No one knows you are shy
- Thread starter Dj SL
- Start date
DespairSoul
Well-known member
Yes so i do. I one second i have rejection and i get feedback and i wanna run of those situation and hide. Advice is good but on me dont work just dont
::
*Amy*
Well-known member
People don't like you, especially if they don't know you. Nobody can feel symptahy towards someone they don't know. They just want you to talk to fill a space between you and them and because they cannot remain in silence. They just want you to talk to know something about you, but that doesn't mean that they're interested in you.
3rd point is valid in my life. Other two I have to try yet.
Dj SL
Well-known member
@*Amy* you don't know if people like you or not because you don't know the person. They want you to talk to you to meet you. Once they know about you and you know about the other person... each other becomes friends, liking each other. People get interested in you when they know about you. "Nobody thinks like you"; everyone thinks different. Most of people wants to be friends.
Kiwong
Well-known member
1. People like me more than I think they do.
a)there are people who like me,
b) there are people who neutral towards me. Most people in fact, neither like me, or hate me.
c) There are one or two people who seriously hate me and show me nothing but spite
it is third category of person that is a challenge to my anxiety
2.) I am good at some situations and really bad at others. It is the situations that I am really bad at that trigger my anxiety. I think the trick is to improve my perfomance in those situations.
3) Rejection is real.
The trick is to acknowledge people who don't like you, or who will reject you, and not let it get under your skin.
a)there are people who like me,
b) there are people who neutral towards me. Most people in fact, neither like me, or hate me.
c) There are one or two people who seriously hate me and show me nothing but spite
it is third category of person that is a challenge to my anxiety
2.) I am good at some situations and really bad at others. It is the situations that I am really bad at that trigger my anxiety. I think the trick is to improve my perfomance in those situations.
3) Rejection is real.
The trick is to acknowledge people who don't like you, or who will reject you, and not let it get under your skin.
Last edited:
Dj SL
Well-known member
a) yes, there are people who likes you but you don't know because you don't get involved with people.
b) People like strangers are neutral at you, but people that is in your community( job, school, family) likes you.
c) If there are people who hates you, they don't care about you. So, don't care about them; If they bothering you: just tell them: you can say anything about me What you say doesn't affect me because you are not important to me and I don't care about you; then turn around and walk away
2) you're right social phobia is fear of some social situations that are going to trigger you anxiety. you have to find which situations triggers you anxiety and work on that.
3) Rejection is not real when you are social phobic because no one really knows you.
The trick is to improve your social skills. how? talk to people short conversations. Do this whenever you feel comfortable to do it. or just say hi or bye to someone.
b) People like strangers are neutral at you, but people that is in your community( job, school, family) likes you.
c) If there are people who hates you, they don't care about you. So, don't care about them; If they bothering you: just tell them: you can say anything about me What you say doesn't affect me because you are not important to me and I don't care about you; then turn around and walk away
2) you're right social phobia is fear of some social situations that are going to trigger you anxiety. you have to find which situations triggers you anxiety and work on that.
3) Rejection is not real when you are social phobic because no one really knows you.
The trick is to improve your social skills. how? talk to people short conversations. Do this whenever you feel comfortable to do it. or just say hi or bye to someone.
just wanna b normal
Well-known member
yeah SA is kind of the same thing as shyness so if you know how to control your shyness then maybe you can control your SA
Dj SL
Well-known member
@ just wanna b normal:
Shyness and SAD are totally different
Shy people are only shy; is not a mental disorder. There's 2 types of shy people: Introver shy and extrover shy. the introver is quiet and reserved, the extrover is talkative and outgoing. But they don't have the symptoms of a social phobic. They don't have on mind what Social phobics have.
SAD is a disorder that triggers you anxiety trying to avoid social situations.
Shyness and SAD are totally different
Shy people are only shy; is not a mental disorder. There's 2 types of shy people: Introver shy and extrover shy. the introver is quiet and reserved, the extrover is talkative and outgoing. But they don't have the symptoms of a social phobic. They don't have on mind what Social phobics have.
SAD is a disorder that triggers you anxiety trying to avoid social situations.
Kiwong
Well-known member
I like the idea of short conversations to build confidence.
