Do you love to be loved?

[DeadmanWalking]

Yeah, I love to be loved. It's a real esteem booster. However, I think I'm all out of love at the moment. I feel hated by my family, I barely have any friends, and I believe I have a better chance at winning the lottery than finding someone who will see me in a romantic light. It seems platonic and familial love is all I can get and I don't even get enough of that considering I have little to no friends and my family is nitpicking at me and my hobbies and fashion taste.

 

[lonely_drummer]

I love showing love, but when someone returns the favor I feel like running away. I get so scared and intimidated by strong emotions from other people. I feel like when they show love or something like that they're expecting too much from me. That they think too much of me. I see myself as a useless failure, so when someone likes me, I feel like I'm using and tricking them, which, makes me afraid it's a matter of time until they find out the truth and don't like me any more. Hence my avoidance.

Wow, I feel the same way. Im so scared of someone else figuring out the true me and then falling out of love with me. Plus I don't love myself so how could anyone else?

 

[doubtmyself]

Has little to do with 'getting hopes too high' as I've only experienced love with one man- was fortunate enough to have him reciprocate and apart from him, I don't want to accept anyone's feelings; as I have little trust for humanity due to my past experiences and it only seems troublesome.

I'm glad to hear you have at least had that.

I would like people to feel neutral about me. Maybe to not even notice.
To be disliked destroys.
QUOTE]

I sometimes feel "neutral" is best at work. At least then you don't get harassed.
I'm concerned that you think you will be detroyed if someone dislikes you. We all have to put up with that don't we?

there's this specific person that I know if I manage to attract their complete love, my life would completely change in a very positive way and I could more easily attract the poeple that I wanted to....that person is myself!

Self-love? An alien concept for most of us!

when someone likes me, I feel like I'm using and tricking them, which, makes me afraid it's a matter of time until they find out the truth and don't like me any more. Hence my avoidance.

You seem to have made a few friends here. It would be interesting to ask them whether they feel tricked!
The truth may not be bad news after all!::

 

[MikeyC]

Apart from being attracted to one person, once- I think I'm asexual and the thought of love/attraction/sex tends to disgust me.
I've been sexually and physically abused, so I guess I tend to associate 'love' and the strong feelings/passion- with sex, with abuse; though I know love isn't just that at all. I have experienced both, but it's much more often one way; and not in their favor.
There is unconditional love as well. I've had that. That doesn't scare me as much.
I've just got it twisted in my head and I really don't want it.

Has little to do with 'getting hopes too high' as I've only experienced love with one man- was fortunate enough to have him reciprocate and apart from him, I don't want to accept anyone's feelings; as I have little trust for humanity due to my past experiences and it only seems troublesome.

Maybe harsh... but that's how I've got things in my head.

I think it's harsh, but you have reason for that. I'm very sorry that's how you feel. ::

 

[doubtmyself]

Wow, I feel the same way. Im so scared of someone else figuring out the true me and then falling out of love with me. Plus I don't love myself so how could anyone else?

Maybe we all make that mistake to a lesser or greater extent.
So our first few intimate relationships are full of high ideals and expectations. But gradually as we grow up we realise.."Oh I'm not as bad as I thought" and the more tolerant you are of your partner's foibles, (in the right relationship), the more tolerant she is likely to be of yours. But you both need to grow though a learning curve..
Starting to sound like an expert...which I'm not..

 

[Shyangel]

@ Drummer

Yeah, loving yourself, I would certainly think, is key. I don't like/love myself either. That's another reason why I'll avoid relationships for a long time. Because it's going to take a while for me to fix that. If I ever do. You are a amazing guy, Drummer. It shocks me that your not arrogant with your level of talent. You also have a very fun easy going personality that I think would draw people to you. You have so many great things going for ya, Drummer.

@Doubtmyself

I've met some cool people on here that I would like to consider friends.
It might not be, but it wont change the fact that I believe they should.

Thanks for the kind words, Doubtmyself.

 

[MikeyC]

I don't like/love myself either.

You should! You're great.

 

[Shyangel]

You should! You're great.

Your sweet, Mikey. ^.^
I wish that were true.

 

[MikeyC]

Your sweet, Mikey. ^.^
I wish that were true.

I hope you one day see that it is true.

 

[Shyangel]

I hope you one day see that it is true.

I hope you can do the same, Mikey.

Because your just to sweet and handsome a guy not to.

 

[MrJones]

I love to love. People don't love me back, but at least I'd like if they loked me back. I usually don't even get that, only rejection.

I don't have much energy so I only focus on those people who I think are "good" people, people I like. When those people reject me, it kills me. I want to love people but some make it very hard and it's frustrating how I spend all my energy for people who don't want anything from me.

 

[coyote]

feeling loved is one of the best feelings in the world

 

[Aletheia]

If somebody loves me when I feel like I'm not excelling at life/self, then I feel resentment and become self destructive.

If somebody loves me when I feel like I'm not worthy of it, I think of them, "What the hell is wrong with you?"

And become self destructive.

 

[Feathers]

I think I may have an ambiguous feeling about love and being 'loved' too..

Like, partly it can be exciting, and partly scary - it depends.. (maybe it's supposed to be that way??)

 

[Lexington]

I just wanna be loved for who I am warts 'n all!
Hang on I don't have any warts.

 

[SAM2011]

"Love is for the lucky and the strong"

 

[kilojoule]

Well I heart you all

 

[MikeyC]

feeling loved is one of the best feelings in the world

I agree but when it doesn't come from the person you want it can be one of the worst feelings in the world.

An emotions of extremes.

Well I heart you all

I heart you too! <3

 

[OceanMist]

This is another human nature thing. It's human nature to desire love and acceptance.

 

[coyote]

if you can't be with the one you love - love the one you're with