How are you feeling?

uncle

Active member
Made a fool of myself at work yesterday in front of about 20 co-workers who will undoubtably tell many of my other co workers who were not there. So right now I'm on my second sleepless night. I am deeply ashamed of my incompatense.

Today my mother who spent her life lecturing me on how I should live my life stuck her nose into my business with someone else and I feel humiliated.

I have only my two children that keep me from drinking and drugging myself to death.

So to sum it up.......Shame, anger and self hate
 

Patrick26

Well-known member
What a night! worked 9AM to 3PM, then headed over to my buddies house and we took the bus to downtown for him to get a slurpee. Came back and watched UFC with one of my co workers, his new girl he is hanging out with, one of his buddies i like hanging out with. So 5 of us total, i order 3 pizzas for us for dinner. After UFC we were taking turns on the 360 playing Call of Duty Black Ops, i sucked because i never play with a controller as i am a PC guy. The whole time we were bull****ting and laughing and having a good time. We head out because my buddy is meeting his GF downtown, one of the guys needs money so my buddy gives him money from the bank and we missed our bus because of this. We wait half an hour for the next bus, so we just talk about things while waiting then get on the bus, the back is full of young guys who all know my buddys friend who i like hanging out with. The drunk girls are singing O Canada...they are all HOTTTT!!!!! and the normal guys you see around hot girls. Anyway one pounds his fist on mine as he walks by, i dunno what he was talking about though so i just nodded and said "yeah" and smiled. Anyway then my buddy got off, and i was talking out loud infront of everyone to my buddy on the bus till he got off, so a good 10 mins. Also talked to a random dude who was talking to us. Eveeryone is staring but meh, i didn't care. Anyway i got off at my stop and here i am now. That's what will happen all the time when i move in with my buddy i hope and i can finally get rid of my SA.
 
OK so I just went outside to smoke. Everyone was in the house, and I heard the gate open, thinking it was some random guy, I jumped up scared as ****, trying to debate whether I should run or try to fight him. So I yelled "WHO THE **** ARE YOU".

It was my brother,, he decided to go out the front door and through the gate to get to the back yard, instead of going out the back door.

I am very blind, can only have 23/25 vision with contacts and it was dark outside.

now I can't sleep
 

Graeme1988

Hie yer hence from me heath!
Trying to fight that overwhelming feeling of self-loathing I get when I'm feeling depressed. My mind is just a mess right now with unarticulated thoughts, and feeling, and unresolved issues, mostly to do with my relationship (or lack thereof) with my father.

Also, really frustrated and angry at how unsupportive and ignorant my family are when it comes to dealing with my depression and social anxiety.
 

dean01

Well-known member
friging, fookin, c**tin, bas*ering mmmmmm!! having a darstedly and multley moment argh bloody relatives!!!
 

caringsoul

Banned
today i was feeling quite nice, i was out with my mum and some aunty's buying flowers, one of the aunty mentioned something to me and it brought a feeling of a particular joy to me, and i realise that i still have hope. then later i was thinking about something and was getting upset again.
 
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