Does this make me ugly?

[alex8609]

I've been having these bad feelings lately because I feel like no matter how hard I try to be nice to everybody that no one likes me. I'm a guy and when I was little, lots of guys use to make fun of me and would often bully me so I always thought they were better than me. I'm glad that happened now, because I know that I would never treat anyone else like that and I think it made me more compassionate towards others.

But it feels people are still looking over me or picking on me. The guys would also tell me that I was ugly but everyone else told me I wasnt but now I'm starting to believe that I am ugly because I was bullied. I have lots of black hair and green eyes so maybe I can seem ugly but I don't feel I like it because I like the way I look. Does being bullied make you a bad person or lower than the ones who bullied you?

 

[FOR REAL]

you ask anyone who isnt a bully!
they are the lower people, not you

 

[coooool]

black hair and green eyes? thats rare and kinda cool

 

[AlleyCat]

Does being bullied make you a bad person or lower than the ones who bullied you?

No, definitely not, quite the opposite. Anyone who stoops to the level of bullying another person is usually driven by their own fears and insecurites. They have to knock someone else down to make themselves feel better. I don't see anything ugly about someone with black hair and green eyes. That sounds like a beautiful combination to me.

 

[Kinetik]

Attractiveness is in the eye of the beholder. It's subjective by definition and everyone has a different type. That's part of the beauty of life. If you want to know real irony, the girl I'm currently dating once told me I'm "ugly as shit" (and I quote).

 

[CoyoteX]

You have to understand why people bully, it's out of insecurity. Only those who need to put others down, feel down about themselves. I think you just need to shrug it off as nonesense, as it is. How old are you by the way? If you don't mind me asking. It may have to do with your age group too. And yes, beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder. You can't please everyone, and you will never be 'attractive' to everyone. Nuff said.

 

[PennyLane]

Green eyes are gorgeous!!!!
They are probably bullying you because you are unique and dont look like everyone else not because you are ugly at all.
These people are actually enjoying causing another person pain...how can they possibly be better than you? Anyone who tries to make another suffer is clearly not a good person.
Please never think about what these people have told you again

 

[klytus]

Please never think about what these people have told you again

Good advice, though, it's easier said than done. I know from personal experience that you can't stop thinking about it, even years after the bullying. I still shun certain situations and activities because of the unpleasant related memories.

 

[Flowers-Of-Bloom]

Black hair, green eyes, bullied during youth... are you Harry Potter?

Funny!

I have lots of black hair and green eyes so maybe I can seem ugly but I don't feel I like it because I like the way I look.

First of all; if you enjoy the way you look, even after all these bullying experiences targeted at your physical attractiveness, then you are probably NOT ugly. When being bullied, they may get creative and breed little lies in any way to belittle you, even if these insults are far from truth.
The pressure from outside entities may be motivated according to the manner in which you present yourself. Frustrated males generally find some kind of emotional release from picking out those who appear to be socially and physically weaker than them. But I've never met you, so of course I can't pin-point their incentive to target you exclusively.

Does being bullied make you a bad person or lower than the ones who bullied you?

No.

 

[Sinar_Matahari]

First, green eyes and black hair is a beautiful combination. I used to be called ugly growing up. By my mother, brother and other kids. I really grew up thinking that I was ugly. I still have my days although I'm mostly happy with what I have.

I don't think that being bullied makes someone a bad person or makes them inferior to the people who are doing the bullying.

 

[alex8609]

Lol, no I'm not Harry Potter. My hair is way darker than his and grows ridiculously fast and my eyes are greenish brown. In light they can look green but in the shade they look brown.

Actually we just graduated high school and now I'm studying Fine Arts but I'm afraid that everyone else I'll meet will be like them since they've been bullying me from 1st grade - 11th grade. But like I said I'm glad it happened because I know I'll never be anything like them or treat anyone else the same.
They tried to get me to join their little group once, but I turned them down and told them to shove it! XD

 

[SingleAloneForever]

Nope, definitely doesn't sound ugly to me, far from it in fact. Generally, what I like to believe is that everybody is beautiful in their own way. (Actually that's not strictly true. I don't believe that it applies to myself, but that's another story and completely off topic.

The term ugly is all too often callously thrown around by people, such as bullies, only against others that IMO, bullies are afraid of, or feel intimidated by. As others have said, a bully is nothing more than a coward, who feels they need to treat others in this way, in order to feel better about their own insecurities and weaknesses.

I wouldn't sweat it too much, you'll find that after High School, at College you'll find people of decent maturity, with similiar interests to yourself. You'll easily make new friends.

Don't worry about your hair growing fast, mine does the same. Hey, at least we won't go bald.

 

[limetree]

I like to believe is that everybody is beautiful in their own way.

True, we're all bitches if we don't believe it.

 

[Cynic]

Does being bullied make you a bad person or lower than the ones who bullied you?

Obviouslly.

 

[jmroszczak]

when someone deliberately tries to make another person feel bad about the way they look or act..its because they(the bully) are really insecure with them self...so they need to do this too assure them self that they are not...fill in the blank

 

[katrinka]

Being shy or being bullied because of it does not make you ugly! Let’s get that straight.

Bullies bully in an attempt to display power over others; they put you down before you can put them down, they try to establish who you are/your status among your peers before you can, and their interactions with others are self-serving. The things they say have nothing to do with you, personally, but with how it benefits them – they’re scared to death of being at the bottom of the heap – but to people like us, who value kindness, they are at the bottom of the heap!

If you consider the opinions of others about yourself more than your own, you become the perfect target for bullying. Unfortunately the worst bullying usually happens at a very uncertain time in your life; when you’re trying to figure out who you are exactly, and the bullying can easily have long-term affects on the way you see yourself.

All you need to know is that you like yourself, and that you are kind and compassionate toward others. If anyone has anything negative to say about that, then they’re obviously the one with the problem!

 

[lonelywolf]

i dye mt hair black sometimes to make me feel better i dont know whats wrong with green eyes i have them and thats one thing about me i do like

 

[TimArends]

It sounds like, now that you are older, at least you're no longer bullied anymore, because you speak of that as being in the past. They probably bullied you because you were quiet, not because of your appearance. They only took that as something because it was The easiest thing to bully someone about. Never led bullies know they bother you. That only encourages them laugh it off and move on. Also, try not to worry or even think about them anymore. If they are the enemy, why invite them into your life? Why let them into your head, swirl around In your mind, and cause you grief? The less you think about them, the better.

 

[Bexi]

I'm not sure how you equate being bullied with being a bad person, bullies are the bad ones

 

[anxiousnut]

As a woman, black hair and green eyes sounds very attractive...i have green eyes too, and I think it's very unique and awesome!