one comment which has affected your confidence

RedRibbons

Well-known member
heh heh. a lot of mean things have been said to people, here. It's sad. And it sucks that they stick in our heads.

The worst for me..

"Do you have a problem with your sexuality?" - this guy in high school. I've been questioning my sexuality since then.. and it's no good, cause it started my ocd.
 

Stressball

Well-known member
From my dear mommy, over the years. I can't name just one, they all hurt me, although I've recently gotten over my resentment.

"Why do you look so bad without makeup?"
"Your backside is getting too big, you need to lose weight."
"Your face is so horrible, you've got too much acne!"
"Your face is fine, just maybe your nose." (I was having a shitty day and my self-esteem was at an all time low and I mentioned having plastic surgery.)
"Get outside and exercise, you fat piece of shit." (When I was 14, and wasn't sticking to my diet. I'll never forget this one, and the anger she had with me over how fat I was.)
"You're so cold and unaffectionate."
"Hmmm, I thought someone with your figure shouldn't be wearing stripes."
"You're fine, just need to lose a bit more weight." (I'm at a normal BMI.)
"You have a huge ass, stop eating this or that."

Fuck, I hate being a girl sometimes...its always about appearances, personality and brains really seem to mean jackshit to anyone.
 

Edith

Well-known member
NEGATIVE:

In highschool O sat beside a girl and thought that we were friends becasue I could talk to her... and then one day she interrupted me while I was asking her something and said, "I hope you don't mind... I mean, No offense... but I think I'm going to sit over there." And she went and sat with a different girl for the rest of the year. As minor as that seems... it wa sthe one thing that really killed me and made me plummet when I was young...

POSTIVE:

When I was at the bar the other week I was talking to these new people and they all wanted my number and then called me up to invite me out the next day. Also while at the bar some guy called me "gorgeous" and this girl said "I can't beleive we havn't met before! you're so much fun... what are you doing on Staurday?" That made me MUCH more confident, the thought that people could actually like me. The fact that they called makes me feel all the better. No matter how shallow this may sound. Having people like me and say nice things about me and seem to WANT to hang out with me when Im just being myeslf and not some fake loser like I used to try to be is a definate confidence booster.
 

princess_haru

Well-known member
Edith said:
In highschool O sat beside a girl and thought that we were friends becasue I could talk to her... and then one day she interrupted me while I was asking her something and said, "I hope you don't mind... I mean, No offense... but I think I'm going to sit over there." And she went and sat with a different girl for the rest of the year. As minor as that seems... it wa sthe one thing that really killed me and made me plummet when I was young...

Ouch, that's rough :( It doesn't seem minor to me, because being overlooked, ignored and generally treated like a leper hurts every bit as much as the more obvious bullying, especially when it's unexpected as it was in your case. I know; I've been there.

Sometimes the little things really wound us. I was always called by my full name (in a sarcastic, nasty voice) by kids in my class, as if I wasn't good enough to be just called by my first name in a normal, friendly way. And they always talked about me as if I wasn't there when I was sat right by them, in extra loud voices to make sure everyone knew I was being bitched about right in front of my face.

Well, at least we're not emotionally stunted, soulless little leeches that feed on other people's pain and humiliation because their cowardly, ugly hearts cannot find nourishment anywhere else :evil:


Gaah... sometimes it's good to vent!
 

recluse

Well-known member
RedRibbons said:
heh heh. a lot of mean things have been said to people, here. It's sad. And it sucks that they stick in our heads.

The worst for me..

"Do you have a problem with your sexuality?" - this guy in high school. I've been questioning my sexuality since then.. and it's no good, cause it started my ocd.

How sad! When i was in college some asshole started a rumour that i was gay.
 

Borx

Member
all these negative comments should be seen as a reflection on the shallow , ignorant people that say them . So the next time someone says something negative to you , just hold your head high and know that they are just disgracing themselves , good luck , everyone here is above that !
 

noblame4

Well-known member
(Christ in a barn, the sadistic bullshit people say to each other!!)

