Do you honestly push your self as hard as you can to beat sa?
- Thread starter kuze
- Start date
just wanna b normal
Well-known member
yes i do! cuzz i hate my SA so much. its killing me! metaphorically speaking. but yes stress & worrys is exactly how we got to anxiety in the first place.
EscapeArtist
Well-known member
No i've not been pushing myself AT ALL for a whole month! I know what you mean about the stressful days, being worse than you know you "should" (that's a bad word..). I've just been stuck in a depressive rut that seems to have sucked all energy to heal from me. Bad habits are definitely reappearing
MollyBeGood
Well-known member
I can honestly say that I don't push myself enough. But I have such good excuses. yep.
Yeah, I am going to have to make some really big changes soon and of coarse I am anxious, really bad actually, but they are for my own good and I am excited too so I just have to do a little everyday towards these goals I have to do better and when you say you're a wreck, I know this feeling all to well. you can't let that stop you from what you want in the bigger picture out of your life. Trying writing, drawing painting whatever to express some of these thoughts and feelings that cripple you and maybe they will loose their power over you, so you can feel better.
I am lucky I have a great friend to talk to and he helps me with my goals which I have never in my life.. had any real support. I think everyone needs help along the way.
Falkor
1
Like you, I also have my good days, like I'm more pushing myself to beat sa, but sometimes I'm just like giving up. I know I don't push myself hard enough, and my mind tells me like, I should do that more. So I will, eventually, just takes time . I hope someday I can truly overcome sa, and tell the people i'm fine
. I hope someday I can truly overcome sa, and tell the people i'm fine 
awkwardamanda
Well-known member
I sure as hell don't. I'm depressed and unmotivated to do anything productive. And I'm pretty damn stubborn and pessimistic.
Um, yeah that too.
Um, yeah that too.
I don't think pushing hard is all that it's made to be... when I tried to push hard I went ill.. So I think it's important to strike a balance... I seem to need a day 'off' between trips or meeting people or social events or such.. I theoretically 'could' push myself more, but then I'd get ill and defeat the purpose.. So I'm trying to figure our my optimal ways of functioning, not too overwhelmed or underwhelmed...
Of course there's room for improvement everywhere too... Sometimes I just need to get fed up with something and get people together or do things etc. (Very embarassed about it and such, on the other hand some experiences that I needed to be 'pushed' to have been very good!!)
Of course there's room for improvement everywhere too... Sometimes I just need to get fed up with something and get people together or do things etc. (Very embarassed about it and such, on the other hand some experiences that I needed to be 'pushed' to have been very good!!
)
petrified eyes
Well-known member
I push myself, but it's more like a nudge. I'd rather do it slowly and beat it a step at a time rather than try to fix it as fast as I can only to have a relapse because I didn't do it right. If it takes years to beat, so be it.
Having several small victories that stay is more rewarding to me than having a large victory that falls apart.
Having several small victories that stay is more rewarding to me than having a large victory that falls apart.
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vj288
not actually Fiona Apple
I have before and know I can, but most of the time it's that ^^.
I guess I know what "should" be doing, with AvPD and just life in general. Like right now I should be eating and then go study. I know I should be sleeping when I'm up late, usually on here. And I know I should be out and about, at least trying to do things. Even it's a simple walk, or reading in a public place. I'm lazy though, it's easier to not do these things. I'm what you could call a planner, I say "this is what I need to do" and then when I don't "this is what I have to do to fix not doing that."
I know that if I want to push as hard as I can I either have to dramatically decrease my time on this site (which is very difficult when you're sleep deprived and in front of a screen all day, makes it very difficult to think straight and make the right decisions ) or get myself permanently banned, something I really don't want to do, but may happen eventually if I continue to abuse this tool.
Sleeping, eating right, exercising, having a clear head - these are all things I know how to do, and without them I know improving is much more difficult, almost impossible.
EscapeArtist
Well-known member
Vj^ Huge trick I learned from the book "Too Perfect" Is realizing that a lot of your SHOULDS are really WANTS. For instance, you could say "I really should go to bed" or you can say "I really want to be rested tomorrow". If you realize that some of your shoulds are not wants, then they are most likely for other people and not yourself, unless there is something you, in the long term, are WANTING to receive from it.
If you tell yourself, I should go on a run...... versus, I want to go on a run, feel the wind or the endorphins, then you don't feel like it's an expectation. And if you really don't want to, there is less pressure. Truly there is nothing that you "should" be doing
Try to exclude "should" and "need to" from your thinking, or self-talk, and instead use want. This really helped me at one point in my life. It becomes a way of doing things for yourself and not others, and well, that's a huge benefit as well
If you tell yourself, I should go on a run...... versus, I want to go on a run, feel the wind or the endorphins, then you don't feel like it's an expectation. And if you really don't want to, there is less pressure. Truly there is nothing that you "should" be doing
Try to exclude "should" and "need to" from your thinking, or self-talk, and instead use want. This really helped me at one point in my life. It becomes a way of doing things for yourself and not others, and well, that's a huge benefit as well
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vj288
not actually Fiona Apple
That's a good explanation, I put the should in "" because I didn't exactly mean it that way, but I also think it's more then a want. I want to go to bed so I can be well rested, but I also want to stay up and chat with people or whatever. If I'm in the chatbox, for example, my want to stay up will over ride my want to go to sleep. Technically speaking, I never have to go to bed until I pass out from exhaustion, but more realistically at a certain point my want to sleep will become stronger than my want to stay up.
By should I think I meant "what's best for me," or at least what I think is best for me. What I "should" be doing if I want to accomplish certain things. Or maybe I could plug in the word "need" there. If I want A, I need to do B.
I definitely see your point, and understand how the self talk can help, I just think sometimes being less pressured to do something will make it more likely to happen. I should be studying for a test right now because I want a good grade test. I want to not study right now even more. There is pressure in that situation, I need to study.
Wanting things is one method of improving self-talk and being less pressured, but without a push I just won't do this things.
Get out of the chatbox!!!!
And if it's late don't study, sleep... I want to reprogram myself to go get up quicker in the morning too...
(What happens if you flunk the test? Sometimes this can be a motivation too... I wanted to stay in the dorm and so I studied...)