I don't get people who complain a lot

gustavofring

gustavofring

Well-known member
Sorry for my rant in advance, and I know this is itself a complaint so I'm a hypocrite.

At my job as a hotel clerk I occasionaly have to deal with complaining entitled people. I don't get why people can truly get worked up over the most pointless details. Sure, people want their money's worth. But stuff like "the bed is not long enough", "the room is a little on the small side" etc. and then getting a bit of an attitude towards me as a hotel clerk. I understand the problem, and I want to help, but I could care less for the attitude of arrogance and entitledness that often comes along with it. If people remain calm and nice and not let their ego/emotions take the overhand I am way more willing to help and it puts me in a less stressful position, win win.

It's such an ingrained trait of (western) society to be so incredibly entitled, always wanting their way. I myself am pretty easy going I guess, if something goes wrong or isn't the way I wanted, I accept it and make as minimal a fuzz about it. Unfortunately a lot of people have the idea that being a drama queen is rewarded in the world, and sadly they are right.

The sad thing is, I take a lot of things personally on the job, and while I am able to set aside a lot of pointless complaints and incidents, I take some of it with me and keep worrying about it.
 
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Pacific_Loner

Pacific_Loner

Pirate from the North Pole
I know what you're saying. These people don't bother me that much though since I'm not too much in contact with them. But I sometimes feel bad for them because it must be exhausting to be unsatisfied like this all the time.... There's always a small detail ruining the moment :/
 
cowboyup

cowboyup

Well-known member
I know just what you are talking about.

I complain/whine a lot - on here, I know I am hypocritical. But in 'real life' I don't do that. I am generally an easy going person - but I tend to keep things bottled up and all that ends up here on SPW. :(

I like what you said that it's an ignorant trait of that people seem to think they are entitled...you sure hit that right on spot!

I too, take a piece of it with me when others complain in my presence.

For example, my SIL came home yesterday and found the one of the dog's made a big mess on the rug - so instead of cleaning it up and putting the dogs outside, she whines and huff and puffs for the longest time and then ended up throwing the rug away and calling my brother (her husband) at work (and he's a cop) to complain to him what the dogs did.

Cut to this morning: she's in one foul mood! lol
Now I feel her negativity is bringing me down if that makes sense.

Like you said, we live in such an entitled society .. it's sad.
 
gustavofring

gustavofring

Well-known member
Maybe this is also a trait of extroverts and (over)confident people?

When something isn't going their way they are willing to go to more length and more vocally to get it their way.
 
paintedblue

paintedblue

Well-known member
gustavofring said:
Maybe this is also a trait of extroverts and (over)confident people?

When something isn't going their way they are willing to go to more length and more vocally to get it their way.
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Perhaps but i've known people who are confident as hell and don't really delve into complaining.

I do understand exactly where you're coming from. Where I work there's plenty of co-workers who all they really do is complain. Complain about hours, complain about who did this or that and why they did it, about so and so gettin a promotion. And to me it just seems very trivial some of the stuff these people fly off the handle for and loose their temper, its pathetic even. Pretty much they lose perspective of what really important. You needn't lose your temper on such small flimsy things people, save your outrage for when you REALLy get screwed.
 
gustavofring

gustavofring

Well-known member
Hm you're right. It probably isn't really an introvert/extrovert distinction or confident/unconfident but more different ways how people choose to handle and interpret situations and how they communicate to others.

Complaining co-workers, yeah. It seems about 80% of conversation in the workplace is simply complaining or gossiping.
 
theoutsider

theoutsider

Well-known member
I've found that once people are traveling, they go into what I call "Butthole Mode". They start looking at every person along the way, from the flight attendants on their airplane to the hotel personnel as "little people" whose jobs are to cater to their every whim. I've seen this happen over and over again. I think there are an awful lot of people who feel walked on in their daily lives. Perhaps they are peons in their own jobs. So once they go on travel they want to live the fantasy of being upper crusty and talk down to people in service roles. When I worked retail I saw this on a daily basis. It's not going to stop, the best thing to do is to not take it personally and realize that you are a lot more rational than they are. Think of them as belligerent children and you are the parent.
 
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gustavofring

gustavofring

Well-known member
theoutsider said:
I've found that once people are traveling, they go into what I call "Butthold Mode". They start looking at every person along the way, from the flight attendants on their airplane to the hotel personnel as "little people" whose jobs are to cater to their every whim. I've seen this happen over and over again. I think there are an awful lot of people who feel walked on in their daily lives. Perhaps they are peons in their own jobs. So once they go on travel they want to live the fantasy of being upper crusty and talk down to people in service roles. When I worked retail I saw this on a daily basis. It's not going to stop, the best thing to do is to not take it personally and realize that you are a lot more rational than they are. Think of them as belligerent children and you are the parent.
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Lol, butthold mode. Very true.
Thankfully then there are also people who just want to have a good time when they're on holiday or travelling and are just nice and normal and treat you like a normal human being. These people make the job better and it's nice to strike up conversation.

