I Weird or Strage?

[PrincessKitty]

I'm 21 and everyone that I know has either got a family or got a boyfriend/girlfriend.
I just don't want that, I want a career a successfull career but everyone is telling me I'm strange because I want that.
Even when I meet up with people who are in their 50's they say to me "oh I met my partner around your age"
Or
"This is about around the time when I got married or pregnant"

Some people that I know have graduated university and they want a wife/husband straight after it.
And the some of the girls that I know think I'm strange becaus they rather be a house wife than having a career. But I love working... so they think I'm weird.
So they say I'm strange because I don't want that. I just want my career.

Also, its strange because I don't have a boyfriend either. So they think I'm weird. :crying:

 

[Alienated]

You do know you can have both don't you ?

 

[SilentBird]

You're all right, you just have different priorities.

 

[laure15]

I'm on the same boat. You're not weird or strange. In my opinion, 21 is way too young to get married and/or pregnant. Having kids can tie you down for many years. Watch Teen Mom and you'll see how hard it is to raise kids and have a partner at the same time.

 

[kilojoule]

oh for goodness sake!

You are 21!

Im glad I didnt make any big commitments to others at 21 because I dont have the same friends or family or live in the same place or have the same job or religion or the same interests or the same hair colour or the same pet....etc etc just about everything in my life changed ten fold since then because I changed ten fold since then and Im only 28 now.

Each to their own

But I think you're smart

 

[Subpop]

Not at all. I have worked with a couple of female engineers who at 24 are already assuming responsibility for running an offshore drilling operation (with mentoring from a senior manager with 25 years + experience) They were single and in no hurry to enter a relationship....they were incredibly career focused but very genuine at the same time. I have a niece who is 19 and has never had a boyfriend etc as she was very focused on sport and school now is very career focused at university. My other niece is about to become a licenced electrician at 22 and is focused on working and paying off a place she purchased at aged 21. Everyone is different....I can occasionally become very cynical regarding 'societal norms' that the media try to force feed us every day in order to reinforce cultural norms and manipulate peoples emotions and actions.

Do what you feel is right for you, try to recognise and not to give into perceived pressure to do what people around you seem to think you should do. By starting this thread....it seems you are already aware of the potential negative influence of others. If you want to be career focused, go for it.

 

[JohnnAY]

21 is WAAAY to early to raise a family... It used to be the norm that after high school, people just start popping out babies. Take your time, there's still a lot of growing for you do. The more experience you gain in life, the more you will have to pass on to your child.

My parents had me in their early 20's, they had NO idea what they were doing.

 

[Steppen-Wolf]

You should marry if/when you want to.

Your life is yours only. To hell with what anyone else thinks is "normal".

 

[Odo]

Don't get married young... I guarantee that you will miss out.

 

[Steelsoul]

I don't think you're strange. At your age people should focus on career, friends, sports or something like that. 21 is too soon to have a family. You're still young. You should have fun doing what you want before having to take care of your husband and children.

 

[SpaceGhost]

I'm in the same boat. I'll be 21 in a couple of months and a relationship/marriage is the last thing on my mind. First and foremost is school, do well and get a decent paying job, that is my focus right now. You aren't weird for having a different set of priorities than someone else, do what you want in life and forget about what others tell you.

 

[Shrimp]

I'm 20 and I only had one girlfriend for 4 years, and now I'm all alone.

My dad tell me that he wants me to have allot of casual sex with women, and he gets angry whenever I tell him I want to stick with one girl for the rest of my life.
You' should not worry so much about it, you'll find the right person when the time comes.
You just have a different opinion on relationships than most people, maybe a little old fashioned like mine but we're not being wrong or stuckup.

21 is a little young to have children and get married though, most people start thinking about settling down at the age of 25+, atleast that's how it is where I live.

 

[PrincessKitty]

thanks for all the comments and the opinions. there are really helpful. i thought i was strange but not anymore. so thanks :3

 

[PrincessKitty]

21 is a little young to have children and get married though, most people start thinking about settling down at the age of 25+, atleast that's how it is where I live.

same where i live too... its annoying. but i don't want that though :thumbdown:. like you said I am old fashioned in my ways and I like it. I guess I just want career first lol.
thanks for your help erfect:

 

[kilojoule]

thanks for all the comments and the opinions. there are really helpful. i thought i was strange but not anymore. so thanks :3

You're not strange at all.

I think people settling down at 20&21 are in the minority. I have friends who married young because of their religion but otherwise, I know relatively few people who got married so young.

 

[jc972]

I don't think you're weird. So you like to work? That's not weird. So what about them starting a family or being married at your age, good for them. Doesn't mean you have to.

 

[PrincessKitty]

You're not strange at all.

I think people settling down at 20&21 are in the minority. I have friends who married young because of their religion but otherwise, I know relatively few people who got married so young.

thats the thing though, im a christian so half well most of the people i know are already married or have kids. and there expecting me to get married at my age. (Two people i know got married younger than me) and they think I'm stange.
Well because of my religion, it's like I have to, well to be honest I want really want to. I feel like that I'm presured all the time, its shit really.

 

[Feathers]

thats the thing though, im a christian so half well most of the people i know are already married or have kids. and there expecting me to get married at my age. (Two people i know got married younger than me) and they think I'm stange.
Well because of my religion, it's like I have to, well to be honest I want really want to. I feel like that I'm presured all the time, its shit really.

I kinda understand what you're talking about, I'm Catholic and most people I know have gotten married or coupled up too... many not at such a young age tho, I'm way older than you..
I was too career-focused before too (and haven't found anyone tempting enough to marry lol!) just wish to warn you that you can suddenly wake up in your mid-30's and nothing has changed lol!
So, maybe try to find some sort of balance with socializing and career and meeting new people etc. To still be open to have both career and a happy relationship/marriage...

Take care!

 

[Xervello]

I agree with everyone else. You're not weird OR strange. But you Are a bad speller though.

Not that there's anything wrong with being weird or strange, mind you. If everyone was the same, life would be like a Republican political convention. *Shivers at the thought*

 

[Flanscho]

Depends on the nation you live in, on the society and which part of the society you are in as well.

Of my closest 10 friends or so, in their early 30s, nobody is married. Sure, there are long term relationships, but the people simply live together without marrying.