Do you think bullying is a natural thing?

[takethislife]

Struggle for survival happens in nature all the time. Only the fittest survive. It's the same in the human world. I'm staring to believe that bullying is a part of natural selection.
The ones who are not able to defend themselves wont be able to survive. They will become extinct. Tell me it's different with humans. You often hear that teens who commit suicide have been bullied. If they don't kill themselves they'll become extinct anyway because they simply wont reproduce. People who are bullied are not exactly a catch are they? What girl wants a guy who can't defend her (or even himself)???
Even if I had a chance, I dunno if I'd want to reproduce. What kind of person would I raise??? How the hell would I teach him to survive when I'm incapable of doing so myself? Besides I wouldn't want to ruin someone by passing on my genes in the first place.
Tell me I'm wrong.

 

[AGR]

Yes,what more is than an act of dominance?
And I think everyone did a bit themselves at some point in their lifes.

 

[veronica]

It is maybe a natural thing to eliminate everyone, who is not "normal" - but being normal in this case means being average, not outstanding in any way. The consequence is that a lot of very smart, dedicated, talented, creative, good looking, sensitive or strong individuals are bullied (because they are seen as a threat to group harmony). I think the nature can be wrong sometimes and that if you were/are bullied doesn't automatically mean that you have bad genes and that you are not meant to be reproducing... ::

"Not be able to defend yourself" is just one aspect of your personality, not the whole you and does not entirely depend on your genes (the environment in which you were brought up also plays a big role)... I see this defenselessness as a part of communication skills, which are just skills - skills can be trained, improved...

I hope you understood what i was trying to say... (English is not my mother tongue, i probably made some mistakes...)::

 

[Luke1993]

Damn you are right, I'm one of these people you have described, the ones who cannot defend themselves and won't have kids. I hate natural selection.

 

[takethislife]

It is maybe a natural thing to eliminate everyone, who is not "normal" - but being normal in this case means being average, not outstanding in any way. The consequence is that a lot of very smart, dedicated, talented, creative, good looking, sensitive or strong individuals are bullied (because they are seen as a threat to group harmony). I think the nature can be wrong sometimes and that if you were/are bullied doesn't automatically mean that you have bad genes and that you are not meant to be reproducing... ::

"Not be able to defend yourself" is just one aspect of your personality, not the whole you and does not entirely depend on your genes (the environment in which you were brought up also plays a big role)... I see this defenselessness as a part of communication skills, which are just skills - skills can be trained, improved...

I hope you understood what i was trying to say... (English is not my mother tongue, i probably made some mistakes...)::

I see your point. But i wouldn't say people get bullied because they're different (primarily). They get bullied because they are W E A K. You can be a complete weirdo and if you can defend yourself you'll be fine. You can be just like everyone else except the fact you're weak and you'll be bullied.
And for that u said "is just one aspect of your personality" - yeah it is just one aspect - but it's one of the most important, if not the most important aspect without which you wont make it.

Damn you are right, I'm one of these people you have described, the ones who cannot defend themselves and won't have kids. I hate natural selection.

That makes the two of us. Hi 5. *5*

 

[Kiwong]

I look at most of the bullies from high school, poor grades, in trouble with teachers and police, dropped out of school early, maybe ended up in jail. They were violent and made school hell for other kids, but I think in this world of qualifications to get well paid jobs they would be selected against. In comparison to the bullies I think I have done pretty well.

I don't think there is too much wrong with my genes, my parents gave me some great gifts. Shyness and sensitivity aren't bad qualities.

 

[AGR]

.

I don't think there is too much wrong with my genes, my parents gave me some great gifts. Shyness and sensitivity aren't bad qualities.

you are right I also dont think there is anything wrong with my genes,its not necesarily the "best" ones who are successful but the ones who can adapt to their environment,I doubt I will ever have children.

 

[coyote]

i was bullied as a kid - but I managed to go on and have a full life in spite of it

i even managed to procreate

I'm not sure I can say the same thing about all the people who bullied me

there's no telling where they ended up

a bullying jerk isn't necessarily the fittest

perhaps the person who survives the bullying and moves beyond it is the fittest

 

[Honda]

Natural selection dictates that the survival is for the fittest. Not the smartest or the toughest.. Just the fittest..

So if you are in an envinroment like school, the person that feels hard or impossible to mess with (not necessarily a bully) is the fittest. As he gets what he wants, females are attracted to his power and he doesnt let anyone stand in his way.. This is an alpha male.. And this does not mean he's an ******* or a bully rather noble which makes him more of an alpha male..

Survival is for the fittest and things can change any moment... Some people in my school where bullied to the fullest, now some of them have a good life, they look athletic and heck they get laid quite often.. I wish i got the presistence to get over my problems as much as they did..

THIS IS LIFE... The person with the weakest social skills will find it hard to live and adapt to society, nevertheless, if he/she is presistent they will work and they will survive and suceed..

 

[dyingtolive]

sometimes it is for the best, to make us strong. its a way of nature to give us a wake up call.

unluckily, when ur children, its more fragile, we dont have tools and and it can leave deep wounds.

as an adult, when people "bully" me, thats how i see it, a wake up call. Now i have more tools, and it can give courage. Even anger can draw courage.