Me? well, I had this teacher in the fith grade who would bust me talking (back when i still talked sometimes) in class and chew me out in front of everytone, saying, "Did you take your medicine today?! No, you didnt! I can tell! You are insufferable to me, and everyone else when you dont take your medicine!!" (in grade school i was supposed to take ritalin for ADD that i DIDNT have, when i didnt take the pills, i was a normal, active tomboy, and when i did take the pills, i couldnt ...move. I couldnt talk or play, it made my body feel so stiff and cold. Therefore, 'nobody likes the real you. we all like you better when you dont say or do anything.' That woman made little kids cry all the time. it baffles me that she maintained a career working with children.)

My grandmother/mother figure, "Jessica! You've got to wear makeup when you go outside! Everyone judges you on how you look, and you've got to be pretty for people to like you, and you are not a naturally pretty girl, jessica lane! so get back in there and put on your makeup!" ~she said that all the time. To this day, I'd rather go outside pantless than go without makeup.

One time, when i was 16 or 17, i went to the doctor's office by myself, and this older man (50+) got to talking to me, and suddenly he said, "You know, you have really beautifull eyes. That's your attraction." And even if he was just some pervy old guy, that comment makes me really happy to this day.

And once when i was a senior in high school, i got one of my english assignments back, and the teacher had written on the back, "I always save your papers for last. They are always funny and interesting. I wish you would participate in class more." and that made me really happy.
 

Borx

Member
'And once when i was a senior in high school, i got one of my english assignments back, and the teacher had written on the back, "I always save your papers for last. They are always funny and interesting. I wish you would participate in class more." and that made me really happy.'

That is such a cool thing that your teacher wrote , you have obviously alot cool funny thoughts , if only people knew what they were missing , hehe :D
 

Emma

Well-known member
I was standing near this girl, and we got asked if we were friends, and she said, oh no way, I could never be friends with someone like her, she's so creepy.
I used to get told I looked like a pig too
 
Let see..

So let see, mmm i was in the 5th grade and i was only 9 years old. I had a friend named lets just call her "Elsa" and so Elsa knew i liked this boy who was a 4th grader and he was like 10 years old. SO one time the boy's teacher was absent so they put him in our class and then i was seating in the table with my other classmates when Elsa...the stupid Bi.tch then started saying. She likes, she likes and i thought she was joking and i thought she wouldn't dare to say it...and she said she likes "H" and i was so embarassed. So one of my boy classmates that was on the table got up and went and told him and i overheard them saying....SHE'S UGLY. I went home and cried for hours in the shower. Then in the 6 grade...i gained a lot of weight, had glasses and braces and one of my boy classmate said that i was ugly, and that i would never get marry and have a kid.... :(..i didn't even do anything to him damn...
 

LaLaLa

Well-known member
'eww i'm not sitting next to her 8O '

'she's like a zombie'

'don't tell me you fancy her? omg you are sad if you do. **** likes ***, he is sad! :eek:'

person #1: 'i've always thought that the reason why she never speaks is probably because she's really dumb/stupid'
person #2: 'haha! that's what i thought too!'

i remember there was this popular girl sitting on the same table with 2 boys trying to woo her. she went through everybody's names and asked if they find that person pretty and of course when it came to me they would be like 'nah, she's ugly!' ... then at the end she'd say 'who thinks i'm pretty?' they say 'me! me!' and raise their hands. :roll:

lol, can't believe i remember this stupid stuff. :?
 

sketchy24

Well-known member
Well I'm sure there are others but yesterday someone said I look like McLovin. I'm getting sick of people saying that. That was like the fourth person whos said that. They're not meaning to be insulting but it is. I already hate the way I look they don't need to make it worse saying I look like some horny supernerd.
 

ripewithdecay

Well-known member
One of my 8th grade teachers once said
"If you can't laugh at yourself, your life must really suck."
I wasn't very enthusiastic about being teased back then, so I guess that really hit home for me.
If I could go back i'd say to him - "No shit, sherlock!"
 

