How are you feeling?

[JuiceB]

Blank. Not good or bad, I'm not feeling anything right now which is probably a sign of worse things to come.

Stupid/exhausted. Yesterday night I had family come over and even from out of town. They were drinking and cutting a fool and talking about everyone. They are super superstitious, racist, and prejudice even without the liquor in their system. My mother has a big mouth she put me on the spot and told all of my business and she went there about other things too. It made me so glad I never really told her other things because my family would abuse me to the grave until I did things the way they wanted to. I wanted to throw up. It was a horrible night for me.

My mother is like that. She always tells my business even when I ask her not to. She'll respond with something like "Well, it's just family", like it matters.

Hope you feel better soon.

 

[Opaline]

Missing certain parts of my childhood and having one of those "I wish things were simpler like they used to be" moments. I just long for peace and contentment and hope. I'm always so filled with fear. Being a human is scary sometimes.

 

[megalon]

I'm feeling pretty good right now. I was invited to go to dinner at a new restaurant with some coworkers. I actually managed to keep my anxiety in check the whole time. I wasn't sweating and stuttering and mumbling. At one point some people got up to go to the bathroom, leaving me alone with a girl I am quite attracted to who works in another department, and I didn't just sit there in awkward silence. I actually had a conversation with her. Then I drove another girl home since we live in the same town and she doesn't have a car. During the car ride, I felt anxiety free, like I was actually able to be myself. If only I could hold onto this feeling.

 

[BlueDays]

I'm feeling pretty good right now. I was invited to go to dinner at a new restaurant with some coworkers. I actually managed to keep my anxiety in check the whole time. I wasn't sweating and stuttering and mumbling. At one point some people got up to go to the bathroom, leaving me alone with a girl I am quite attracted to who works in another department, and I didn't just sit there in awkward silence. I actually had a conversation with her. Then I drove another girl home since we live in the same town and she doesn't have a car. During the car ride, I felt anxiety free, like I was actually able to be myself. If only I could hold onto this feeling.

^Good on you!



My flu just won't go away :/
I have no energy left at all. Lonely and sick. I need a holiday from life

 

[BlackPuma]

^Good on you!



My flu just won't go away :/
I have no energy left at all. Lonely and sick. I need a holiday from life

I was planning a trip to Narnia soon, you can come along if you want. If not from life, you can take a vacation from reality. I'm just waiting for Stephen Hawking to call me back about the portal I'm building. Fictional places are really difficult to get to apparently.. I've called him 38 time before without answer, but I've got a good feeling about this time.

Pack your bags for adventure~ (aspirins, shoe polish, wet wipes, sword, shield, ect. You know, the usual).

 

[MikeyC]

I'm feeling pretty good right now. I was invited to go to dinner at a new restaurant with some coworkers. I actually managed to keep my anxiety in check the whole time. I wasn't sweating and stuttering and mumbling. At one point some people got up to go to the bathroom, leaving me alone with a girl I am quite attracted to who works in another department, and I didn't just sit there in awkward silence. I actually had a conversation with her. Then I drove another girl home since we live in the same town and she doesn't have a car. During the car ride, I felt anxiety free, like I was actually able to be myself. If only I could hold onto this feeling.

Awesome.

My flu just won't go away :/
I have no energy left at all. Lonely and sick. I need a holiday from life

I'm sorry. Hopefully the flu disappears. It's a hell of a thing.

 

[MikeyC]

Well, I lost more weight, as I checked this morning, and I went to the gym and had an alright shift.

Yet I'm still depressed.

Something is wrong. My mood is low and I can't really understand why. Today is Friday, so that's going to help me out in terms of getting some sleep. That's what I've put it down to: lack of sleep. I'm annoyed at myself for letting it get to this stage.

I want to eat chocolate to give myself some happy feelings, but that will undo everything I've done in the last month. I can't do that. I have to find some other way.