Power is a very real and important thing

Bullying is definitely a natural thing. Now at 28, i may not confront people who show a bully attitude to me, but im not going to roll over either. I stand my ground.

 

[Carol]

Your experience in school (or general childhood) does NOT have to determine who you will be for the rest of your life.

I often think that if I could take some kind of memory-erasing medication, that would erase the painful memories of rejection and implant new memories of being accepted by everyone, I would be a much more likeable person. So much of social anxiety is self-fulfilling prophecy. Something happens to give us the idea that we're social failures, we become anxious about social situations, and BECAUSE WE FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE, we act in ways that cause more rejection (by withdrawing, not smiling or making eye-contact, or in some cases overcompensating and acting like a clown) and thus we experience more social anxiety. If we didn't believe we'd be rejected, we often wouldn't be. We get what we expect to get.

Past failures only determine our futures IF WE LET THEM. Social anxiety is so self-defeating.

As for whether bullying is natural or not... I wouldn't call it "natural," but it certainly happens a lot, so it is (unfortunately) "normal." But don't let that keep you down!! You hurt yourself more than the bullies do if you give up. They may have had power over you for a moment, but they don't have power over the rest of your life unless you give it to them.

 

[Glumlock]

I agree with Carol - experience in school will usually do one or two things to you, and either way it equips you for later life.

It does this either by building up a huge ego for you, which will eventually be brought down by the real world, forcing the weak to crack up and develop mental illness and the strong to recover and grow stronger, or by punishing your every move, breaking your confidence down and forcing you to repair it over time. You'll enter adulthood stronger for it - and you will have a lot more about you than someone whose "easy time" at school was probably riddled with lots of underlying childhood issues

 

[JamesSmith]

Bullying is natural not only for humans, but for many other animals as well. It's a way to show superiority and establish dominance over someone.

Like someone said before, it's also a choice of poor morals to bully someone in most cases, unless of course they started the whole thing by bullying you.

 

[userremoved]

What kind of person would I raise??? How the hell would I teach him to survive when I'm incapable of doing so myself? Besides I wouldn't want to ruin someone by passing on my genes in the first place. Tell me I'm wrong.

You don't need to teach your kid how to fight, just pay some other person to do that for you. There's plenty of karate schools out there.

As for bullies, those people are screwed in the head. I wouldn't consider them a step up in the genes department.

 

[Honda]

Its important to teach an individual to be good in the following:
1. Self Defense/ Physical fitness and strength
2. Social Skills/ PR

Work, career, degree will never matter if you dont have these skills and abilities to a basic extent.. They are the ones that keep you surviving..

 

[Shant]

I have a counter-argument - perhaps in the animal kingdom, bullying is a natural thing. Am I going to say humans are "different" than animals? No, but all of the progress we have made thus far in the world - technology, for example - was completed with humanity in mind. We have an ability for reasoning with each other (or at least I'd like to think we technically have that, whether we all use it or not is doubtful though) - whether other animals do or not is something we can't prove. But we can prove that we have this ability among us and that all of our advances come with assuming we are "different" and can advance.

Therefore, I don't think bullying has to be a natural thing. Maybe if we weren't human, we wouldn't even be speaking about this (assuming we could speak anyways). But because of all the things we as humans have been proven to do, I would reject the notion of natural selection, survival of the fittest, etc... in terms of humanity. We are essentially above it, the worlds' colonies, states, countries, etc... were drawn by us. We're not above "animals" or anything, but I'm more than sure we have the capability to understand certain things. Bullying may be natural at this point in time, but does not have to be.

 

[Honda]

Its part of our daily lives and if we dont fight for our place in life then evil people or bullies will take advantage of your weakness... This is the truth unfortunately... The strong feed on the poor... The difference between us and animals is we have advanced brains to question and calculate things which makes the sky a limit for humanity but nevertheless we are still driven, like animals, by our insticts to survive, mate and feed..

Maybe times will change and society oneday will mark bullying as a horrible and forbidden thing.. but the insticts are there and they will always find their way into a person..

 

[hippiechild]

Yes it's natural, but not by any means acceptable or inevitable.
There are a lot of things that are natural, which, for the good of society, we've learned to channel into symbolic social outlets or repress entirely.

Infanticide, rape, polygamy, the role of touch in relating to others, hunting and meaning of self-sufficiency... all, whether for better or worse, have been removed or superseded by contemporary equivalents.

 

[dottie]

well said, hippiechild.

 

[Honda]

Well said...

My boxing trainer, he's a really nice guy.. He was telling a story of how 5 guys attacked him in school thinking he's an easy target and he was training in karate since he's 2... They wanted to mess with him thinking he's an easy target so they approached him and he confronted all 5 of them... They hardly were able to get to him... He beat some of them really bad... The next day, everybody gave him respect in school and people he never knew wanted to be friends with him... School is the real world with less complications... This is the world we live in... Natural Selection and Survival of the fittest whether they're a bully or not... Violence is part or life, bad things are part of life whether you like it or not, its sad but true...

I'd want to teach this to my kids and ill take them to training at a young age in the future.