People that I have phone numbers of? None. I don't talk to or do anything with anyone outside of work. And 99% of the conversations I have at work are work related.
How many real friends do you have?
- Thread starter Etbow23
- Start date
BlueDays
1
In real life, none. It's expected though when you have only gone outside your house for food and necessities for many many years.
If my parents died tomorrow I would have no one in real life to turn to for support/help. That scares the beejeebers out of me.
My SA is too severe to go out and join a club etc to meet new people. I am damned if I do and damned if I don't.
If my parents died tomorrow I would have no one in real life to turn to for support/help. That scares the beejeebers out of me.
My SA is too severe to go out and join a club etc to meet new people. I am damned if I do and damned if I don't.
butterflydreams
Active member
Zero.
Oh, I do have one.
If I can count my dog here.
xP
Oh, I do have one.
If I can count my dog here.
xP
MikeyC
Well-known member
I would love to be your friend if I lived in your part of the country, BlueDays. Hell, I'm your friend right now. Besides, if I lived in your location, I'd be beaching it way more often.
BlueDays
1
Thanks Mickey, I think you would make a brilliant real life friend!
damn shame we live so far away from each other :/lol, if you lived here you'd have one badass suntan.:
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MikeyC
Well-known member
I have the time, but not the money, to visit you, which is a shame. Maybe one day, as I would love to visit North Queensland (Cairns! <3).Thanks Mickey, I think you would make a brilliant real life friend!
lol, if you lived here you'd have one badass suntan.:
If by "suntan" you mean "horrible sunburn," then yeah, I would.
1BlackSheep
Well-known member
Lol! I think my dogs are my best friends too!
I have friends that I see every few months, but no really close friends that I talk to on a daily/semi-daily basis. I had a friend from high school that was close to for a long time, but the friendship started to become toxic and I finally ended it. Another long-time friend (well, not sure if she was truly a friend), constantly lied about stuff and kind of put me at the bottom of her priorities, so I finally called that one quits too. Guess I'm getting much less tolerant of other people's bs in my old age! Sad part is that it's really, really hard to develop those close friendships as you get older because they take a long time to evolve. I do miss the friendship with my high school friend, but I think we've become too different from each other to have what we once did. :
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1BlackSheep
Well-known member
Even though my mother and I argue a lot, she is always there for me. I don't know what I'll do when she eventually passes on either. Scares the beejeebers out of me too!
Hoppy
Well-known member
I have this rather strange definition of friend. It is someone who has been willing to pick up a phone, call me and invite me to do something with him/her. I've now after 20 years of adult life reached the incredible total of 2 people.
One is gay and bi-polar and lives in another town so I see him very seldom. The other one is a woman I once sort of dated who is still living with her mother and has more issues than I am willing to cope with.
Of all the close and extended family I am still waiting for any invitation.
One is gay and bi-polar and lives in another town so I see him very seldom. The other one is a woman I once sort of dated who is still living with her mother and has more issues than I am willing to cope with.
Of all the close and extended family I am still waiting for any invitation.
gustavofring
Well-known member
I have my girlfriend, and I have about 4 people I sometimes hang out with (a group). But because it's really a friend-group, I'm not really close with any of them, just the shallow watching some movies, joking and having fun-routine. It's better then nothing I guess, but it would be cool to have atleast one friend who you can talk to about life.
starimmanuel
Member
Big 0 ::::::
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twiggle
Well-known member
Just a few. I've actually thought about this a lot lately. Until a year or so ago, I used to think quantity was just as important as quality, particularly when I'd be around people who seemed to have a million friends and would go out with loads of different groups of friends. It's easy to feel unpopular sometimes, with technology as it is.
I actually have a lot of 'friends' from different things I've done. But when it comes down to it, there are maybe only about 8 that I can truly consider to be my 'real' friends, who I see and speak to often and who I feel comfortable around. But even with that, I know not to take them for granted. Just because we're close now it doesn't mean we'll always be.
But bearing in mind my anxiety, I've decided to really focus on those few now rather than trying to please everybody like I used to do. I hate being disliked by anybody and I always did what I could to avoid it. I'd worry about what people I don't even care about think. I still do, but less now. I'm much more focused on the few who matter. I'm not bothered about quantity anymore.
It's like that famous saying, I'm not sure who said it...
"As we grow older we don't lose friends, we just find out who our real ones are".
I actually have a lot of 'friends' from different things I've done. But when it comes down to it, there are maybe only about 8 that I can truly consider to be my 'real' friends, who I see and speak to often and who I feel comfortable around. But even with that, I know not to take them for granted. Just because we're close now it doesn't mean we'll always be.
But bearing in mind my anxiety, I've decided to really focus on those few now rather than trying to please everybody like I used to do. I hate being disliked by anybody and I always did what I could to avoid it. I'd worry about what people I don't even care about think. I still do, but less now. I'm much more focused on the few who matter. I'm not bothered about quantity anymore.
It's like that famous saying, I'm not sure who said it...
"As we grow older we don't lose friends, we just find out who our real ones are".
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Shant
Well-known member
Very few. One is wasting his life away and I haven't seen in person for a few years. So... he's out of the picture.
The other one lives two hours away, due to university, and I see occasionally throughout the year. For the most part, don't see often.
I eventually stopped trying to make friends, figuring that subconsciously, I just really didn't want friends; I have too much of a push-pull going on with that. What's ironic, is that after making said vow, all of a sudden I come across some that actually want to befriend me. Now I'm more confused than ever before. Thanks, life.
The other one lives two hours away, due to university, and I see occasionally throughout the year. For the most part, don't see often.
I eventually stopped trying to make friends, figuring that subconsciously, I just really didn't want friends; I have too much of a push-pull going on with that. What's ironic, is that after making said vow, all of a sudden I come across some that actually want to befriend me. Now I'm more confused than ever before. Thanks, life.
nosferatu
Well-known member
1? I've known him for over 10 years, but I've come to hate him these past 2 years. He comes over once a month, and when he's over he makes me feel upset, anxious, angry, etc. If I were female, I guess he would be my period.
I have no other friends, so I put up with him. Beggars can't be choosers.
I have no other friends, so I put up with him. Beggars can't be choosers.
MikeyC
Well-known member
Why does he make you feel like this?
nosferatu
Well-known member
He exploits my weaknesses for his own amusement.
He is my only source for socializing, so I put up with it. As bad as my anxiety is, it's impossible to make new friends.
Edit: He is not always an *******. Sometimes he is nice.
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MikeyC
Well-known member
As tough as it might be, that should be something you should discuss with him, as it's not really fair on you for him to be exploiting you that way. Even though you have anxiety, you shouldn't have to put up with it.
Sure, sometimes he is nice - you wouldn't be friends with him if he wasn't - but it still makes you upset, judging from your last post, and there's no reason for you to continue dealing with that. If you're confident enough and he's approachable, talk to him about it and, if he is truly your friend, he will respect your wishes and he'll try to change his attitude.
How_slow_the_Wind
Well-known member
I was actually in a situation similar to that. I was friends with this dude who was otherwise known as a "nice guy". The thing was as he become more popular he also became more self-conscious about socialising with me. Eventually he just became mean and started saying things like "you have no friends" or gay slurs that were excused under the guise of joking, but you could tell he was just being cruel because he could get away with it.
It's difficult to judge your own situation, but in my experience it was much better to get rid of a negative social realtionship, even if it meant being more of a loner.
Ironically, through social networking, the dude makes status updates about being "lonliness" and how people don't appreciate him enough(despite having his own social circle). Go figure.