Hi Everyone. New here.

Firedove

Firedove

New member
Hi everyone. I'm Firedove and I'm new here. Been shy since childhood but this did not really disturb my social life until I reached adolescence. It progressively intensified and developed into a disruptive fear of social situations. I didn't go through adolescence experimenting and being wild like others. I spent my adolescent years being an introvert, being overly self-conscious and feeling inadequate . I kept withdrawing from social interaction until I had 2 or 3 friends. Now I have none. I feel like I skipped the whole adolescence phase and I have failed to acquire basic social skills usually acquired during that phase. Never dated before or even just had a female friend. I'm such a wreck, I've lost hope of having a social life and I only hope to die soon. The S.A.D. Is like an external force which has enslaved me. I've tried hard to reach out and break out of my shell but I can't. Now I'm 23 and in final year at Varsity and still enslaved to this terrible disorder which has sentenced me to a life of isolation, loneliness and misery. S.A.D gave me Avoidant Personality Disorder and together these two give me depression. I'm supposed to be starting a career life but a lonely future as a hermit burdened with S.A.D and loneliness terrifies me more than death. Suicide has crossed my mind many times. Must say I'm amazed how most of your experiences parallel mine. Hope to interact wit u guys n share experiences and ideas.
 
sleeper

sleeper

Member
Did you get diagnosed with avoidant personality disorder or did you come to that conclusion through your own research? I haven't been diagnosed with anything but I wonder if i have some degree of AVPD.

Brian
 
panicsurvivor

panicsurvivor

Well-known member
Welcome, I am pretty new here to, just a couple weeks I think.
This site has helped me quite a bit. I hope it will help you to.
One thing you should feel great about is that you are going to graduate from a university!!!:cool: I know you are having a hard time, but trust me that is something you will be thankful for later.
As far as suicidal thoughts go, I KNOW that everyone on here can empathize and tell you truthfully "yeah I've been there".
So your in good company.:D
 
Bones

Bones

Well-known member
Welcome, I'm new here too, and I'm just about to start Uni and already feel the same as you do so, I know how you feel.
Suicide, just isn't worth it though, It's just a way of screaming to every1 that they've won. Don't give up, and hopefully with some guidance from this site and a little hard work you should overcome it. Try to think of at least one positive attribute of yours every day, and make sure you come up with at least one, even if it's pretty lame like "I have good eyes".
Try not to dwell on any bad things that happen and always think of what you've gained from he experience as opposed to what you've lost (in terms of any embarrassment you think you caused).
Chin UP.


"One of these days the sun will rise and shine only on you, so get ready..."
 
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