 

[BlueDays]

I was planning a trip to Narnia soon, you can come along if you want. If not from life, you can take a vacation from reality. I'm just waiting for Stephen Hawking to call me back about the portal I'm building. Fictional places are really difficult to get to apparently.. I've called him 38 time before without answer, but I've got a good feeling about this time.

Pack your bags for adventure~ (aspirins, shoe polish, wet wipes, sword, shield, ect. You know, the usual).

lol That sounds like fun Puma! *starts packing her bags*

I'm sorry. Hopefully the flu disappears. It's a hell of a thing.

Thanks Mikey.

Well, I lost more weight, as I checked this morning, and I went to the gym and had an alright shift.

Yet I'm still depressed.

Something is wrong. My mood is low and I can't really understand why. Today is Friday, so that's going to help me out in terms of getting some sleep. That's what I've put it down to: lack of sleep. I'm annoyed at myself for letting it get to this stage.

I want to eat chocolate to give myself some happy feelings, but that will undo everything I've done in the last month. I can't do that. I have to find some other way.

Congrats on continuing to lose the weight, that is a hard thing to stick to.
It definitely sounds like the lack of sleep may be causing your low mood. Sleep deprivation can affect so many systems in your body. Everytime you feel like turning to the chocolate for that subsequent release of feel good brain chemicals, just keep reminding yourself that the next day you will feel even worse living with the guilt of going backwards. Hang in there and try making getting more sleep a priority if you can.

 

[Invisibleman]

*Sigh* It would be nice to actually get a job somewhere. Wow and I thought confidence was the key, yet its these reclusive little bitches that are being hired. I walk in and these dorks cant even look me in the eye,I was like "Hey man" and he stares at the floor and utters something akin to a mouse squeak,couldnt even help me find what I was looking for because he couldnt even talk. I mean yeah im reclusive too,but you dont act like that on a f**king job, I can be outgoing when I have to be.

They actually get hired with zero confidence yet when I pass in my resume with confidence I dont even get called for an interview.

Im getting extremely pissed off and losing my patience.

 

[MikeyC]

Congrats on continuing to lose the weight, that is a hard thing to stick to.
It definitely sounds like the lack of sleep may be causing your low mood. Sleep deprivation can affect so many systems in your body. Everytime you feel like turning to the chocolate for that subsequent release of feel good brain chemicals, just keep reminding yourself that the next day you will feel even worse living with the guilt of going backwards. Hang in there and try making getting more sleep a priority if you can.

I don't feel like I'm getting substantially less sleep than normal, though, but I could be. My work schedule assures me that my sleeping is quite precious.

I know. A little chocolate is okay, but it's making sure I stop at that amount. I don't know. I'll figure it out. Thanks for the reply.

 

[Labyrinthine]

Nervous. I'm having surgery tomorrow. It's nothing serious, quite the opposite actually. They're just going in to possibly fix some tears and make sure there is nothing precancerous due to my birth defect. The idea of not being in control due to anesthesia has me in a bit of a panic.<.<

 

[superfluouslyme]

I was planning a trip to Narnia soon, you can come along if you want. If not from life, you can take a vacation from reality. I'm just waiting for Stephen Hawking to call me back about the portal I'm building. Fictional places are really difficult to get to apparently.. I've called him 38 time before without answer, but I've got a good feeling about this time.

Pack your bags for adventure~ (aspirins, shoe polish, wet wipes, sword, shield, ect. You know, the usual).

Can I come as well?

Well, I lost more weight, as I checked this morning, and I went to the gym and had an alright shift.

Yet I'm still depressed.

Something is wrong. My mood is low and I can't really understand why. Today is Friday, so that's going to help me out in terms of getting some sleep. That's what I've put it down to: lack of sleep. I'm annoyed at myself for letting it get to this stage.

I want to eat chocolate to give myself some happy feelings, but that will undo everything I've done in the last month. I can't do that. I have to find some other way.

Congrats on the weight loss. You have a lot more willpower than I do. I started exercising and eating better and I lost some weight, but the moment I become stressed, I'm hitting the chocolate and/or ice cream. So for all the miles I've walked, I think I've actually gained weight.


