Losing friends as you get older?

J

jasoncubs88

New member
anyone go through this? i'm 24 and am working full time as a manager. i realize i pretty much have no free time or neevr see or talk to my friends anymore. they are all getting married and starting families while i'm single chillin at home

it pretty much sucks
 
Section_31

Section_31

Well-known member
Yup. I can absolutely relate.

Ive never had alot of friends. Im very particular about whom i call a "friend". But the few i did have, exact same thing. Just how it goes i guess.
 
FeartheGreat

FeartheGreat

Well-known member
Happened to me at the end of my high school days. Only have a hand full of people I still chill with because they refuse to let me be forgotten. They are my buds for life and I feel blessed to be apart of their clique. Hopefully you will meet a group like that as well.
 
mikebird

mikebird

Banned
It is that way.

People desert and go their own ways. There's more to it than getting older. Others I knew get older too, but they all get better luck, with abundance, better cars, being married, with kids and regular holidays, and that's an import factor of losing contact with previous friends because they have their own worlds and make new friends.

My parents gave me a bad start in life. I never knew them or their best friends until they were 50 years old. Just the three of us. My older brothers bred their new families, and still have.

My main friends disappeared when we were 25
 
twiggle

twiggle

Well-known member
I think as you get older, the quality of the friends you have begins to take over the quantity. It's nothing to be concerned about.
 
A

Aron

Well-known member
I think it's natural to lose friends as time passes. Everything changes, nothing lasts forever. That's just life.
 
S

spearhunter

Well-known member
I hope that my close friends since I had since childhood, dont dissapear or move overtime because it is really hard for me to make new friends.
 
Hellhound

Hellhound

Super Moderator
I'll never understand why people has this thing of forgetting about their friends once they start a relationship, get married or whatever. They are your f*cking friends, the ones who have been there for you always. You're going to say you don't have ONE single day to show them that they still exist to you?
 
awkwardamanda

awkwardamanda

Well-known member
All I've got left are distant friends. Around grade 12 I had a good group of friends for awhile. One was my ex-boyfriend. Unfortunately he was needy and smothered me. I barely had time for school, never mind friends. One of those friends moved away and I haven't heard from her lately. Two went to a different school and I grew apart from them. The other two, I'm still kinda friends with. They recently got married. I went to their wedding, but I don't see them much. The only other friend I have went to different high school. She always had other friends and I never got to know any of them all that well. She ended up moving away and now she's engaged. So I don't even have any single friends I can really relate to anymore. I feel very alienated. Even with friends, I always felt like a loner.
 
S

Silatuyok

Well-known member
Yep. I lost my best friend when she had her first baby. I drove two hours to her baby shower and she said, "Oh, I didn't think you were coming." Since then I've tried to keep up the relationship, emailing and sending birthday gifts and whatnot, but she doesn't seem to have time to respond to my messages anymore. Which is strange, because there are an awful lot of pictures of her partying on Facebook. :idontknow:
My sisters don't seem very interested in hanging out much anymore either. I only have one friend left and I'm not letting him get away any time soon.
 
awkwardamanda

awkwardamanda

Well-known member
Absolutely_Sweet_Marie said:
Yep. I lost my best friend when she had her first baby. I drove two hours to her baby shower and she said, "Oh, I didn't think you were coming." Since then I've tried to keep up the relationship, emailing and sending birthday gifts and whatnot, but she doesn't seem to have time to respond to my messages anymore. Which is strange, because there are an awful lot of pictures of her partying on Facebook. :idontknow:
My sisters don't seem very interested in hanging out much anymore either. I only have one friend left and I'm not letting him get away any time soon.
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Ugh, I dread when that happens. Not only does it often lead to growing further apart, but I really don't like kids or babies. I know my friend that just got married always wanted kids. My other friend who is engaged never wanted them all that badly, but she had said that she might. I hate pretending to care. I recently went to a baby shower for one of my cousins and I just stayed silent anytime somebody said it was cute. I was glad no one asked me if I wanted to hold her because I really didn't.
 
S

Silatuyok

Well-known member
awkwardamanda said:
Ugh, I dread when that happens. Not only does it often lead to growing further apart, but I really don't like kids or babies. I know my friend that just got married always wanted kids. My other friend who is engaged never wanted them all that badly, but she had said that she might. I hate pretending to care. I recently went to a baby shower for one of my cousins and I just stayed silent anytime somebody said it was cute. I was glad no one asked me if I wanted to hold her because I really didn't.
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Hahaha! Thank you, I'm glad I'm not the only one. I did make a sincere effort to be interested in my friend's son, but now that she has basically written me off, I just don't care anymore.
Even when she got married we still kept in touch and visited each other, but I don't know why having children made her completely indifferent to me. Haven't seen her in a year, and even then it was only because she wanted to show off her new baby.
:idontknow:
 
awkwardamanda

awkwardamanda

Well-known member
Absolutely_Sweet_Marie said:
Hahaha! Thank you, I'm glad I'm not the only one. I did make a sincere effort to be interested in my friend's son, but now that she has basically written me off, I just don't care anymore.
Even when she got married we still kept in touch and visited each other, but I don't know why having children made her completely indifferent to me. Haven't seen her in a year, and even then it was only because she wanted to show off her new baby.
:idontknow:
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It's common for people to have kids and then grow apart from their friends. Sometimes people can feel like they don't have much in common anymore when one person/couple has kids while the other doesn't. Also, new parents suddenly get very busy and it's hard to make the time for friends. But if you made an effort to stay in touch and she ignored you, that's another story.
 
Flanscho

Flanscho

Well-known member
Hmmm... Can't really say that. I'm in my early thirties, and seeing my friends more often than ever.
 
Saga

Saga

Well-known member
Hellhound said:
I'll never understand why people has this thing of forgetting about their friends once they start a relationship, get married or whatever. They are your f*cking friends, the ones who have been there for you always. You're going to say you don't have ONE single day to show them that they still exist to you?
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I've never understood that either, though I'm probably in no position to be judging their situation. .-. I've never seen why people drift apart from friends just because you have a partner. o.0 Surely you want to spend time around other people, as well. :/
 
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