NothingElseMatters
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Dont You Hate It When "Normal" People Complain?
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Sinar_Matahari
Well-known member
Perhaps it will help you if you realize that there are all sorts of problems other than social anxiety. I understand how you feel though. No one in this world is problem-free though.
timidhorse
Well-known member
I agree, sometimes people take things for granted, just look at the movie "Cast Away". If only I had a fire starter. 
Please excuse my english, as it is not my maternal language. You shouldn't look at it that way, in my opinion it is quite the opposite. You should look at all those people who are severly handicapped, who have lost some of their limbs and are still living without complaining. At all those people who live alone without a family that need to support themselves. There are always some people at a worst condition then yours, and you should thank god for the things that you do have. Not to look at you naighbour's grass and say hey it's greener then mine! he has no right to complain.
I have severe SP as well but I try to overlook it.
I have severe SP as well but I try to overlook it.
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Cal
Well-known member
We're all human beings and all have the right to voice our opinions and frustration. It shouldn't matter whether we're normal or not, or how bad the problem is. So if YOU find other people's whining overbearing, you should ignore it or walk away, it's as simple as that.
I'm not saying I don't find excessive whining to be annoying, but I just don't let it get to me.
People really should try to be more grateful for what they've got, but it's not going to happen (we're only human after all). Besides, that's just the polite way of telling you to get over it, I highly doubt your mother considers those things when something is bothering her. But what do I know anyway.
I'm not saying I don't find excessive whining to be annoying, but I just don't let it get to me.
People really should try to be more grateful for what they've got, but it's not going to happen (we're only human after all). Besides, that's just the polite way of telling you to get over it, I highly doubt your mother considers those things when something is bothering her. But what do I know anyway.
scarletlee
Well-known member
No not at all. I think everyone has problems to deal with. There is a lot of suffering in this world, some people have nothing to eat, others are on their death bed saying their final goodbyes to the people that are closest to them. People are dealing with loss, disease and abuse. The list could go on and on. Life can be hard but I would never think that everyone else has it easy although sometimes it seems that way it’s not reality. If we don't try and understand other peoples problems how can we expect others to try and understand ours?
PennyLane
Well-known member
I completely agree...you never know the things that are going on in other peoples lives and they may well be worse off than you...without you even realising. Even if they are not..they're problems are still valid and important to them.
To the outside world i probably seem like a young, (fairly) attractive, middle class girl, who travels and is finishing her degree...and my life looks pretty damn good if you guys met me on the street.. unless your one of the few i share with about how terribly insecure, lonely and terrified of speaking i am! Im sure there are others hiding secrets too...so it always worth giving people the benefit of the doubt!
To the outside world i probably seem like a young, (fairly) attractive, middle class girl, who travels and is finishing her degree...and my life looks pretty damn good if you guys met me on the street.. unless your one of the few i share with about how terribly insecure, lonely and terrified of speaking i am! Im sure there are others hiding secrets too...so it always worth giving people the benefit of the doubt!
Cal
Well-known member
In accordance with my last post, it isn't like normal people are the only ones who complain about small things. I don't think it's right to single them out, it should be about all people in general.
Also, I think the public perception of what's normal is a bit distorted. To me, normal is defined: 'ordinary and usual', and that's just plain boring. I don't see why so many people are jealous/envious of them in that case, I prefer things that are interesting.
Also, I think the public perception of what's normal is a bit distorted. To me, normal is defined: 'ordinary and usual', and that's just plain boring. I don't see why so many people are jealous/envious of them in that case, I prefer things that are interesting.
Actually, I am fine with it, because I understand people do have problems, with or without SA. What I can't stand is when a person who obviously has a great life, eg. great looks, loads of friends/gfs/bfs, great school grades/jobs, lots of parties to go to/invitations and still complain endlessly. And I have seen such people in my life, I knew a girl who complained she couldn't find a half decent bf when within the year, more than 10 boys have shown an interest in her, and that's excluding crushes or secret admirers we do not know who are interested in her, and she complains endlessly about her single status when she could have picked anyone from the 11 or so boys, but she could find something to say about all the boys, and why she could not accept any of them And oh, those boys were only those we counted we were in the same school as us, excluding other boys who might have liked her from outside of school.
And oh, those boys were only those we counted we were in the same school as us, excluding other boys who might have liked her from outside of school.
Sinar_Matahari
Well-known member
We're really not that much different from "normal" people. If we keep thinking of ourselves as abnormal it's only natural that we isolate ourselves and give off the vibe that we're not normal. We have negative ways of thinking about the world and about ourselves, but we're not diseased, we're not aliens. We have emotions just like every other "normal" person. I can understand if one says that people with ASPD are abnormal but not people with SA.
