No Friends At All?

[Mr.Prez]

you're young and i'm assuming you deal with a social anxiety, or some form of anxiety since you're apart of this forum, so i can't say that i blame you for feeling the way you do.

however, trust me i've been there and done that regarding friends, and all i can say is to just give it time. believe it or not, there ARE people out there that are capable of being good friends to people like "us". i'm 31 and i didn't realize this until i was probably 25 or 26. so yeah "pop culture" sure has an effect on people in general, but there have always been good AND bad people in this world. having a constant negative outlook on society in general is a sure way to keep yourself free of friends.

you can try to convince yourself that you don't need anyone at all, but dont sell yourself short, because its possible for you to have friends. to make a friend, you have to be one.

That doesn't always work

 

[elek2ronik]

I like talking to people sometime. But we live in society where we change our outlook on life based on what someone thinks of us. I don't want to have to go through that. A "friend" that doesn't like something you do or that it's lame, it just makes me mad. So I feel I rather do what I want without caring what others feel.

yeah i know what you are saying. ive had my share of friends who i felt were judging me and felt like they were my friend at their own convenience.

i guess we all have to go through that during the process of making friends. fortunately ive been able to make a few good quality, trust-worthy friends out of all those people that weren't there for me. so to me, it was all worth it, because if i had not given others a chance, i probably wouldn't have met the good friends that i have now.

 

[elek2ronik]

That doesn't always work

well....it doesn't work, if the other person doesn't want to be your friend back. if that's the case, then move on. at least you tried right? that's all you can do if you think of yourself as a good person.

what's the alternative?

 

[elek2ronik]

The alternative is to learn how to cope being alone.

i guess you could accept that, if you truly feel that you're destined to be alone. i used to think that also, but i do find having friends helps my life and allows me to help others too.

i just refused to accept that i was meant to be alone in this life.

 

[MollyBeGood]

I used to have a few close friends but I have shut myself off from them and the world so I have no one. I have mixed feelings about friends though because I have been burnt by them so many times so I do feel like I am not missing out on much of anything. Either way, I do prefer my own company so it's okay.

 

[Mr.Prez]

The alternative is to learn how to cope being alone.

unfortunately it seems that way you can only try for so long

 

[Piece_By_Piece]

I had one friend. He has my cat, and which who recently passed away.
As for the human kind, I have none.
I thought I may have, or even an acquaintance but I tested this theory on facebook and the 78 friends I have, do not speak to me and they do not acknowledge me even if I make all the effort.
This is how I have come to discover I have no friends.
I have no other connection with people of the outside world as I rarely leave my house not because of my anxiety, but because I have no desire to. I have no interests which involve interaction with other people. A true introvert.

I'm not depressed by this however, why do I need friends when I am not compatible with many people, so why try befriending people I have no similar interests or similarities as a generalisation?
The people I have called friends in the past were all liars. They only felt sympathy towards me and never were good friends at all, instead treated me as if I was a second option or a doormat. They knew they could take advantage of me, so why should it bother me if I have not met one genuine person who will accept me for who I am.

I can so relate to how you feel. But it's just almost impossible for us loners to come together in real life, because of the fact that we are loners. How could two loners find each other in real life? It's pretty much an impossibility...

 

[OceanMist]

People throw it around a bit: "i've got no friends", when in reality they do have 1 or 2 people they talk to or hang out with occasionally, even if it's a rarity.

I know. I don't like it when people say that, when they really have friends they hang out with.

I've had similar problems with statements like that, like how people will tell you that they are experiencing what you are experiencing, yet, they really aren't. It's annoying when people try to say that they are shy too, and then you see them talking to every co-worker and customer confidently.

I mean, I appreciate the gesture of trying to make me feel like I'm not the only loser, but it still bothers me.

I literally have no friends. I have nobody outside of work or family that I talk to. People seem to not want to believe this fact. I guess because it's so depressing to them, they just don't want to believe that a 27 year old could be in my situation of friendlessness.

 

[Ms Cloud]

I know. I don't like it when people say that, when they really have friends they hang out with.

The one that always gets me is when people call themselves a hermit, and then a few lines into their blog or whatever they start talking about their spouse. I've seen that so many times, in fact I've given up trying to find my fellow hermits because they never turn out to be what they say they are.

I can so relate to how you feel. But it's just almost impossible for us loners to come together in real life, because of the fact that we are loners. How could two loners find each other in real life? It's pretty much an impossibility...

Yup, that's been my experience too. Real loners are hard to find. A lot of people use the term as a synonym for "single" or "introverted". I had an argument with someone about that once, lol. He insisted on calling himself a loner even though he was dating regularly. I think he liked how it made him sound mysterious and detached. I dunno.

 

[Clown]

Lost most of my friends past months now I have just 2 left ...-_-' before this sa I had many friends 10+ and was actually extroverted and now im still extrovert anxious with friends..
making new ones is to difficult it doens't come as naturally like it justed to be I feel have lost the connection between me and strangers, back before my sa I could talk about every nonsense thing there was and make jokes the first time I meet them... now im not just my self anymore ... how can one possible live with it self when one can't be his self anymore ???