hellodarkness
Member
Thank you guys so much
her...
- Thread starter hellodarkness
- Start date
Sacrament
Well-known member
Wait patiently but don't get all needy. Lay your cards on the table: "look, you know I like you, and I'd love to have you as my girlfriend. I'm not gonna push it, and I'm not gonna be persistent with this subject. you know where I am, and you know I can't wait forever. there's a window of opportunity that just opened for the both of us, and I'm willing to go through that window. if you are as well, as I said, you know where I am."
Be cool, confident and assertive about it. Chicks dig that.
Be cool, confident and assertive about it. Chicks dig that.
hellodarkness
Member
dated her for a day then she had a dream of her ex and we broke it off. not sad just dissapointed and a little annoyed. were still friends and she explained that one day in the future we might date which struck as odd to me so i confronted her about it and asked if she just wanted me to keep hope tovstay around a little longer she replied no and so now im back in my paranoia state.... any ideas?
hellodarkness
Member
exactly what i was thinking i will put her feelings above my own. and thank you again
Scorpiiious
Active member
Stop thinking what you want and give her some space. Come on she just broke up from her last relationship. Don't be pushy.. she needs some time to herself.
Time will tell when she is ready to date again.
Time will tell when she is ready to date again.
GraybeardGhost
Well-known member
She's just gone through a breakup, and that always leaves a wound. Some people in her situation will take some time off to allow that wound to heal, but others—men and women alike—will just slap a Band-Aid on it and charge back into the game. I'm sure you know what happens to Band-Aids when they're no longer needed. It sounds as if this girl, even in her apparent confusion, has the sense to give herself the time she needs to heal. You'd do well to do the same. Ask yourself this: do you want to be a boyfriend or a Band-Aid?
I'm not suggesting that you stay away entirely. On the contrary, be there for her, but as a friend, not a suitor. Hang out, do stuff together—if she's willing, of course—but keep it casual, no pressure, and never use the word date. Show her that you understand and respect her needs. Try to be patient, however hard that might be. In time, you may become more than friends, but even if that doesn't happen, at least you'll still have her in your life, and you'll always know that she liked and respected you enough not to use you as a short-term fix and then toss you away.
I'm not suggesting that you stay away entirely. On the contrary, be there for her, but as a friend, not a suitor. Hang out, do stuff together—if she's willing, of course—but keep it casual, no pressure, and never use the word date. Show her that you understand and respect her needs. Try to be patient, however hard that might be. In time, you may become more than friends, but even if that doesn't happen, at least you'll still have her in your life, and you'll always know that she liked and respected you enough not to use you as a short-term fix and then toss you away.
hellodarkness
Member
Things will be going back to usual for me because her first ex dusty who she still cares about but has emotional problems about wants to get back together with her.. she said wait till after i graduate then well see where i stand. - her quote. This is sort of a problem for me in two ways the first is obvious being my feelings toward her... second being he is controlling and when they were together she wasnt aloud to talk to me or any other guys but me especially... he hates me and i mean that.. so if they get together im afraid things will go back the way they were and me not even get to talk to her anymore.... any ideas opinions always welcome. Thank you socialphobiaworld whenever i need a second opinion your here for me thankyou...
hellodarkness
Member
shes already decided so i wished her luck... regardless of what i say she wont listen to me about this so its time to stay on the sideline stay around to help her through the pain shell go through but also move on
hellodarkness
Member
i already tried that....
A Many Splendored Thing
Well-known member
Instead of being a band-aid, why not be the doctor?
Ask her out as a friend. Try to have a good time without any tension between you two over what has happened. Don't bring up anything relating to relationships; she might just dwell on either her bf. Be sure you go to a place she will like, even if you don't care for it; after all, even friends should do that for one another.
Be there for her. If she really is attracted to you, she will let you know with body language. Missing that first kiss moment can be a real bummer, but you have to be sure, better to be safe than sorry on that one with the state she is in right now.
The ones that wait too long will get cut in front of. You have to be assertive, just not abusive to her heart.
I think leaving her alone is the worst thing you can do. I don't know what goes through a woman's mind at this time exactly, but I would bet she wants somebody to cheer her up. If that's not you, you missed your chance.
Nice guys finish last because a woman doesn't want to settle for just a nice guy. She wants a man that cares for her.
Ask her out as a friend. Try to have a good time without any tension between you two over what has happened. Don't bring up anything relating to relationships; she might just dwell on either her bf. Be sure you go to a place she will like, even if you don't care for it; after all, even friends should do that for one another.
Be there for her. If she really is attracted to you, she will let you know with body language. Missing that first kiss moment can be a real bummer, but you have to be sure, better to be safe than sorry on that one with the state she is in right now.
The ones that wait too long will get cut in front of. You have to be assertive, just not abusive to her heart.
I think leaving her alone is the worst thing you can do. I don't know what goes through a woman's mind at this time exactly, but I would bet she wants somebody to cheer her up. If that's not you, you missed your chance.
Nice guys finish last because a woman doesn't want to settle for just a nice guy. She wants a man that cares for her.
hellodarkness, she just broke up and you move in? Bold.
Way too soon.
Be a friend and be there when she needs a friend.
Now, go do what you do and make things happen for you. Don't be caught in the net of whether to stay or move forward. Lots of people lots of things to do. Have fun times.
Way too soon.
Be a friend and be there when she needs a friend.
Now, go do what you do and make things happen for you. Don't be caught in the net of whether to stay or move forward. Lots of people lots of things to do. Have fun times.
hellodarkness
Member
im movibg on because she went back to her abusive ex im still her friend but im moving on emotionally
mikebird
Banned
Well
my one gave up after I bought us a new mortgaged home, for our investment, after living around some big shared rented houses, for years. I had marriage on my mind. We celebrated New Year's 2000! Like every year before. New home in July 2001. Less to celebrate
She thought it was too small for her, and it was all just for me. She didn't get the point of investment, and continuing to better. Bedroom for two, kitchen, bathroom, hall, living room. She said I shoulda got a bigger one. That comes later, when you have a partner, to be in the right mood in the office.
Then she married another friend, with kid
My feelings seem to show, when I find new partners. They don't stay forever
Within a year, my office people saw the dramatic change in me. The time when my life first ever collapsed through the floor. A time to go and speak to Samaritans - never thought that would happen.
Ever since after redundancy, nothing ever flourished.
hellodarkness
cling on to her, or anyone else. Don't let it happen
my one gave up after I bought us a new mortgaged home, for our investment, after living around some big shared rented houses, for years. I had marriage on my mind. We celebrated New Year's 2000! Like every year before. New home in July 2001. Less to celebrate
She thought it was too small for her, and it was all just for me. She didn't get the point of investment, and continuing to better. Bedroom for two, kitchen, bathroom, hall, living room. She said I shoulda got a bigger one. That comes later, when you have a partner, to be in the right mood in the office.
Then she married another friend, with kid
My feelings seem to show, when I find new partners. They don't stay forever
Within a year, my office people saw the dramatic change in me. The time when my life first ever collapsed through the floor. A time to go and speak to Samaritans - never thought that would happen.
Ever since after redundancy, nothing ever flourished.
hellodarkness
cling on to her, or anyone else. Don't let it happen