Post your random thoughts/feelings etc

theslowesthand

theslowesthand

Banned
But it looks good right now.
But i'm just waiting for the hair-pulling to start again. Then i'll have to cut it all off, as it will start looking patchy (bare areas where i've pulled all the beard hairs out) :kickingmyself:
 
theslowesthand

theslowesthand

Banned
A beard suits me
It makes me look better
And it makes me look fitter
But if i get the hair-pulling jitter
I'll have to return to being a hairless critter
 
theoutsider

theoutsider

Well-known member
AtTheGates said:
had a REALLY hard time with a group of 3 inmates today. we were brining them back from lunch and when we tried to get them back in their pod they started arguing with us. for some for reason LOGIC doesnt work with some of these guys. so the argument escalates to the point where I'm being yelled at and cussed at by 3 LARGE inmates .

as a last resort of the argument, I end up saying to one of them "just shut the fvck up and get in your pod!!" really loud and kind of close to his face ..then my partner comes over (he's like 300 pounds) and we settle the probblem , FINALLY getting them into the pod.


about 5min later he tells me that one of them was a high ranking member of The Crips and the other two were ALSO in the crips but at a lower rank.



...holy sh!t...that could have gotten BAD. lol


one of the upsides of this job though is that after iv done it for a while , I'm not going to be afraid of ANYTHING. hopefully social anxiety will be a thing of the past at that point.
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Wow! I can't imagine having a job like that and also having SA. On the other hand, maybe it's quite liberating being able to tell someone to just shut the f**k up. I certainly have come across enough people in my own line of employment that I'd like to yell that to. Unfortunately, when you work in an office, it's unacceptable to say that to a co-worker or manager. :sad:
 
MollyBeGood

MollyBeGood

Well-known member
My days are so ridiculously bi-polar. Wake up mood is good, good news etc...then 5 hrs later the ****ing the world is crashing down..
Not cool.
I will not take complete credit for it/my life being like this either. I do think society is going the way of the dodo bird. Some of us notice, some of us don't.
 
PugofCrydee

PugofCrydee

You want to know how I got these scars?
MollyBeGood said:
My days are so ridiculously bi-polar. Wake up mood is good, good news etc...then 5 hrs later the ****ing the world is crashing down..
Not cool.
I will not take complete credit for it/my life being like this either. I do think society is going the way of the dodo bird. Some of us notice, some of us don't.
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I know how you feel Molly, and I feel the same way about humankind..
 
theslowesthand

theslowesthand

Banned
MollyBeGood said:
My days are so ridiculously bi-polar. Wake up mood is good, good news etc...then 5 hrs later the ****ing the world is crashing down..
Not cool.
I will not take complete credit for it/my life being like this either. I do think society is going the way of the dodo bird. Some of us notice, some of us don't.
Click to expand...

It's certainly no fun having bipolar (from what i gather reading about it). Are you on medication for it?

From your photo you look pretty good - i hadn't occurred to me that you might have sth like that, as you look pretty chilled in the photo. :)
 
AtTheGates

AtTheGates

Banned
theoutsider said:
Wow! I can't imagine having a job like that and also having SA. On the other hand, maybe it's quite liberating being able to tell someone to just shut the f**k up. I certainly have come across enough people in my own line of employment that I'd like to yell that to. Unfortunately, when you work in an office, it's unacceptable to say that to a co-worker or manager. :sad:
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it seems like it WOULD be a bit cathartic but for me personally it just feels awkward/weird . its really against my nature to yell at anyone or be aggressive so I prefer interacting with the inmates who dont give me a hard time about EVERY little thing. but theres MORE than a handful of inmates who really test my patience and I can't stand it.


I need to just write them up the next time it happens and skip all the illogical bantering that they throw at me...some of them seem SO stupid that I think they actually BELIEVE their own bulls!t......

seriously. its like playing chess with a pigeon when dealing with some of those guys .





lastly, having SA doesnt effect me all THAT much on this job because , other than my co-workers, idc what anyone there thinks of me.
 
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MollyBeGood

MollyBeGood

Well-known member
theslowesthand said:
It's certainly no fun having bipolar (from what i gather reading about it). Are you on medication for it?

From your photo you look pretty good - i hadn't occurred to me that you might have sth like that, as you look pretty chilled in the photo. :)
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I am not bipolar, I ment my "days" are that way. Though I sometimes think I might be undiagnosed Rapid Cycle variety..

Ok ty chilled is good :bigsmile:
 
MollyBeGood

MollyBeGood

Well-known member
Off to make something for dinner though I have no desire to make anything at all lately. I hate it when cooking is dreadergy. Maybe I will snap out of it. Probably not. Cutting onions makes me cry on top of it all. Why do I keep choosing things with onions? I do love Mexican food though.
 
theslowesthand

theslowesthand

Banned
MollyBeGood said:
Off to make something for dinner though I have no desire to make anything at all lately. I hate it when cooking is dreadergy. Maybe I will snap out of it. Probably not. Cutting onions makes me cry on top of it all. Why do I keep choosing things with onions? I do love Mexican food though.
Click to expand...

I never cook. I eat from cans (baked beans, spaghetti, chunky soups, casseroles). The only thing i heat/cook (in microwave) is porridge & moffee.

I used to cook potatoes & onions in the microwave. No probs with onions, as i cooked them for a bit whole THEN sliced, so that was a handy side-effect!. In the end i got sick of them sprouting & spoiling while in my house. And also they was a hassle to cook, compared to eating from the can.
 
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PugofCrydee

PugofCrydee

You want to know how I got these scars?
We don't deal with outsiders very well
They say newcomers have a certain smell
You have trust issues, not to mention
They say they can smell your intentions

You'll never know the freakshow sitting next to you
You'll have some weird people sitting next to you
You'll think, "How'd I get here, sitting next to you?"
But after all I've said
Please don't forget
(Watch it, watch it)
 
PugofCrydee

PugofCrydee

You want to know how I got these scars?
If this is to end in fire
Then we should all burn together
Watch the flames climb high into the night
Calling out father, oh, stand by and we will
Watch the flames burn auburn on
The mountain side
And if we should die tonight
Then we should all die together

Raise a glass of wine for the last time
 
PugofCrydee

PugofCrydee

You want to know how I got these scars?
Now I'm walking again
to the beat of a drum
And I'm counting the steps to the door of your heart
Only shadows ahead
barely clearing the roof
Get to know the feeling of liberation and relief

Hey now, Hey now
Don't dream it's over
Hey now, Hey now
When the world comes in
They come, they come
To build a wall between us
You know they won't win
 
PugofCrydee

PugofCrydee

You want to know how I got these scars?
Sometimes I feel like I'm dying at dawn
and sometimes I'm warm as fire
But lately I feel like I'm just gonna rain
and it goes over, and over, and over again, yeah

Too many flames, with too much to burn
and life's only made of paper
Oh, how I need to be free of this pain
but it goes over, and over, and over, and over again

Yeah, sometimes I cry for the lost and alone
and for their dreams that will all be ashes
But lately I feel like I'm just gonna rain
and it goes over, and over, and over, and over again
 
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