When even marriage makes you social phobic

[Opaline]

I totally get it. :thumbup: I tried cutting way back on caffeine (hugely important), getting enough sleep, and making sure I get enough alone time. In the end, I ended up getting on a low dose of Prozac, which takes the final edge off my anxiety and makes me a very pleasant person to be around.

It took me a long time to realize that it was anxiety causing my problems, not my partner and not my seemingly inherently flawed personality. Once I could recognize it for what it is (F*CKING ANXIETY!) I was much relieved and felt the guilt lift from my shoulders. I know you are probably a really wonderful person and a great wife, but you have this anxiety problem that you need to learn to cope with. Don't ever let someone tell you it's not a serious problem, because it is.

Is it anxiety problems? I think I've heard that before; because you're so wound up all the time and tense, the smallest things bother you, sort of like when you're on high alert in a scary situation and the tiniest sound or movement freaks you out. Maybe. It makes a lot of sense.

 

[Hoppy]

Thank you, now I know what it is called.

People eating apples drive me nuts. I will leave the room rather than listen to it.

 

[LazyHermitCrab]

For me it's if someone sneezes. It feels awkward not knowing if it's okay not to say anything because I don't want to say anything... My parents brought me up to say "bless you, thank you" each and every time. That's why it annoys me today. Also I have trouble being on the computer next to someone on the computer too, because the typing seems off rhythm. Anyway, maybe you could tell him to use a water dispenser filter, so it would just pour into the cup.

 

[coyote]

spouses...

you can't live with them

you can't bury them in the back yard

 

[MollyBeGood]

spouses...

you can't live with them

you can't bury them in the back yard

Wait... you can-

I watch alot of true crime shows, people do it all the time. There's some on- going murder investigation here with a 22 yr old just married couple from Great Falls who pushed her new hubby off the side of a cliff at Glacier Nat. Park on their honeymoon...apparently she didn't want to use a shovel and wanted it done quick!

 

[coyote]

Wait... you can-

I watch alot of true crime shows, people do it all the time. There's some on- going murder investigation here with a 22 yr old just married couple from Great Falls who pushed her new hubby off the side of a cliff at Glacier Nat. Park on their honeymoon...apparently she didn't want to use a shovel and wanted it done quick!

well, after the wedding and honeymoon is over it's all downhill anyway :thumbup:

 

[Feathers]

I've had misophonia/hyperacusis too...

Is it anxiety problems? I think I've heard that before; because you're so wound up all the time and tense, the smallest things bother you, sort of like when you're on high alert in a scary situation and the tiniest sound or movement freaks you out. Maybe. It makes a lot of sense.

Opaline, I think you may be on to something... When one is in danger in the desert (and hungry) hearing small noises can be a difference between life and death...

For me, it partly depends on weather and nutrition too, and sleep, as Kiwong said...

Chatterbox, maybe your husband is trying to get you to embrace the water-drinking habit too? (And hence the loud 'appreciation' of it all?) I thought his trips to the loo would bother you more lol!
Is he doing this to be healthy or is he genuinely thirsty? (A check up for diabetes might be in order if the latter?)

Also, there's a thing such as drinking too much water too, I think someone even died during a water drinking challenge, it was on internet. I'd probably need to drink a bit more tho lol.

 

[susieq]

Irritability is a common symptom of anxiety or depression, and there is usually no reasonable explanation as to why something insignificant can annoy you so much. Maybe that fact that he has made a life change of any kind is annoying especially when he is making an issue of it ( like saying aaahh whenever he has a drink) because there are more important things going on in your life that you would rather he focused on?

 

[jaim38]

Marriage/living together makes me social phobic for many reasons. I have many habits that I prefer to keep private. And, what if I accidentally burp, fart, or have my stomach growl in front of my bf/husband? That's just very embarassing! I'm already having performance anxiety just being by myself, without anyone around. I don't think I can stomach the thought of living with another person intimately.