Wow, amazing, atleast i know Im not alone. The burden of being "different", that silent one in a group, you got the words but you just can't seem to express them, maybe making people laugh... IN YOUR HEAD... while that is true, i really want to talk, light up the rooms i walk in, why must it be so difficult? Ive read news papers thinking maybe my vocabulary sucks, I've watched sitcoms, did everything I could, but it ain't working. And strange thing, this personality was not around 7 years back, i used to be a good public speaker, talkative and crazy, had influence in high school, then suddenly i watched it all fall apart, drawn to myself, low self-esteem, i hardly have friend around my neighbourhood, sometimes, now its so often, i think people look at me funny, some just get bored of greeting me, because that's all I do; now they just ignore me, at times i feel like Im getting paranoid, paranoid in that the pattern is of ignoring me is evident in most people in my neighbourhood, its painful:'(