dpr

Well-known member
creep_x said:
mom to me "just look at you, you will rot your entire life, you'll be nothing, you will always be a failure"

oh man.. that is awful. ican't believe she said that to you
 

dpr

Well-known member
miss_amy said:
I can't think of a one off comment. I think its a string of constant put downs that have been my problem. Some that stick in my mind are

-my dad calling me a slut and tart and other similar names. I don't understand why, I wasn't, I know now but believed it then but didn't know why or how to fix myself. He once accused me of sleeping with his work friend, he was so nasty and spiteful. I was about 16. I did not do it and to this day it bothers me that he either thinks I did or could say such a thing if he knows its not true. I sometimes wonder whether confronting him over this an asking would help or just make things worse for me.

-'well we expected you to fail' when I failed my first driving test. Again my dad.

-and again......told me I was too thick for further education. i said the school says I'm good enough and he said they would say that coz they get their budget per student.

-ex calling me sack arse and scar belly and that Im absolutely disgusting. He found out that someone at work had asked me out. He stormed in and basically tried to floor the guy and started yelling in front of everyone about how gross I am with no clothes on. Sooooo embarrassed and then I got a warning from work because of his behaviour.


- my gran telling me my baby died because we were not married when he was conceived. How hurtful can people be.


oh my god! that fucking sucks! i hope you are not in contact with any of these people anymore because they sound like poison. i hope you have banned them from your life. you don't deserve that kind of treatment.

people suck
 

dpr

Well-known member
noblame4 said:
(Christ in a barn, the sadistic bullshit people say to each other!!)

Me? well, I had this teacher in the fith grade who would bust me talking (back when i still talked sometimes) in class and chew me out in front of everytone, saying, "Did you take your medicine today?! No, you didnt! I can tell! You are insufferable to me, and everyone else when you dont take your medicine!!" (in grade school i was supposed to take ritalin for ADD that i DIDNT have, when i didnt take the pills, i was a normal, active tomboy, and when i did take the pills, i couldnt ...move. I couldnt talk or play, it made my body feel so stiff and cold. Therefore, 'nobody likes the real you. we all like you better when you dont say or do anything.' That woman made little kids cry all the time. it baffles me that she maintained a career working with children.)

My grandmother/mother figure, "Jessica! You've got to wear makeup when you go outside! Everyone judges you on how you look, and you've got to be pretty for people to like you, and you are not a naturally pretty girl, jessica lane! so get back in there and put on your makeup!" ~she said that all the time. To this day, I'd rather go outside pantless than go without makeup.

One time, when i was 16 or 17, i went to the doctor's office by myself, and this older man (50+) got to talking to me, and suddenly he said, "You know, you have really beautifull eyes. That's your attraction." And even if he was just some pervy old guy, that comment makes me really happy to this day.

And once when i was a senior in high school, i got one of my english assignments back, and the teacher had written on the back, "I always save your papers for last. They are always funny and interesting. I wish you would participate in class more." and that made me really happy.

don't listen to her, girls always look better w/o makeup. well IMO anyway. i have had so many insensitive teachers that i have wondered the exact same thing about. but i don't think it's surprising they keep a career... they just treat it like a job. but sometimes i wonder if there ever was a time when they really wanted to help children, or if they just did like "eenie meenie minie mo" when they were picking careers.
 

steel_sparks

Active member
I used to get told to smile a lot, and people would say "cheer up it might never happen", little did they know the reason I wasn't happy was because It wasn't happening, whatever it was at the time.

on the plus side I got invited to a friends engagement party last night and that in it's self was a confidence boost but I went up to do karaoke and during an instrumental part a girl came up to t me and asked if my mic was on, when I said yes she said fair play, that really boosted my confidence that someone would think I sounded like peter andre. and then when I sat back down I got people asking me to go up again and I got a toast to my new found confidence from a friend.

Karaoke has boosted my confidence no end lately because of the many comments I've gotten, I know it's not a normal activity for a social phobic but after the first time I feel confident doing it and it's an escape from my normal timid self which will hopefully spread into my daily life.
 
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