]

Story if my life!

I'm always complaining about how I have nothing to do, but as soon as there is something to do I say," Naw, I just want to chill." So, I've taken away from complaining rights.

^ Exactly. You can never win either way.

 

[Shyangel]

mush-brained, a mental mudcake. anxiety = cannot think clearly; cannot decide; cannot take action. problems worsen, anxiety
increases

I agree with you all to much, sadly. These horrible things ruin our lives. Why are we so lucky to be blest with these wining characteristics...

But keep your chin up, and always hope for the best, because it really is attainable.

 

[Invisibleman]

This is not where I imagined myself in life.The future me I envisioned as a young ambitious child never came to life.I envisioned myself as a young man working towards a specific goal in mind,ready to enter the real world and put forth and unleash my mental prowess.

Unfortunetely that was just a silly vision as I am here today as a worthless,meek little clueless child. The confidence and might that I once wielded has been sucked dry with only few drops left. The sun seems to be setting on the once bright future that I once gazed at with exuberant eyes. I try to stay positive and carry on but im so weary, I think about giving up.

Ive never prayed in my life,that changed a few nights ago when I prayed for any sort of inspiration in any shape or form to come my way.

 

[coyote]

This is not where I imagined myself in life.The future me I envisioned as a young ambitious child never came to life.I envisioned myself as a young man working towards a specific goal in mind,ready to enter the real world and put forth and unleash my mental prowess.

Unfortunetely that was just a silly vision as I am here today as a worthless,meek little clueless child. The confidence and might that I once wielded has been sucked dry with only few drops left. The sun seems to be setting on the once bright future that I once gazed at with exuberant eyes. I try to stay positive and carry on but im so weary, I think about giving up.

dude, you're just starting out

more things are going to change

that's the only one constant thing in life

we all have visions of what we think is "supposed" to happen

realizing that the reality of life and our dreams are different doesn't mean that you have to give up - it just means you have to find a different path

it's part of growing up

you're going to be just fine

you're obviously very bright and sensitive - you'll find your way

 

[DeadmanWalking]

This is not where I imagined myself in life.The future me I envisioned as a young ambitious child never came to life.I envisioned myself as a young man working towards a specific goal in mind,ready to enter the real world and put forth and unleash my mental prowess.

Unfortunetely that was just a silly vision as I am here today as a worthless,meek little clueless child. The confidence and might that I once wielded has been sucked dry with only few drops left. The sun seems to be setting on the once bright future that I once gazed at with exuberant eyes. I try to stay positive and carry on but im so weary, I think about giving up.

You can't give up Invisibleman. Take a break if you need to. Rest up and get back that vigor and ambition, then step back into the ring. Come on, stand up. We'll help you as much as you can. The thing about the Sun is that, no matter how many times it falls, it always comes back up.

 

[Invisibleman]

Its just ive been thinking about my future lately and ive been having so much self doubt. I keep thinking to myself "why bother?". I wonder if il ever have confidence. I cant stop imagining myself as a failure. Much of it stems from my successful sister putting me down.

Since we were kids she had always told me that I was never going to move out with mom, that I was retarded (Referring to my anxiety) , and that I was a freak who was stupid,that I would never be independent and that i could never handle university. After being told this for 17 years my self fulfilling prophecy has long set in. My mind keeps running "you know what,maybe shes right.I will be a failure" I had a nightmare that i was 40 working at a gas station while my sister was winning a nobel peace prize. I jolted up and I sobbed into my pillow.

My parents have long since stopped caring about me too,they only care about my sister. They couldnt care less where I end up,they will always have their prized daughter.

 

[coyote]

...My parents have long since stopped caring about me too,they only care about my sister. They couldnt care less where I end up,they will always have their prized daughter.

i often feel the same way about my successful older brother and sister

at some point you have to stop caring about what other people are doing

stop caring about what rewards they are reaping and how they are thought of

and start doing things for yourself

not for your parents

just for you

because that's what YOU want

 

[DeadmanWalking]

Its just ive been thinking about my future lately and ive been having so much self doubt. I keep thinking to myself "why bother?". I wonder if il ever have confidence. I cant stop imagining myself as a failure. Much of it stems from my successful sister putting me down.

Since we were kids she had always told me that I was never going to move out with mom, that I was retarded (Referring to my anxiety) , and that I was a freak who was stupid,that I would never be independent and that i could never handle university. After being told this for 17 years my self fulfilling prophecy has long set in. My mind keeps running "you know what,maybe shes right.I will be a failure" I had a nightmare that i was 40 working at a gas station while my sister was winning a nobel peace prize. I jolted up and I sobbed into my pillow.

My parents have long since stopped caring about me too,they only care about my sister. They couldnt care less where I end up,they will always have their prized daughter.