But the number of times some bighead comes walking in with an attitude really drags down the job. Especially when they go into sarcastic mode or passive agressive, like you're the doormat man they can walk on. It's a challenge to stay nice, for sure.
 
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xDreamseller

xDreamseller

Well-known member
I work as a cashier and I get this all the time too. People complain to me when things go wrong, 99% of the time due to something beyond my control.

A loaf of bread scanned through at $1.50 instead of $1.40 and the customer acts blames me, as if I run both the till and the whole computer system running the store. Or if I say something isn't in stock, they react as if I'm just saying that as I'm lazy and can't be bothered to check.

The best happened tonight though. Our lottery machine was broken and at least 70% of the customers I had to turn away became irate, most of which threw a barrage of cuss words my way. First time, I felt it a little personal...by the end of the evening it was hilarious watching people blow up and storm out of the shop.

I don't get it...getting angry like that only makes the situation worse and causes people to NOT want to help you. Stay calm and be nice...people are surprisingly helpful most of the time if you don't make them feel like crap.
 
theoutsider

theoutsider

Well-known member
gustavofring said:
Lol, butthold mode. Very true.
Thankfully then there are also people who just want to have a good time when they're on holiday or travelling and are just nice and normal and treat you like a normal human being. These people make the job better and it's nice to strike up conversation.

But the number of times some bighead comes walking in with an attitude really drags down the job. Especially when they go into sarcastic mode or passive agressive, like you're the doormat man they can walk on. It's a challenge to stay nice, for sure.
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Oops, that was supposed to read Butthole Mode, not Butthold...lol.
 
theoutsider

theoutsider

Well-known member
xDreamseller said:
I work as a cashier and I get this all the time too. People complain to me when things go wrong, 99% of the time due to something beyond my control.

A loaf of bread scanned through at $1.50 instead of $1.40 and the customer acts blames me, as if I run both the till and the whole computer system running the store. Or if I say something isn't in stock, they react as if I'm just saying that as I'm lazy and can't be bothered to check.

The best happened tonight though. Our lottery machine was broken and at least 70% of the customers I had to turn away became irate, most of which threw a barrage of cuss words my way. First time, I felt it a little personal...by the end of the evening it was hilarious watching people blow up and storm out of the shop.

I don't get it...getting angry like that only makes the situation worse and causes people to NOT want to help you. Stay calm and be nice...people are surprisingly helpful most of the time if you don't make them feel like crap.
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I can totally relate. One of my first jobs was working as a teller at a bank. I got blamed when the customer would bounce a check, if they felt their interest didn't calculate correctly, if the line was long, you name it. Once, a customer had spoken to someone in our customer services department who she felt was rude to her. She marched into the bank and started giving me the riot act as if I was the customer service rep who insulted her.
 
W

w*n*c*a*m

Well-known member
It's not just a western attitude, believe me. I even thought that this kind of 'arrogance' is more of an elite or 'wannabe' elite asian attitude.

In the workplace, I also observed that most co-workers love criticizing other co-workers even their own friends (behind their back of course). That fact doesn't help my SA at all. Maybe that's why I am more mum in the workplace than in other social situation. I even deny that I have Facebook. lol.
 
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MollyBeGood

MollyBeGood

Well-known member
Most of all society has entitlement issues. This is the problem with our world if you ask me. People are ungrateful asses who think the whole world revolves around them. Like people who complain about gas prices I mean really, or any prices ...Don't like it? Make it yourself/invent something better or don't buy the damn thing in the first place. Stupid, stupid people.
 
A86

A86

Well-known member
problem is. it can pay to complain. if it didn't, then no one would.

while I find it morally taboo I can not help but wonder where I'd be if I...

argued for a pay rise instead of just accepting what is.
argued for correct change if I was short handed a small amount (it probably adds up)
argued for better this or that to make my quality of life better.

complainers potentially gain more than they lose and as I get older I am starting to see more and more benefits.

its still completely selfish though.
 
J

jaim38

Well-known member
Complaining does have its benefits. I vent a lot on here. Without SPW, I don't know if I would last. SPW is like my 24/7 buddy, always there to listen.

Complaining is also similar to protesting. People protest for human rights, animal rights, healthy food, and other good causes.

But complaining can be excessive. Some people complain about trivial stuff such as the spinach on their plate. Spinach is healthy and people should eat more of it.
 
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