I'm quieter than ever

[recluse]

For the past month o'r so i have sunk into depression and following a friend urging me to get help i did just that last week. I'm now on meds again after having been off them since 2009.

The thing that bothers me is that i am very conscious that i've become quieter than ever. Now i can count on one hand probably how many words i utter in day. I was always a quiet guy all my life anyway but this is different....I feel dead. I cannot think of anything to talk about and i can't think of responces to things said to me/how to maintain a conversation.

My mind is so filled with negative thoughts and past memories it's impossible, and on the other hand my mind is totally blank of any ideas to talk about. I also have no motivation to talk to people. Don't get me wrong i am still polite and i won't ignore anyone but i have little motivation to be around people though i yearn for companionship.

I cannot remember the last time i had a flowing convo with anyone...Several years ago i think, instead i merely utter some words which never flow into a convo. It feels like a lifetime when i laughed too.....I mean a genuine laugh.

 

[dragonoth]

Despite how you feel, just go talk to people anyway. The more you do something, the easier it becomes. Drag yourself across Hell if you have to.

Also I'd take a look at those meds you're putting in yourself. You sure you need them?

 

[shakethelight]

regarding the med thing, i went through hell and back trying to find the right combo for me. maybe what youre taking isnt for you, i think it takes up to 3 weeks for you to be able to tell? but I am a big fan of l-theanine, you can just buy that at your local store. i really hope things improve for you. I know how terrible it is.

 

[jryden]

I'm in the same position. I wnt ingnore or be rude to someone who talks to me but I'd rather they don't. I want to be left alone and have no motivation to start a conversation.

 

[recluse]

Despite how you feel, just go talk to people anyway. The more you do something, the easier it becomes. Drag yourself across Hell if you have to.

Also I'd take a look at those meds you're putting in yourself. You sure you need them?

It's difficult.

A friend forced me to go to my dr. She gave me an ultimatum that she'd stop contact with me unless i did so.

 

[recluse]

regarding the med thing, i went through hell and back trying to find the right combo for me. maybe what youre taking isnt for you, i think it takes up to 3 weeks for you to be able to tell? but I am a big fan of l-theanine, you can just buy that at your local store. i really hope things improve for you. I know how terrible it is.

I'm on Citalopram (celexa) and they do take about two weeks to kick in. My dr told me that because i've been on them before that i should get effects quicker.

 

[recluse]

I'm in the same position. I wnt ingnore or be rude to someone who talks to me but I'd rather they don't. I want to be left alone and have no motivation to start a conversation.

Exactly, but i feel lonely at the same time.

 

[lonelee1]

I know exactly how you feel. I was reflecting on this about myself all day. I meet w a friend for a drink and didn't even hear or comprehend what he was saying. Nothing to reply, nothing to start a new part of or conversation, nothing. so I feel for you, it is lonely. Hope u feel better

 

[kilojoule]

Im sorry You're feeling like this. I remember it just as you described it

I like the advice shakethelight gave.

Nothing lasts forever this feeling too will pass

 

[Emperor]

Yeah, this always happens to me, I don't know what to talk about with people my age, I just stay silent and do nothing. It's the main reason I don't have a lot of friends.

Thank god I have my best friend , we can't stop talking with each other, I love him.

 

[laure15]

Me too. When I was little, it was so easy for me to socialize with my classmates. I was more talkative and had more friends. Fast-forward to the present and I have become quieter, and slower in conversations. I don't really know how to start conversations, except with a question, and I usually can't find anything interesting to talk about. When people ask me something, I take longer to respond, but I try not to ignore people. My social skills have deteriorated so much.

But it's weird that I am the complete opposite when it comes to online chat. When I chat with people, I am more lively.