I appreciate the encouragement. 🙂 It's just that it's come to a point where it feels like I'm just treading water. Like no matter what I do I always end up in the same spot I were before.
Been bitching about dad recently, but mum has her flaws as well.
For instance i HATE it when she tells me what to do with people, or "corrects" me; it feels like i'm a "baby" or immature, & NEED guiding; I'M A ****ING 45 YEAR OLD MAN for christ sakes!!!. Let me make MY OWN F*CKING MISTAKES!!!. In doing so, all these years, she has STOPPED me from gaining CONFIDENCE with people. Good intentions, bad results. :kickingmyself:
(But then, she was never an expert at raising children - VERY mediocre, verging on bad - and dad, well he's a COMPLETE DISASTER at raising children (or raising me at least)).
Been bitching about dad recently, but mum has her flaws as well.
For instance i HATE it when she tells me what to do with people, or "corrects" me; it feels like i'm a "baby" or immature, & NEED guiding; I'M A ****ING 45 YEAR OLD MAN for christ sakes!!!. Let me make MY OWN F*CKING MISTAKES!!!. In doing so, all these years, she has STOPPED me from gaining CONFIDENCE with people. Good intentions, bad results. :kickingmyself:
Depressingly, I can relate all to well... My Dad wus a right b@$%@rd and my Mum still treats me like a baby, despite being an adult. Sheltered me way too much like... Does your mother also speak for ye? Mine does. :omg: Though, worse than that or the telling me what to do, she'll ask me a question then answer it for me, without giving me a chance to respond. :thumbdown:
I appreciate the encouragement. 🙂 It's just that it's come to a point where it feels like I'm just treading water. Like no matter what I do I always end up in the same spot I were before.
I used to feel like that but things got better. I still have hard days but im doing alright now.
Its good to remember that each new day potentially brings new opportunities as long as you keep pushing forward. If you stop trying , you begin to limit future opportunities.
Theres no telling what might happen tommorow or the next day as long as you keep your head in the game.
Just visualize yourself as a bad a$s valkyrie conquering your goals one day at a time.
If i said 'can i say something personal' or 'can i ask a personal question', she's DEFINATELY gonna say no, RIGHT???, & so :. i shall feel rejected (as I KNOW that SHE KNOWS what "sort" of question i'm wanting to ask). :question: :question: :question:
About an hour ago, i rang a "friend" (11.30 pm). I'd been to a pub & had a few drinks with him once, 4 months ago. I just felt like someone to talk to. After the pub, i went to his place, where he played LOUD rock music on his ~PS4 projector console, waking his wife & kid in the process (the kid had misplaced the cable for console, so he woke him up to ask him where it was), & serving me dinner (& a few more drinks). After that (his wife was annoyed, saying 'why are you doing this?'), we've had ZERO contact (he was saying 'i'll show you the world', etc, etc) but he failed to contact me after that night. So, he picked up the phone & said 'who's this?' -> ~'i'm S... F... (sorry jinxed!), you might remember me', him ~'why are you ringing this late, is this urgent?', me ~'sorry if i woke you mate, i thought you stayed up late' (a wee unplanned rhyme there, hehe), him ~'call me in the morning'.
So that's how i'm feeling! lol (a complex mixture of this'n'that)
Ps: Playing steely dan & drinking, late at night, been inside all day due to constant rain
If i said 'can i say something personal' or 'can i ask a personal question', she's DEFINATELY gonna say no, RIGHT???, & so :. i shall feel rejected (as I KNOW that SHE KNOWS what "sort" of question i'm wanting to ask). :question: :question: :question:
Depend on the kinda mood she in at the time o' ya asking her the question. If she quite crabbit, she'll likely snap at ye. If she gets defensive then she doesnae want to talk aboot it.
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