How are you feeling?

Srijita52

Well-known member
^Yep you may not play but you can listen all you want. Six week is hell of a long time but it'll pass. Hang in there.
 

lonely_drummer

Well-known member
Six weeks is a very long time, mate. I can see why you want to get out of there and not having music to fall back on would be very bad. In the meantime you can listen to as much as you want. :)

Yeah I been listening to music 24/7. It just blows cuz 3 days before this happened our bass player just got back from south America and we should be recording our album now but I f u c k e d it all up. Stupid me! I feel so bad for our delay. We were suppose tO play a few festivals too but not now cuz of ME and here come the tears :'(
 

MikeyC

Well-known member
Yeah I been listening to music 24/7. It just blows cuz 3 days before this happened our bass player just got back from south America and we should be recording our album now but I f u c k e d it all up. Stupid me! I feel so bad for our delay. We were suppose tO play a few festivals too but not now cuz of ME and here come the tears :'(
It's not your fault you had a seizure, and I'm sure your bass player understands that. Don't beat yourself up. There's a Bistu album ready to be played if you need it, heh.
 

this_portrait

Well-known member
What could you have done to make them more exciting, though?

Chosen a different school, perhaps?

Srijita52 said:
I've these kind of thoughts too. But unfortunately there's nothing you can do now to make them better, instead concentrate on the years ahead.

Yep, sadly. On a more positive note, though, knowing that the past few years were rather sucky makes me kinda look forward to the coming years. I already got some plans for the near future.
 

this_portrait

Well-known member
Do you really believe a different school would've helped? Maybe it could've been worse. I guess we'll never know.

Maybe, maybe not. Sometimes I think that I would've ended up like this no matter where I went off to. I'm surprised I didn't end up dropping out or failing all my classes. All I can say is that I've felt incredibly out of place here, much more than I did in high school (which is kind of impressive), and the fact that this alienation was because of my personality, rather than for superficial reasons, makes the experience all the more negative.

College definitely won't be missed. Now that I'm nearly 100% out of this social (and to some extent, creative) black hole, I'm free to pursue the things I want and to sort of "start over" (though I use that term very loosely).
 

lonely_drummer

Well-known member
I would greatly appreciate the new bistu album. But I dunno I still feel this all my fault. I didn't just have one, I had three seizures and my injuries r all self inflicted so who else's fault is it??? And I caused a bunch of damage in the house. I ripped out the sink in the bathroom, smashed the mirror with my fists. Then I had the 2nd seizure in the living room where I booted the coffee table across the room, destroying my roommates 700 dollar hookah and smashing a bunch of glasses that were on the table. No matter what I still feel horrible for doing these things
 

MikeyC

Well-known member
Maybe, maybe not. Sometimes I think that I would've ended up like this no matter where I went off to. I'm surprised I didn't end up dropping out or failing all my classes. All I can say is that I've felt incredibly out of place here, much more than I did in high school (which is kind of impressive), and the fact that this alienation was because of my personality, rather than for superficial reasons, makes the experience all the more negative.

College definitely won't be missed. Now that I'm nearly 100% out of this social (and to some extent, creative) black hole, I'm free to pursue the things I want and to sort of "start over" (though I use that term very loosely).
I don't know if a different school would help too much, because you're still you. At least you have future plans to pursue and I do hope they all work out for you. :)

I would greatly appreciate the new bistu album. But I dunno I still feel this all my fault. I didn't just have one, I had three seizures and my injuries r all self inflicted so who else's fault is it??? And I caused a bunch of damage in the house. I ripped out the sink in the bathroom, smashed the mirror with my fists. Then I had the 2nd seizure in the living room where I booted the coffee table across the room, destroying my roommates 700 dollar hookah and smashing a bunch of glasses that were on the table. No matter what I still feel horrible for doing these things
Do you remember doing any of that? I understand your guilt.
 

lonely_drummer

Well-known member
I don't remember a thing :S all I want is for this to never happen again. I can't imagine how terrified my bass player was witnessing me convulsing with my eyes rolling to the back of my head. He was so scared and he doesn't deserve that in the least He's practically my brother and I love him with all my heart and doing that to him is just horrible.
 

MikeyC

Well-known member
I don't remember a thing :S all I want is for this to never happen again. I can't imagine how terrified my bass player was witnessing me convulsing with my eyes rolling to the back of my head. He was so scared and he doesn't deserve that in the least He's practically my brother and I love him with all my heart and doing that to him is just horrible.
I'm sure he knows how you feel.
 

lonely_drummer

Well-known member
Yeah this just blows. I can't apologize enough to him. I'm sure he understands but my own mind just keeps eating away at me. I hate this and I'm sorry to u mikey, I'm just so hard on myself. Thanks for listening mate, ur a good friend
 

MrJones

Well-known member
Awesome.
Went to bed last night, cried for 3 hours and I'm not even sure why, slept 4 hours and now here I am, ready to waste another day.
 

MikeyC

Well-known member
Yeah this just blows. I can't apologize enough to him. I'm sure he understands but my own mind just keeps eating away at me. I hate this and I'm sorry to u mikey, I'm just so hard on myself. Thanks for listening mate, ur a good friend
You're welcome. Your bass player sounds like an epic guy so he'll be an even better friend than I would be. :)

Awesome.
Went to bed last night, cried for 3 hours and I'm not even sure why, slept 4 hours and now here I am, ready to waste another day.
Aw, I'm sorry, Jonesy. What's on your mind?
 

MikeyC

Well-known member
I'm feeling much better than I was a few days ago. I still have a couple of little niggles and concerns but... I don't think there'll ever be a time when I don't. So just need to keep on moving :)
This is great, twiggle. I'm glad you're feeling better. :)
 
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