I'm not sure how to vote on this one. Abused? No. But neglected? Probably.
This is kind of how i feel.Im not sure if it was outright abuse as bad as some people have,but it was definatley neglect and it left me with no self esteem.I think mental abuse gets over looked aswell but it really can cause as much damage as any other type.
Its really hard to describe,because alot of it was so subtle but it did so much damage over time.My Dad was really messed up because of ptsd.He use to go out and get pissed every night,come back and smash the house up,or beat the dog with a snooker cue :
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When i was too young to know any better i really looked up to him and always wanted his like praise and reasurance.But when he wasnt getting drunk at night he would just sit on his arse all day long.Controlling my mum,telling her what she could wear..not letting her have friends.
He use to stand over her cooking and smash stuff up if he didnt like how she did it.I remember one time he threw his dinner against the wall because she had put mushrooms in,then kicked off the next day because she hadnt.We were all just scared of him and it was like walking on egg shells.I did so well at primary school...but when id come home with an A,it didnt seem to matter.Yet when i came home in trouble on the odd occasion,id get called a dick head and that id amount to nothing ect
I pretty much stopped trying when i got to high school which i regret,but at the time i felt like what was the point because no one appreciated it.My Mum was really bad with me aswell..she use to love goading us kids into answering back so she could get us into trouble,really petty stuff and she was so full of spite it was like she enjoyed having the power over us.But shes a lovley person now and i think it was because she was a victim herself.
Anyway im so stopping writing now because this is getting like a book and i could go on and on,its just nice to vent a little.