If I couldn't do something, they would likely just do it for me rather than showing me. I think it was the same with my brother, too. It's set me back a bit. These days they realise I'm in my 20's now, even though my mum does sometimes like to baby me.
My parents were/are the same way! And, I'm 30. It's aggravating, because I learned to not ask for help. They never helped me, they just took over.
My parents did baby me--and spoiled me--and bailed me out whenever I had trouble handling a situation. I think that's stunted my emotional/mental growth considerably. My entire family is very outspoken and independent, except me, which makes me feel like I'm the dumbest of all of us (considering I'm pretty sure a few are geniuses, maybe that's not necessarily such a bad thing.
).
I think they let my brother make his own mistakes and learn from them more than they did with me. I'm not sure if it's because he was the oldest, or a boy, or because I was very small and fragile as a baby (my dad claims they expected me to die as an infant, but my mom denies it--I wonder if they just never told her).
I have spent my entire life being told (first by my parents, then in two abusive relationships) what to do, how to do it, how I feel, what I want. It's very hard for me to really figure out "who" I am at this point. I can hardly make decisions, and usually end up doing nothing when faced with different options.
My parents are also hoarders. We never had company, and we were not allowed to even let anyone see into the house. I think this exacerbated my anxiety greatly, and affected my relationships (both my friends growing up--I could never get very close, and my abusive partners later on--I was used to keeping a secret from everyone else). Honestly, I'm somewhat surprised I don't have physiological problems as a result.
