What was getting therapy like for you?

Satori_lotus · Oct 27, 2013

Hi,

I was just wondering is there anyone else out there who has social anxiety and is getting help for it/has had therapy before, and if so how are you finding it?
I'm asking because I've been to see counsellors and a CBT therapist before and am going to start it again soon. I found that it didn't help that much when I was seeing a therapist, it was only after I had stopped, my depression/anxiety sort of improved on its own through time and I was able to see my therapist actually made a lot of sense. For instance, I always tried to work out why I had SA but wondering this never really gave me an answer but simply made me suffer more. The advice my therapist gave me was just to let go of the past which did relieve a portion of my stress.
Anyway just wanted to know what your experience was like with it and what kind of tips/exercises helped the most with you?

If anyone feels like sharing that is

socialorphan · Oct 27, 2013

I didn't spend a lot of time in therapy. Never really helped me. I think the biggest reason was I didn't put the effort into it, it's like anything else you get out what you put into it, it's not as easy as just talking to someone for an hour a week. That was my experience, I'm sure others have had different.

MikeyC · Oct 27, 2013

I'm going to therapy once a month due to budget and because my problems are mild in comparison. It took a while for therapy to start working, but it all depends on how much you invest in it. You have to be truthful, and you have to listen and understand what your therapist is telling you. You have to follow what they say. It's not easy and it does take some getting used to, but if you're willing and able, you can do it.

mismeek · Oct 27, 2013

I agree with Mikey.. you have to WANT to be in therapy.. they arent going to give you a magic pill to make your issues go away. They are solely there to help give you insight to whats going inside your head. YOU have to do the work and have the motivation to get better.

I did therapy and CBT for 6 years.. i did have to switch therapist for a while until i found one that i felt comfortable with, but it has improved my agoraphobia and my social anxiety immensely!

dottie · Oct 27, 2013

^ what they said ^

i would also add to this that i think some therapists are better than others. some of them like to listen to you talk for an hour and collect a check. these are con artists. they will do this for years, as long as you let them. a good therapist will set limits in the beginning and let you know that the point is not to be in therapy forever. it's about bringing you to a level where you can cope on your own. that is how you know they are legit and will get down to business... but again, it all comes down to you in the end and what you put into it. good luck!!

nicole1 · Oct 27, 2013

I felt like it was unproductive. I felt like it was such a part of who I am that it was hard to breakthrough it.

Kiwong · Oct 28, 2013

Good and bad, depending on which therapist I saw.

Mindfullness, meditation, relaxation and breathing techniques, changing my diet. They were the most useful things I did.

Satori_lotus · Oct 28, 2013

Thanks for the insight guys

and I really agree with what people said, that you have to WANT to get therapy - it takes 2 to achieve any sort of improvement.

Luckily, I've referred myself to Steps to Well being, I don't know if anyone's tried them before but the therapists there seem to want to get down to business and truly help.

It's definitely difficult to separate SA from who you are, but ultimately it isn't who you are - I think that's very important though, to understand that you are you and SA is the illness.
It's going to be challenge breaking down all the walls and being honest, especially if its with a stranger. How do you deal with talking about all these things that you wouldn't normally talk about with anyone else?

Nooms · Oct 28, 2013

I also visited a therapist for a while, but learned that it did not help as much as I had hoped. I did put a lot of effort into it, but I just felt like I was too stubborn to follow her advise. The therapist was all about changing my mindset, which for some may work, but I had a really hard time with this.

On another note though, it was good to have someone to talk to who at least understands the problem better. In that way she was really helpful, and because of her I dared to talk more about my issues with family members. And now, since I have the support of both my mother and brother, I feel like they help me better than a therapist would.

Satori_lotus · Oct 28, 2013

I can relate to that completely! Even though my therapist gave me a lot of sound and logical advice, I was too stubborn and trapped in my way of thinking to really listen to what she said.

Anyway, glad going to see her had a positive outcome for you

Nooms · Oct 28, 2013

I hope that when you do start a new series of sessions with a therapist that it'll work out well for you this time

Just make sure to put a lot of effort into it.

Also, forgot to mention the kind of tips and exercises I got. Already said that I did not get too much out of it, but the therapist did give me some tips to relax mostly (she even did the thing where you have to pretend you're somewhere else, in a comfortable place, and you have to take notice of your surroundings, take notice of your senses, that sort of thing) and she gave me this table with 5 steps for ****ysing a problem. Which actually helps with the whole different mindset thing. Though, when I'm actually freaking out about something, I don't think "oh let's fill out this table".

Oh well, every therapist has his/her own tips and tricks, and I hope you'll learn some good ones

Flanscho · Oct 28, 2013

I was twice in therapy. The first one didn't last long. The second one about a year. It was mostly about chronic despressions though. But after a year I had the feeling that the guy couldn't help me much and I was improving anyway, and so I quit it.

Satori_lotus · Oct 29, 2013

Oh the filling out the table thing sounds quite familiar, I guess it can be helpful if you're sitting down and doing it.
And thank you, I'll try my best in it

And the therapist is only there to help guide you so if you're able to change your mindset on your own then that's great

A86 · Nov 2, 2013

my 2 cents on therapy, my words are not Gospel, just my opinions and experience...

I am so glad I went to see someone. no regrets at all. they helped me better understand myself and my emotions. very insightful.

however where it fell apart for me was the things to make me "better". the cbt. I now understood where they were coming from and the logic behind the direction they were taking... but it all seemed a little forced.

I did take away the methods though to apply to people who's opinion who mattered more to me than some dude I only saw an hour a week.

long story short I was better off doing this with friends and family. still needed the perfessional insight to for direction though.

goblin · Jan 27, 2014

Awkward and ineffective. If I went back now I might get better results, but I'm doing well enough on my own that I don't want to put in the work to find a good one.

Kiwong · Jan 27, 2014

There was one session of meditation that I did that was really, really great. I felt so relaxed it was wonderful. It lasted for days.

nothingmuch · Feb 8, 2014

Last time I saw a therapist was over a year ago. I went every month for almost a year to deal with a specific problem I had dealing with a family member. Eventually I told her about some things and she decided I had experienced psychosis. It seemed like she became overbearing and a little bit condescending, so I quit going. Maybe she was sick of seeing me.

I've been trying to meditate, and I think that helps me accept who I am. I would like to a take a class, because I'm new to meditation. It's hard for me to even manage 5 minutes.

Silatuyok · Feb 8, 2014

I don't like talk therapy, it is terribly awkward and uncomfortable for me. However, it does always tend to help somewhat.

edwardcejka · Jul 30, 2014

Therapy can be an effective treatment for mental and emotional problems.

PugofCrydee · Jul 30, 2014

Not all therapist's are the same. Just like say, mechanics, some are better than others.
If you try one therapist and it doesn't seem to feel right, try to find another.
I was lucky to find my current psychologist who is terrific. And yes, it's helping me.

But I agree with others who have said you have to want to recover. Also be aware that not everything your mental health professional will try to help you with will work.

This is important.
Therapy takes time, there are a lot of tools and methods to use/try.
In a year, you may try 10 different things with your therapist, but only 3 may work, or give you some benefit. While that sounds like small gains, that could add up to a 30% improvement. I'd take that any day.

What ever you do, don't give up.

What was getting therapy like for you?

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