Don't you think it's time to make them see you? Stand before them and show them that you're a person and that they need to knock it off. You can go tell your sister to go jump off a cliff. Become successful so that you can laugh in their faces every time you see them. What your sister said about you isn't true at all; you've gotta be assertive now and fight back. When anyone tells you stuff like that, shake it off or come up with a witty remark about them (if you're a revenge-type like me). Another alternative is to ignore what they are saying to you and to find people who will push you forward, not kick you back. Either way, you need to stop listening to them because they aren't helping you.

And don't worry that far into the future. For right now, deal with the problems right before you. Everything else will fall into place. The future isn't set in stone and can change in radical and unexpected ways at any given time. So, don't give up, okay?

 

[MikeyC]

Lazy. I'm sick of being lazy, yet I can't even motivate myself to do anything but sit on the computer and play games.

You better not stop playing! I've just started with you....

Its just ive been thinking about my future lately and ive been having so much self doubt. I keep thinking to myself "why bother?". I wonder if il ever have confidence. I cant stop imagining myself as a failure. Much of it stems from my successful sister putting me down.

Since we were kids she had always told me that I was never going to move out with mom, that I was retarded (Referring to my anxiety) , and that I was a freak who was stupid,that I would never be independent and that i could never handle university. After being told this for 17 years my self fulfilling prophecy has long set in. My mind keeps running "you know what,maybe shes right.I will be a failure" I had a nightmare that i was 40 working at a gas station while my sister was winning a nobel peace prize. I jolted up and I sobbed into my pillow.

My parents have long since stopped caring about me too,they only care about my sister. They couldnt care less where I end up,they will always have their prized daughter.

You really need to confront your sister. The way you seem to feel is that there's unresolved issues with her and you really need to talk them out with her directly. She has mentally scarred you and it's not healthy.

I can kind of relate, though. While my parents love me, my younger brother will be the brains of this family soon, and they know it.

 

[Invisibleman]

B ut thats the thing I honestly have nobody in my corner at this point,my parents dont really care about me. I know what you are saying but its so hard to fight back. Again it comes from my sister.

I hate admitting it to myself but I have always felt such jealousy towards my older sister. Since she was born shes always been the most extroverted of extroverts. She was always chatty and wanting to be the life of the party. I would stand alone on the playground watching as people clambered wanting to talk to her and be her friend.

She was academically gifted at a young age,I would sit awkwardly as my parents would discuss my sister with other parents like she was an only child and talked like I never existed. I would get a pat on the head for my report card while my sister would get unprecedented praise,money,and other gifts.

By the time I got to highschool my sister was one of the popular girls,our phone would be ringing off the hook with people looking for her and she was always going out to parties while I stayed home in my room. . Nobody even knew my name and even if they did it was "oh you're Claire's (not sisters real name,just example) brother" even the f**kin teachers called me "claire's brother".

My sister then graduated highschool with top honours and now shes in engineering at one of the top universities in Canada. She already has top marks, her life is basically set in stone at this point,few things could go wrong for her at this point.

The favoring that my parents demonstrated was now even more emphasized. Back before her success I sensed my parents had a lick of caution,I mean we were both wildcards at that point with no indication where we would end up. When she got into engineering I could see the way they
changed and focused on her completely.

More and more the accomplishments of other parents children were demolished as my parents bragged to no end about their prized daughter. Soon the only talk in my household was of what my sister was doing,how she was, feeling,and what she was thinking. The few times I could actually get a word in it was quickly stifled by my sisters constant phone and skype calls. My parents demeanor would change from a dry and drab one in my prescence to a bright exuberant one everytime she called. Anytime I want to talk to my mom about univeristy its like "so mom,I was thinking abou-" WE'LL TALK IN A DAMN MINUTE IM IN THE MIDDLE OF TALKING TO YOUR SISTER! now what were you saying *insert sisters name*.

My sister has set the bar to a height that I could never reach if I tried,I just want to make my parents proud but knowing that they will never be as proud of me as they are of my sister makes me question the point in trying,il never be more than second place

 

[coyote]

^poor Claire

all the expectations

all the demands

everything she has to live up to

and you are free to do whatever you want with your life

she must envy you

 

[MikeyC]

Invisibleman, maybe you should talk to your parents about feeling neglected, then? It really sounds like you're really envious of your sister and sad that your parents heap praise on her. I still suggest talking to your family. I don't know what it will accomplish but it'll give you less weight on your shoulders than you seem to be carrying right now.

 

[DeadmanWalking]

B ut thats the thing I honestly have nobody in my corner at this point,my parents dont really care about me. I know what you are saying but its so hard to fight back. Again it comes from my sister.

I hate admitting it to myself but I have always felt such jealousy towards my older sister. Since she was born shes always been the most extroverted of extroverts. She was always chatty and wanting to be the life of the party. I would stand alone on the playground watching as people clambered wanting to talk to her and be her friend.

