You can't love someone else until you love yourself

[SilentBird]

I think this is a black and white statement. I am more inclined to think: it is easier to love someone else the more you love yourself.

Everyone has doubts and insecurities.

Other people's thoughts?

 

[MollyBeGood]

I think this is a black and white statement. I am more inclined to think: it is easier to love someone else the more you love yourself.

Everyone has doubts and insecurities.

Other people's thoughts?

I agree with you. Nobody completely loves themselves.. unless they are ultra egotistical, those types are not capable of a real loving relationship with another person.

it helps to not be too down on yourself, others pick up on it and are likely not to be attracted to you.

It's a healthy balance, really not black and white like you said

 

[Lea]

That´s utter crap, I mean the OP´s post. Of course you can love others if you don´t love yourself, but they won´t love you back as April Snow points out.

 

[SilentBird]

This makes me wonder what is the connection of love and need?

 

[Lea]

This makes me wonder what is the connection of love and need?

None. You can genuinely love others even if you don´t like yourself that much, but that doesn´t mean you love them because you need them. I was never that cheap to settle with people just because I NEED them. Every friendship or relationship besides is work and you have to give as well as get, so you don´t get anything for free, unless you use the person.

 

[Kiwong]

A few weeks ago, I had to leave my pet cockatiel at a unfamiliar pet minding place, while I went on holidays.

I was worried I might not see her again, I worried about her escaping and flying away, I suddenly realised how attached to her I was.

I tried to fight back those feeling of worry and grief. Then I realised it was love. Love is feeling for another living thing that you can't stop even though you might try to.

I don't really love myself, but I do love my pet bird. It is 8 years of attachment to the closest living thing to me.

 

[The Lost]

I'm loved by a few people, never have I once loved myself. I think it's just in the case of giving off enough confidence, which requires some level of self-love.

 

[SilentBird]

None. You can genuinely love others even if you don´t like yourself that much, but that doesn´t mean you love them because you need them. I was never that cheap to settle with people just because I NEED them. Every friendship or relationship besides is work and you have to give as well as get, so you don´t get anything for free, unless you use the person.

That's a discerning assessment.

 

[Yarrow]

I think it's hard to have healthy give and take relationships with others if you don't have any self-love or self-respect. Not sure about love, the emotion.

 

[Kiwong]

Having thought some more about this, I think I can love, the problem is believing I deserve or will attract the love of anyone else.

 

[SilentBird]

I think I can love, the problem is believing I deserve or will attract the love of anyone else.

Me too. I find it easier to believe that I won't attract anyone, to save me from getting hurt, or getting my hopes up.

 

[ImNotMyIllness]

I know you can love someone else and not love yourself. I loved women, family, friends-all without loving myself. That being said, if you don't love yourself, you can easily be taken advantage of and hurt-something I know all too well!

 

[AGR]

Bull****,its too much of a black and white statement,in real life it never works that way.

 

[SilentBird]

That being said, if you don't love yourself, you can easily be taken advantage of and hurt-something I know all too well!

I've had that happen. I am determined it will not happen again. I'd rather be alone.

 

[ImNotMyIllness]

I've had that happen. I am determined it will not happen again. I'd rather be alone.

I'm determined too....I think too determined. I've pushed away a lot of women because I was afraid of getting hurt or rejected. It's a slippery slope.

I just can't seem to get anything right.:sad:

 

[MikeyC]

I've had that happen. I am determined it will not happen again. I'd rather be alone.

I'm determined too....I think too determined. I've pushed away a lot of women because I was afraid of getting hurt or rejected. It's a slippery slope.

I just can't seem to get anything right.:sad:

I had my heart broken in 2008 and I said I was determined never to let that happen again. If I maintained that, I would've never had my ex or found Fiona today. Being hurt sucks but having someone into you is a wonderful feeling.

 

[ImNotMyIllness]

I had my heart broken in 2008 and I said I was determined never to let that happen again. If I maintained that, I would've never had my ex or found Fiona today. Being hurt sucks but having someone into you is a wonderful feeling.

:thumbup: Very true! Well said!!

 

[SilentBird]

Ever Fallen in Love (With Someone You Shouldn't've)

BUZZCOCKS - Ever Fallen In Love (1978 Top Of The Pops UK TV Appearance) ~ HIGH QUALITY HQ ~ - YouTube

 

[Lea]

That's a discerning assessment.

Yea. To put it even better, it is indeed possible to love people without them loving you back or reciprocating in any way, you might not NEED them, you can live without them but it won´t make you happy.

We are social creatures, life is interaction, communication, sharing and creating bonds with other people. If we get ignored or don´t get any reciprocation from people, it makes us feel isolated and unhappy.

I think nobody likes the feeling of being hated or unloved, why should we pretend to like it? I think it´s perfectly human, unless we start bothering people because of it.

 

[laure15]

Bull****,its too much of a black and white statement,in real life it never works that way.

You may be right. Some people don't love themselves but they love their children so much that they are willing to sacrifice their lives for their children. And there are also people who love God so much that they follow the Bible to the T, losing their sense of self in the process.