My sister left for North Carolina about 2 hours ago. So far I'm okay. It probably won't hit me until tomorrow when I wake up and she isn't here and her room is empty and her cat is gone. Then it will just be me and my dad for the foreseeable future.

 

[MikeyC]

Nervous. I'm having surgery tomorrow. It's nothing serious, quite the opposite actually. They're just going in to possibly fix some tears and make sure there is nothing precancerous due to my birth defect. The idea of not being in control due to anesthesia has me in a bit of a panic.<.<

Good luck with the surgery.

Congrats on the weight loss. You have a lot more willpower than I do. I started exercising and eating better and I lost some weight, but the moment I become stressed, I'm hitting the chocolate and/or ice cream. So for all the miles I've walked, I think I've actually gained weight.

Thank you. That was my problem: exercising was okay, but eating healthy was difficult. For the time being I've managed to do both. I know exactly what you mean, though: using food as a safety device/comfort product in the challenging times. I know you can do it, though - because if I can, anyone can.

My sister left for North Carolina about 2 hours ago. So far I'm okay. It probably won't hit me until tomorrow when I wake up and she isn't here and her room is empty and her cat is gone. Then it will just be me and my dad for the foreseeable future.

I'm sorry. Is your dad easy to get along with?

 

[superfluouslyme]

I'm sorry. Is your dad easy to get along with?

For the most part. He's pretty passive aggressive and I don't put up with that ****. My sister told me that my dad told her that some of the things I say to him hurt him. And some of the things he says to me hurt my feelings. But neither of us will acknowledge it because we are stupid. The biggest problem is my own brain. I'd always imagined that I would be living on my own by now. I feel like a massive failure for being 25, still at home, and no job. I do have some prospects, though, and hopefully one will pan out because I'm dying here.

 

[MikeyC]

For the most part. He's pretty passive aggressive and I don't put up with that ****. My sister told me that my dad told her that some of the things I say to him hurt him. And some of the things he says to me hurt my feelings. But neither of us will acknowledge it because we are stupid. The biggest problem is my own brain. I'd always imagined that I would be living on my own by now. I feel like a massive failure for being 25, still at home, and no job. I do have some prospects, though, and hopefully one will pan out because I'm dying here.

Maybe it would be beneficial for you and your dad to clear the air about the stuff you both say. With the two of you living together on your own now, it might be a good way to bond a little more as father and daughter.

I'm 26 and still at home (although I am working), so I am in a similar position to you are. And, like you, I'm dying here. I can fully understand your predicament and I hope this prospect you're talking about comes to fruition because I would like to see you happy and independent.

You're not a massive failure, either. Life doesn't ever go according to plan (this site wouldn't exist if it did), so we must go through alternate avenues. The fact that you're still keen on moving out is a good start and it gives you something to work towards.

 

[Starry]

Nervous. I'm having surgery tomorrow. It's nothing serious, quite the opposite actually. They're just going in to possibly fix some tears and make sure there is nothing precancerous due to my birth defect. The idea of not being in control due to anesthesia has me in a bit of a panic.<.<

Oh dear... I'd be absolutely terrified! But I'm sure everything will be fine. Good luck with it!

***************

Oh so very tired... Woke up during the night... Was awake for well over an hour, then I noticed it was getting lighter... Was awake for goodness knows how long... Then finally got to sleep just after I'd decided to give up trying (always the way *Rolls eyes*)... That's 3 nights in a row with terrible sleep... If I don't get a decent night tonight then I might just crack!

 

[Graeme1988]

F***in' knackered, really tired. Didnae get much sleep - that's insomnia for ya! I'm in a s**tty mood, as a result.

Probably gonnae spend the rest of the day procrastinating, as per usual.

 

[MikeyC]

Starry and Graeme: sounds like neither of you got a lot of sleep. That sucks.

Still feeling a bit meh. Watching some sport and then going to bed.

 

[twiggle]

Teary. I hope just because of PMT.

 

[planemo]

my usual self. apprehensive, conflicted, uncertain, low.