I can easily make online friends...

[Social_Monstrosity]

But after a week they seem to fade away :/

In real life, however, I stand zero chance at making any friends.

Is anybody else like this?

 

[vj288]

But after a week they seem to fade away :/

In real life, however, I stand zero chance at making any friends.

Is anybody else like this?

I can relate. I think it's because online you can be as open as close friends right away but without building the relationship first the bottom falls out quickly. I don't think it's always like this, but it could be.

 

[RelentlessHamster]

Some people here will write you a couple of messages and then they quickly get bored is that what you mean?

I think it is actually easier to make friends in real-life.

 

[AGR]

I dont make many friends,because I cant relate to many people.

 

[Feathers]

Well I can make friends in RL and online.. The trick is to not expect too much of them... Especially on sites like this..

The other person may not have written back because they're having a bad day or bad week and you asked them something simple like, 'How's it going?'

And that person may still like you and may be more than willing to talk about other things with you...

Also, maybe it's good if you give yourself a pleasant nickname or at least something neutral? So that just by talking to you people can associate you with something nice or uplifting? And it's good to talk about different things, thus not overwhelming people too much with one topic or such..
If you vent about something, it may be good to discuss it with several people, not just one.. Ideally with some in RL too, cause they can bring a different perspective about it..

There are lots of tips and tricks on how to establish and maintain friendships.. and good communication.. so I really recommend learning more on this, there are books and sites..

Sometimes it's not easy to do good communication stuff if one feels sucky etc, or if you feel too good you might get hyper too lol.. So, just take your friends like people who may have troubles in RL and may be a bit busy at the time.. And if you have something of interest to them write them anyway and not expect answers.. If they answer, it's a bonus!

The thing about getting friends, is being a friend first.. It was really eye-opening for me to think about it this way.. And it's important to give people space and when they want to talk they will, otherwise you can find new and more exciting friends to hang with, meanwhile..

I do recommend learning more about communication and such meanwhile..

 

[Acegame]

I'm having a hard time making friends also. But its more because i cant get into "the zone" anymore. With that i mean i cant get comfortable in a conversation with people i dont rly know anymore, where it feels easy to talk about anything. So thats a fase before asking somebody over or initiate to do something together. And the times when i do get in "the zone" i feel that im to uninteresting and boring to do something together.

 

[SilentStranger]

I dont make many friends,because I cant relate to many people.

I feel the same. Both online and offline. I find most people don't have the same interests as me, so I really got nothing to talk about.

 

[ilmatross]

Me too.

I don't know if Id want them switched, the people I talk to on a daily basis that I've met online are far more interesting.

 

[Feathers]

I feel the same. Both online and offline. I find most people don't have the same interests as me, so I really got nothing to talk about.

I used to feel like that for a long time, especially when I started learning about the eco things.. It took a while, but now I've found language to talk about these things with many people.. (not everyone yet, sometimes it takes a while to figure out how to spin it..) Maybe you just need to learn more about your interests and what makes them fascinating to other people too...? Or how to present things so 'ordinary people' can understand them?

 

[Dronee]

On here at least, don't worry too much if people don't reply to you on the chat. Quite often, it's the chat program itself acting up. It's very erratic.

 

[Diend]

But after a week they seem to fade away :/

In real life, however, I stand zero chance at making any friends.

Is anybody else like this?

OMG. I'm a social butterfly online...I just randomly join chatrooms and add people on forums just because I want to be their friend. In real life, I don't just walk into a group of people who're talking. In real life i don't talk to people I want to befriend. I wait for them to initiate something.

 

[Orbital]

To the people who can make online friends, where do you meet them and what do you usually talk about?

 

[punklove]

Yes that describes me perfectly

 

[Sial Axetder]

Well I can make friends in RL and online.. The trick is to not expect too much of them... Especially on sites like this..

The other person may not have written back because they're having a bad day or bad week and you asked them something simple like, 'How's it going?'

And that person may still like you and may be more than willing to talk about other things with you...

Also, maybe it's good if you give yourself a pleasant nickname or at least something neutral? So that just by talking to you people can associate you with something nice or uplifting? And it's good to talk about different things, thus not overwhelming people too much with one topic or such..
If you vent about something, it may be good to discuss it with several people, not just one.. Ideally with some in RL too, cause they can bring a different perspective about it..

There are lots of tips and tricks on how to establish and maintain friendships.. and good communication.. so I really recommend learning more on this, there are books and sites..

Sometimes it's not easy to do good communication stuff if one feels sucky etc, or if you feel too good you might get hyper too lol.. So, just take your friends like people who may have troubles in RL and may be a bit busy at the time.. And if you have something of interest to them write them anyway and not expect answers.. If they answer, it's a bonus!

The thing about getting friends, is being a friend first.. It was really eye-opening for me to think about it this way.. And it's important to give people space and when they want to talk they will, otherwise you can find new and more exciting friends to hang with, meanwhile..

I do recommend learning more about communication and such meanwhile..

Makes sense to me.

Admit I may give too much space? No reply, thinking conversation is over. Terrible at starting conversation. And do want to be an intruder.
Space continually drifts out. Disassociation occurs.

Being friend first, works. At least in real life.

Distracted thought: To know we require tricks to succeed....

For me it has always been friends find me. Not sure why or how.
One possible reason: Once you get to know me, I'm not so bad.

Ever catch a fly only to release it again?

 

[MaliceInWickedland]

I have a few friends in real life and.... altogether I've had about a hundred or so online over the years (not counting the ones on this site) but I don't really keep in touch with all of them. I feel like people always expect me to message them first, which I used to do before but now I don't even bother since people either don't reply or they reply very half-assed.

 

[EscapeArtist]

I have a few friends in real life and.... altogether I've had about a hundred or so online over the years (not counting the ones on this site) but I don't really keep in touch with all of them. I feel like people always expect me to message them first, which I used to do before but now I don't even bother since people either don't reply or they reply very half-assed.

**** man! I've only had like 8 friends in total ever! 100?

 

[MaliceInWickedland]

**** man! I've only had like 8 friends in total ever! 100?

Well it's just an educated guess, but I'm pretty sure the total number is almost 100 for my online friends. Random people kept adding me on inkpop and facebook so yeah ::

We've only chatted once or twice before communication completely faded between us so I wouldn't technically consider them "friends", just people who found me interesting or something else I can't really fathom.