Peur
Member
I truly hope this is the right forum to be posting this in, if not, I sincerely apologise.
Onto the situation.. (will try to keep it condensed)
Two Sundays ago at a family party, my cousin brought her schoolmate that I haven't seen in a few years. She's twelve, will be thirteen this year, and was *quite* clingy to me throughout the party; She'd say some very provocative things to me when we were in the pool, and when some of us were in my room, she wouldn't let me sit anywhere else but beside her on my oversized chair (lest I get punched somewhere), etc. . Two days later, my cousin was back over because my mother babysits her, and her friend was with her for the week, so she came back too. I slept til 2:30 PM out of utter fear and anxiety from Sunday, heh.. So then, the next day is the big one... I got up around 9 AM, had my food and stuff, and went about my normal online activities, until my cousin and her friend knocked at my door, and I let them in of course (I won't be dishonourable). My mother had to take my cousin's little sister to the doctor, leaving me to watch my cousin and her friend while she was gone, so obviously I was a bit anxious again. Well, they came in, my cousin wanted to use my computer, so I let her, and her friend plopped down in my chair, on the right side, and I went over and sat on the left side, next to her, as had become usual by this time. My mother was gone about 2 hours or a little more, and we all three spent that time talking and laughing, me getting (affectionately) kicked, punched, wet fingers stuck in my ear (lol), and not to mention my right arm getting sucked as to leave three love-bites, haha! (I had, and have, no complaints, she obviously wanted to show her liking for me, as my cousin told me later when just us two were alone for a few minutes). I ended up getting two cheek kisses, as well as her phone number entered into my phone, so she could message me. All of this I obliged to without a qualm, because by now, I had become comfortable with her, and I like her very, very much, and highly respect her.
But now, the problem is that she called me her "boy toy", and we had a picture taken together by my cousin, with her friend pressed up against me, around around my shoulders, and her in a bikini bathing-suit (ever so provocative), and she said if her other "boy toys" saw it, they would be "SO jealous!" - and she seemed very amused at that thought. Keeping to the point here, she also called me her friend on that 3rd day she was over, and I later confirmed this by asking her in a text message the day later. I am now feeling scared because what if she ever talks about her other "boy toys" around me, and I get jealous?... What if she gets bored with me and loses interest? But that would not happen, right, she said I'm her friend. My cousin goes on and on about how very much her friend likes me. I just want to know there is a person I know in real, offline-life that would call me out as a friend...
This dear, lovely girl.. She makes me feel like a person of the world... I've always felt like I'm in my own solitary existence, watching the world go by through a window. But this fair girl, she makes me feel as if she has broken the window, taken me by the hand, and pulled me into the mainstream world, where people have friends, get hugs, feel loved, and are accepted by peers. I'm just scared that she might be so enthralled by me one day, and I'll be forgotten about by her.
P.S. I will be 19 soon, and I know there is a six year age difference and I don't care at *all*! I won't be having sexual encounters with her, so I don't care if she is 12, I don't care a single iota.
Feels good to get that out...
Onto the situation.. (will try to keep it condensed)
Two Sundays ago at a family party, my cousin brought her schoolmate that I haven't seen in a few years. She's twelve, will be thirteen this year, and was *quite* clingy to me throughout the party; She'd say some very provocative things to me when we were in the pool, and when some of us were in my room, she wouldn't let me sit anywhere else but beside her on my oversized chair (lest I get punched somewhere), etc. . Two days later, my cousin was back over because my mother babysits her, and her friend was with her for the week, so she came back too. I slept til 2:30 PM out of utter fear and anxiety from Sunday, heh.. So then, the next day is the big one... I got up around 9 AM, had my food and stuff, and went about my normal online activities, until my cousin and her friend knocked at my door, and I let them in of course (I won't be dishonourable). My mother had to take my cousin's little sister to the doctor, leaving me to watch my cousin and her friend while she was gone, so obviously I was a bit anxious again. Well, they came in, my cousin wanted to use my computer, so I let her, and her friend plopped down in my chair, on the right side, and I went over and sat on the left side, next to her, as had become usual by this time. My mother was gone about 2 hours or a little more, and we all three spent that time talking and laughing, me getting (affectionately) kicked, punched, wet fingers stuck in my ear (lol), and not to mention my right arm getting sucked as to leave three love-bites, haha! (I had, and have, no complaints, she obviously wanted to show her liking for me, as my cousin told me later when just us two were alone for a few minutes). I ended up getting two cheek kisses, as well as her phone number entered into my phone, so she could message me. All of this I obliged to without a qualm, because by now, I had become comfortable with her, and I like her very, very much, and highly respect her.
But now, the problem is that she called me her "boy toy", and we had a picture taken together by my cousin, with her friend pressed up against me, around around my shoulders, and her in a bikini bathing-suit (ever so provocative), and she said if her other "boy toys" saw it, they would be "SO jealous!" - and she seemed very amused at that thought. Keeping to the point here, she also called me her friend on that 3rd day she was over, and I later confirmed this by asking her in a text message the day later. I am now feeling scared because what if she ever talks about her other "boy toys" around me, and I get jealous?... What if she gets bored with me and loses interest? But that would not happen, right, she said I'm her friend. My cousin goes on and on about how very much her friend likes me. I just want to know there is a person I know in real, offline-life that would call me out as a friend...
This dear, lovely girl.. She makes me feel like a person of the world... I've always felt like I'm in my own solitary existence, watching the world go by through a window. But this fair girl, she makes me feel as if she has broken the window, taken me by the hand, and pulled me into the mainstream world, where people have friends, get hugs, feel loved, and are accepted by peers. I'm just scared that she might be so enthralled by me one day, and I'll be forgotten about by her.
P.S. I will be 19 soon, and I know there is a six year age difference and I don't care at *all*! I won't be having sexual encounters with her, so I don't care if she is 12, I don't care a single iota.
Feels good to get that out...