Sinar_Matahari
Well-known member
I knew a girl who complained she couldn't find a half decent bf when within the year, more than 10 boys have shown an interest in her, and that's excluding crushes or secret admirers we do not know who are interested in her, and she complains endlessly about her single status when she could have picked anyone from the 11 or so boys, but she could find something to say about all the boys, and why she could not accept any of them
I have met many guys who have been interested in me. That doesn't mean that I have to choose any of them just to not be single. There are people whom I am not compatible with whom may be attracted to me only because of my looks and I don't want to be with someone who may think that all will be fine as long as they have a pretty girlfriend. I wouldn't even expect a guy that I was interested in to be interested right back. It is possible for someone to not feel any attraction towards a person who is attracted to them.
People do have to be wise when it comes to choosing a partner. Sometimes it takes a lot to find that person who is right for you. I have never truly found that I can be myself around any other man (in a relationship) other than my husband. Also, my girlfriends and I agree that we become more picky as we become older. We've made our mistakes and we've learned our lessons. I had a friend who would date anyone who asked her out. That's just idiotic and it comes across as desperate.
If I had not been choosy, I would have already ended up with a couple of abusive (physically) men. I know this because they've been abusive and controlling with the women they've dated and the women that they are with at the moment. If I don't get a good vibe from someone, then I don't care if they're interested in me. I've had one boyfriend who was verbally abusive and one who was domineering. This is one reason why men and women can't just pick any person for the sake of not being single.
Lonelykitsune
Well-known member
the thing is,we have all the stuff they worry about as well as SA interfering with those problems too so we have double the worries
Anubis
Well-known member
The concept of "ungratefulness" pervades all of humanity. Even us social-phobes. I'm willing to bet that you live in a carpeted home with windows, ceiling, kitchen and a heating system. Guess what? The vast majority of humans on THIS earth are missing those aspects in their day-to-day lives:
80% of the World's Inhabitants Own <%20 of the World's Resources
So I'm sure if you asked them about you, they'd be like "I hate it when NORMAL people with food, shelter, and proper clothing complain about looking stupid in front of others when I can barely feed my kids", lol.
Like I said though, ungratefulness is a problem that pervades all of humanity. It's hard to not compare yourself to those who are better off, rather than those who are less fortunate. The previous fosters greed and miserableness (albeit with a HUGE ego boost if you can one-up someone) while the latter gives you gratitude and passion to live (but requires you to be less attached to personal gain). The choice is tough because each side has it's advantages. But only the latter has a long-lasting effect on happiness.
80% of the World's Inhabitants Own <%20 of the World's Resources
So I'm sure if you asked them about you, they'd be like "I hate it when NORMAL people with food, shelter, and proper clothing complain about looking stupid in front of others when I can barely feed my kids", lol.
Like I said though, ungratefulness is a problem that pervades all of humanity. It's hard to not compare yourself to those who are better off, rather than those who are less fortunate. The previous fosters greed and miserableness (albeit with a HUGE ego boost if you can one-up someone) while the latter gives you gratitude and passion to live (but requires you to be less attached to personal gain). The choice is tough because each side has it's advantages. But only the latter has a long-lasting effect on happiness.
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Jake123
Banned
tired_of_starting_again
Well-known member
We always want what we don't/can't have, it's only natural.
And yeah I get tired of people complaining about all their different friends or their friends at work, or actually I am just genreally jealous of anyone with friends or a job.
I get sick of hearing people talk about not even neccesarily friends, but just people they know at work & stuff.
Why is it so easy for them?
And yeah I get tired of people complaining about all their different friends or their friends at work, or actually I am just genreally jealous of anyone with friends or a job.
I get sick of hearing people talk about not even neccesarily friends, but just people they know at work & stuff.
Why is it so easy for them?
This is so true and I feel like this all the time. I even (evily) have impulses to think this way about some folks on this site with less intense SA. But, I remind myself of how BAD IT COULD BE. Some people have SA that is disastrous beyond anything I can imagine. My life compared to theirs has been a fairytale. I will allways remember this. Also, some folks have panic, extreme ocd, or even severe personality disorders. These people are far more forlorn than any of us...After spending time in panic/anxiety chat rooms I can safely say that some people would do anything to trade places with ME. Who would have thought it?
So guys, although i'd trade places with some of you, and some would trade places with me, we have to remember that allthough it's SUPER ANNOYING when people better off complain ignorantly, how much worse it could really be for YOU and I.
So guys, although i'd trade places with some of you, and some would trade places with me, we have to remember that allthough it's SUPER ANNOYING when people better off complain ignorantly, how much worse it could really be for YOU and I.