no friends

[davidburke]

I don't and never had any in school or anything:: I'm just wondering how many here have no friends or even never had any. how do you cope with it?

 

[LazyHermitCrab]

I went through periods without friends or at least they didn't really care.... HOBBIES learn the guitar, a language? and so on.... learning something new will make you more interesting so in the future you will have more friends? I'm not really sure how to make friends tbh it just happens and it will happen for you

 

[MrJones]

When I was younger I used to think I had friends, so it wasn't that bad though I didn't have any friends.
Now that I know how people really are... I have SPW.

Hobbies help, indeed. For me what used to work the best was music and videogames. Also reading and movies were cool to spend time, to forget I didn't have any friends.

 

[Hoppy]

I cope quite well, I've almost managed to convince myself I don't want or need friends.

I've got one woman that occasionally sent me texts (we used to have a sort of a relationship), and one male friend (bi-polar and gay (I'm not)) that occasionally phone me.

These are the only people in my 41 years that has ever invited me anywhere.

On the negative side I've met this girl last Saturday, and all of a sudden this lone wolf thing isn't attractive at all.

 

[davidburke]

I cope quite well, I've almost managed to convince myself I don't want or need friends.

yeah for years i tried to make myself think i don't need people that i'm better off but unfortunately the reality is humans need other humans full stop we are social creatures ::

 

[Kiwong]

Most of my life I have not had any friends. I have made friends through running, and on the internet recently. I live independently but I do need interaction, not on an especially deep level.

 

[Mike135]

Hobbies help, indeed. For me what used to work the best was music and videogames. Also reading and movies were cool to spend time, to forget I didn't have any friends.

I basically do the same.

 

[Insanewoman389]

I don't and never had any in school or anything:: I'm just wondering how many here have no friends or even never had any. how do you cope with it?

I only have one friend now(only hang out sometimes though) and only had a few in school like two or three. I cope with it by being with family, making friends online, or movies/books/tv shows anything to entertain me lol

 

[planemo]

I had "friends" throughout my school life, but not anymore. In school i got along with a few people, who were willing to get to know me. That was the extent of my friendships. not being in an environment like school where you are all condensed in a mostly social environment, means i can't make friends anymore. at the moment i speak to a couple of people online, but that's it.

i'm just so lucky i have the internet and the worlds best sports channels to keep me distracted enough, so that i don't feel really lonely and solitary. but when my mind is on the fact that i'm basically an outcast, i don't really deal with the isolation and boredom that well, in all honesty. ::

wish i had some advice, but all i can offer is my empathy.

 

[bardock]

I also thought I had friends in high school, the type of friends that only talk to you when they are in need of something.
and after high school, ive not heard from any of those so called "friends" since.
It's really depressing. but family is what keeps me going.

 

[MrJones]

I also thought I had friends in high school, the type of friends that only talk to you when they are in need of something.
and after high school, ive not heard from any of those so called "friends" since.
It's really depressing. but family is what keeps me going.

Basically this. It hurts to see that even when you try to keep being friends they just don't need you anymore ::

 

[recluse]

I have some aqquaintances, no close friends anywhere. My self esteem is far too low to have friends....Always has been, but without friends my self esteem gets even lower.

 

[razzle dazzle rose]

yeah for years i tried to make myself think i don't need people that i'm better off but unfortunately the reality is humans need other humans full stop we are social creatures ::

We are social creatures. Some people really have no need for much social interaction. If that were the case, things would be easier for most of us here. Loneliness is one of the hardest feelings to cope with. I have never managed to do so well. Yeah, I read, and I listen to music, watch movies, go online. But it is not enough. Sometimes you just need other people.

For most of my school years I was a loner, though I did experience two or three periods of popularity. I think that had more to do with me than those around me. I am once again interested in people, and I want to make room in my life for them. I have realized that I need friends, and I can put up with the minor annoyances they bring...

I've been experiencing several changes in my life as of late. I am in contact with more people. While I don't get to hang out with them necessarily, it is nice to talk to them (via FB, text). I have made friends here It has been a self-esteem boost for sure. It makes me feel like I am capable of this friend thing if I put forth the effort. I don't want to be lonely anymore!

 

[OceanMist]

This topic isn't discussed enough, probably because your average joe and jane have friends.

I too, don't have friends, but I've had friends in the past here and there.

Something I think is interesting is that the topic of "needing a g/f" is discussed as much as "needing friends" in these forums. It's very interesting, because often the guy who never has a g/f, is the same guy that doesn't have any friends. I am that guy, for instance.

Does somebody need friends? Technically, no. That doesn't mean it's not very dangerous, though. There is a lot of loneliness, depression and emptiness that comes with not having friends for long periods of time.

It's tough for people like me because if you ask me if it's better to have friends, I don't know the answer to that right now. I've been there, had friends for a lot of my life. Not as many as average people, but had friends. The time I had with friends was great at a younger age, and then turned very sour as I got older. It got to a point where I started to hate my friends, and had to leave them.

I hated their attitude towards me. I hated how I couldn't connect with them like they connected with eachother. I hated being the 5th wheel. I hated the boredom while being around them. I hated how anxious I got when around them and other people. I hated how they always wanted to meet new people, and I didn't.

 

[UnderTheBoughs]

I had relatively a lot of friends during my school years, a couple while I was at college and then everything went down the pan from when I left college. My brother is literally the only person I can almost be myself around... but he is the same as me... but personal matters just don't get discussed in my household and it's sometimes really depressing. Everyone just seems to ignore things...

I went to university after college, figured I would be able to make new friends because I've always managed it in the past, eventually. But after two years and still not knowing anybody, I got so lonely and depressed I had to quit and now I am a jobless and friendless. trying to get into therapy but I am waiting on a mental health organisation to get back to me...

I have been trying to pass the time by being busy with things. I have been doing karate for 2 years, it helps a bit but every time things don't go as well as I hope during the classes, like with sparring or anything really, I get really sad. It's like I'm just not good anything. When sparring with black belts they always say I need to relax more. I also try to make my own computer game, I have the knowledge and tools to programme it, but drawing the artwork and thinking of a story is just too hard for me, and so I get annoyed with that. Then I started to try and learn Russian, but I have taken so many breaks from it, I forget a lot of things, lose where I am with it and I get fed up with it. Now I am learning to drive as well, one of my biggest problems is that I try to do too much all at once, I'm too ambitious I think.

Most of the friends I have had in my life are there as my Friends on Facebook, but I only messaged them all once to ask what they were doing now, having not spoken to them in years, and after this I have no idea what I can say to them, and I never go on it.

 

[takeheart]

l had one good friend at school last year but he left for another school. Now l have no one to talk to really, even though l talk to some people l know well, I don't really cosider them friends to me. For now l got no friends as far as I`m concerned but it doesn't bother me at all. Always been a loner anyways

 

[EscapeArtist]

My experience tells me that if you put yourself out there, even just once, you have a pretty good chance of making a friend. Even if you don't talk! Not kidding... There are people like you everywhere and they will be drawn to you no matter how you are.