You are right there are people who feel postively towards me, but I don't listen to the positive vibe enough.
However rejection is a real part of life, and can contribute to social phobia over time.
There are people in my work and around town that openly do not like me. It is hard avoiding the spitefulness of those wh go out of their way to be mean to you. It takes a very thick skin to not let that effect your self esteem.
You are right there are people who feel postively towards me, but I don't listen to the positive vibe enough.
However rejection is a real part of life, and can contribute to social phobia over time.
There are people in my work and around town that openly do not like me. It is hard avoiding the spitefulness of those wh go out of their way to be mean to you. It takes a very thick skin to not let that effect your self esteem.
just wanna b normal
Well-known member
nooo, it is kind of the same thing cuzz if you think about it social anxiety aka social phobia means yur scared to socialize you lack confidence & you care what they think which is the same thing as being shy if you look up the definition...
MsBuzzkillington
Well-known member
I have never really been able to tell the difference between social anxiety and shyness.
The fact that some people tell me I might just be shy and it's nothing like social anxiety, makes me feel like I am stuck in some sort of limbo. Am I really just "shy"? Do I not have social anxiety? Is what I feel nothing compared to others? If others feel worse and I am just shy, then shouldn't I be able to beat this easier? If I don't have it as bad as them, why do I feel so bad about it all the time?
Some people say they wish they were only just shy instead of having SA. But I really don't understand why. I don't understand how they are different. If you think that someone is just shy is different from you and you have SA, I want to know why you think that person has it easier than you do.
Not only that, there are so many different variations of SA. Even within these communities. Some people can do things that others can't. Some people have an easier time talking on the phone, others dread it.
So what is Social Anxiety anyway, and what if we are all only "just shy" but our anxiety levels are higher than "normal"?
and to add... I don't think you can be extroverted and shy. Those two clash. It's an oxymoron.
The fact that some people tell me I might just be shy and it's nothing like social anxiety, makes me feel like I am stuck in some sort of limbo. Am I really just "shy"? Do I not have social anxiety? Is what I feel nothing compared to others? If others feel worse and I am just shy, then shouldn't I be able to beat this easier? If I don't have it as bad as them, why do I feel so bad about it all the time?
Some people say they wish they were only just shy instead of having SA. But I really don't understand why. I don't understand how they are different. If you think that someone is just shy is different from you and you have SA, I want to know why you think that person has it easier than you do.
Not only that, there are so many different variations of SA. Even within these communities. Some people can do things that others can't. Some people have an easier time talking on the phone, others dread it.
So what is Social Anxiety anyway, and what if we are all only "just shy" but our anxiety levels are higher than "normal"?
and to add... I don't think you can be extroverted and shy. Those two clash. It's an oxymoron.
Last edited:
Dj SL
Well-known member
@MsBuzzKillington: there's a different between being shy and Social phobic because shy people only have the thoughts in them mind, and they feel worried when they are in a social situation where as Social phobic people have the thoughts all the time and they feel worried all the time. In the psychiatrist manual they don't consider shyness as a mental illness.
Yes there are extrover shy people, they feel positive shy anxiety. when they are with friends they can talk and be outgoing with their friends.
Yes there are extrover shy people, they feel positive shy anxiety. when they are with friends they can talk and be outgoing with their friends.
*Amy*
Well-known member
Then why don't they? Most times I've been surrounded by people in social situations (parties, classes, work) I see people talking to each other, and some of them start conversations with one or another, but not with me. So, what's the problem with me? This is what I've been wondering all my life.
MsBuzzkillington
Well-known member
But see... what I still don't get, is how you can distinguish between shyness and SA when there isn't even a technical term for shyness.
Shyness isn't a disorder. But SA. So why can't the two be the same thing. What if SA was just labeled as being shy because no one knew what SA was?
I mean, someone who is shy is scared to talk in public, scared to talk to people, scared to make eye contact, scared to do many things. So, I still don't see a real clear cut difference.
Shyness isn't a disorder. But SA. So why can't the two be the same thing. What if SA was just labeled as being shy because no one knew what SA was?
I mean, someone who is shy is scared to talk in public, scared to talk to people, scared to make eye contact, scared to do many things. So, I still don't see a real clear cut difference.