She was academically gifted at a young age,I would sit awkwardly as my parents would discuss my sister with other parents like she was an only child and talked like I never existed. I would get a pat on the head for my report card while my sister would get unprecedented praise,money,and other gifts.

By the time I got to highschool my sister was one of the popular girls,our phone would be ringing off the hook with people looking for her and she was always going out to parties while I stayed home in my room. . Nobody even knew my name and even if they did it was "oh you're Claire's (not sisters real name,just example) brother" even the f**kin teachers called me "claire's brother".

My sister then graduated highschool with top honours and now shes in engineering at one of the top universities in Canada. She already has top marks, her life is basically set in stone at this point,few things could go wrong for her at this point.

The favoring that my parents demonstrated was now even more emphasized. Back before her success I sensed my parents had a lick of caution,I mean we were both wildcards at that point with no indication where we would end up. When she got into engineering I could see the way they
changed and focused on her completely.

More and more the accomplishments of other parents children were demolished as my parents bragged to no end about their prized daughter. Soon the only talk in my household was of what my sister was doing,how she was, feeling,and what she was thinking. The few times I could actually get a word in it was quickly stifled by my sisters constant phone and skype calls. My parents demeanor would change from a dry and drab one in my prescence to a bright exuberant one everytime she called. Anytime I want to talk to my mom about univeristy its like "so mom,I was thinking abou-" WE'LL TALK IN A DAMN MINUTE IM IN THE MIDDLE OF TALKING TO YOUR SISTER! now what were you saying *insert sisters name*.

My sister has set the bar to a height that I could never reach if I tried,I just want to make my parents proud but knowing that they will never be as proud of me as they are of my sister makes me question the point in trying,il never be more than second place

You do have people in your corner: us! You have people from all over the world that want to see you make it!

That phone incident? You handled it far better than I. I probably would've grabbed the phone, broke it, and told them, "No, we're having a conversation. Now." I think everything comes down to force here. You're going to have to fight through this aggressively and get that future you desired with your own hands. Don't try to reach your sister's bar, reach your own. You two are different people, with different mindsets, and different abilities/capabilities. You've got a talent, so sharpen that. If I remember right, you like acting, yes? Then work on your acting skills and shoot for becoming one. You can do it! I know you can and so do the rest of us!

And do be sure to follow Mikey's advice as well, okay?

 

[Invisibleman]

You do have people in your corner: us! You have people from all over the world that want to see you make it!

That phone incident? You handled it far better than I. I probably would've grabbed the phone, broke it, and told them, "No, we're having a conversation. Now." I think everything comes down to force here. You're going to have to fight through this aggressively and get that future you desired with your own hands. Don't try to reach your sister's bar, reach your own. You two are different people, with different mindsets, and different abilities/capabilities. You've got a talent, so sharpen that. If I remember right, you like acting, yes? Then work on your acting skills and shoot for becoming one. You can do it! I know you can and so do the rest of us!

And do be sure to follow Mikey's advice as well, okay?

I told my parents to tell her to stop putting me down because I dont like it.I told my sister about how the hurtful things she said has affected me, she replied with the most careless "oops". How I still love her is incredible.

But no it wasnt me that said I like acting,you're thinking of somebody else:: Anyway ive hijacked this thread il shutup now,ive been crying for the past 20 minutes and I feel better now. Ive never told anybody this before,ive bottled it up for so long so it feels so good to let out.

 

[MikeyC]

I told my parents to tell her to stop putting me down because I dont like it.I told my sister about how the hurtful things she said has affected me, she replied with the most careless "oops". How I still love her is incredible.

But no it wasnt me that said I like acting,you're thinking of somebody else:: Anyway ive hijacked this thread il shutup now,ive been crying for the past 20 minutes and I feel better now.

Ah, yet you still love her. That's incredible. Your love supersedes everything she's done to you. That could be even more reason to talk to her again.

You haven't hijacked anything, mate. We just hope you feel better and try to resolve this.

 

[1BlackSheep]

^poor Claire

all the expectations

all the demands

everything she has to live up to

and you are free to do whatever you want with your life

she must envy you

This is very true! Between my sister and I, it was me who was expected to "go places" in life. My parents always held me to a higher standard. It was ok for her not to finish college. It was ok for her to work a minimum wage job. I always envied my sister for not having all that pressure put on her. And, even though I've had some career success, I'm still the "black sheep" because I'm not married and don't have children. It kind of sucks!

 

[DeadmanWalking]

This is very true! Between my sister and I, it was me who was expected to "go places" in life. My parents always held me to a higher standard. It was ok for her not to finish college. It was ok for her to work a minimum wage job. I always envied my sister for not having all that pressure put on her. And, even though I've had some career success, I'm still the "black sheep" because I'm not married and don't have children. It kind of sucks!

You know, I'm willing to help with your problem a bit!

 

[1BlackSheep]

You know, I'm willing to help with your problem a bit!

Hmmmm, Mrs. Deadman! I like it!