"Why you truly never leave high school"

[lurknomore]

Why You Never Truly Leave High School -- New York Magazine

Interesting article, but it's kind of long. Basically what it's saying is that what happens to us as adolescents sticks with us more/longer than any other time in our lives, and American high schools are pretty much the worst environment to be stuck in for this period of development. One quote from it, "But if humans really do feel things most intensely during adolescence, and if, at this same developmental moment, they also happen to be working out an identity for the first time- "sometimes morbidly, often curiously, preoccupied with what they appear to be in the eyes of others as compared with what they feel they are," as the psychoanalyst Erik Erikson wrote- then it seems safe to say this: Most American high schools are almost sadistically unhealthy places to send adolescents."

I'm not sure how schools and experiences for teenagers in other countries compare, but when I read this, it was like an "aha" moment, and makes sense to me. What do you guys think?

Also, it made me think of this clip from a Family Guy episode- like maybe we shouldn't be laughing...

YouTube

 

[Opaline]

Absolutely. After reading a bit about the current American school system, I've come to the conclusion that it is a profoundly unhealthy place to spend your childhood and adolescence. It encourages a pack mentality, it encourages bullying. As a blogger once pointed out, few other times in life is one forced to interact only with those of the same age group. After high school you are exposed to people of all different ages in different settings you are in, but in primary school the people you're around are all the same age and so it encourages immaturity, increased competition, and other things.

I believe the current system we have is called Prussian style because it is modeled after the Prussian school system that came about in the 19th century.

We really need to find another way to educate people without doing so much damage during their formative years.

 

[ImNotMyIllness]

I think parents and home life constitute a large part of the problem too.......maybe not for everyone, but for a lot.

 

[jaim38]

I've only had about 2 friends from high school. So guess what, I'm not going to any high school reunion. I have less than 15 friends on FB, so there's really no pressure for me to show up. No one is going to ask, "Where did _______ go? Why didn't she come?" I was pretty much invisible during high school, no one (except my friends) will care. Even if I become successful, I will not go back. High school is over, for me.

 

[MikeyC]

YouTube

I did have a lot of issues in high school, but this was still funny.

We really need to find another way to educate people without doing so much damage during their formative years.

What's the alternative, though? Everything costs money and nobody has enough of it.

I agree about the pack mentality and all that - that's how I felt when I was in school. I couldn't do anything about it, and I'm glad I'm out of there now.

I have a 10 year reunion thing in a week's time. Guess who's not going? This guy.

 

[Kiwong]

This is true, high school has an impact that isn't obvious at the time, but manifests itself in different ways later in life.

And I find that many adults really haven't grown up since high school.

 

[Klonoa]

It encourages a pack mentality, it encourages bullying. [...] After high school you are exposed to people of all different ages in different settings you are in, but in primary school the people you're around are all the same age and so it encourages immaturity, increased competition, and other things.

^THIS. A MILLION TIMES THIS.

In Mexico it mostly happens in religious schools. And boy, by personal experience, that pack mentality... If yer "different", no matter how small of a difference, they will all hunt you down and bully you...

And worst, if you defend, the school heads goes against you for defending yourself with petty double standards about "you shouldn't have stood to their level" or to just deal with it...

 

[skins]

i do blame highschool as major contributing factor to my SA problems... if i ever had kids and thought they were having similar troubles in highschool, i would not hesitate to pull them out and home school.

i believe it is a mentally destructive education system. The bullies thrive in this environment and go on to utilise this behaviour later on in life while the rest are relatively lesser off from the whole experiance.

 

[hidwell]

For sensitive children school in general is quite a toxic environment. The life skills you may pick up are not going to help you if you are bullied to the point of taking your own life. With bullying rates increasing this problem is only going to get worse.

 

[kilojoule]

Also, it made me think of this clip from a Family Guy episode- like maybe we shouldn't be laughing...

YouTube

:lol:

Ha gotta love Dawson's creek, lets face it we all learned something from it...every second word had to be looked up in the dictionary ...all so very serious and intense!!!

 

[ImNotMyIllness]

:lol:

Ha gotta love Dawson's creek, lets face it we all learned something from it...every second word had to be looked up in the dictionary ...all so very serious and intense!!!

I use to love that show. LOL! (ahem ahem) I guess Tom Cruise also loved that show.

 

[squidgee]

i do blame highschool as major contributing factor to my SA problems... if i ever had kids and thought they were having similar troubles in highschool, i would not hesitate to pull them out and home school.

While I agree that high school is probably for many a significant factor for people's SA, I'm not sure if home schooling would do much good. Wouldn't home schooling seclude the student from the outside world?

 

[Opaline]

Wouldn't home schooling seclude the student from the outside world?

Everyone says this and I don't understand why. It seems to be the biggest argument against homeschooling. Don't people realize that there was once a time when people didn't sit in a classroom filled with 25 other people to be taught? People used to be homeschooled and they seemed to have turned out okay, considering they are our ancestors. There are other ways to make friends, meet people, gain life experience.

I'm not an expert though, so no I do not have a good solution. Only some ideas.

 

[jaim38]

^Another solution is online classes. Instead of forcing people into a classroom, online classes allow people to study, do homework, and take tests whenever wherever.

 

[skins]

While I agree that high school is probably for many a significant factor for people's SA, I'm not sure if home schooling would do much good. Wouldn't home schooling seclude the student from the outside world?

yes and no, they might miss out on going to the odd social activity but there would still be plenty of opportunities to partake in social events, encouraging them to join a sporting club would help etc. But protecting their self confidence would more then make up for any negatives, as you think about it, what's the critical ingredient to a successful life? self confidence and a good self esteem, mine was shattered by high school...if you think about it, many remote country kids grow up with either distance education or home schooling and do just fine.

 

[squidgee]

Everyone says this and I don't understand why. It seems to be the biggest argument against homeschooling. Don't people realize that there was once a time when people didn't sit in a classroom filled with 25 other people to be taught? People used to be homeschooled and they seemed to have turned out okay, considering they are our ancestors. There are other ways to make friends, meet people, gain life experience.

Sorry I think I should've made it more clear in my previous post that I was talking about someone with SA.

I know home schooling is an alternative worth consideration, but what about someone with SA? Someone who has a more severe case probably wouldn't grasp these opportunities to socialise unless forced to. I mean drawing someone with SA out of high school would provide them with more immediate and short term comfort but without that exposure, over a period of time, they might find it harder to function outside of home.

I'm no expert either on the topic, just giving my opinion.

 

[skins]

.. But protecting their self confidence would more then make up for any negatives, as you think about it, what's the critical ingredient to a successful life? self confidence and a good self esteem, mine was shattered by high school...if you think about it, many remote country kids grow up with either distance education or home schooling and do just fine.

i maintain benefits would still outweigh any negatives by atleast 2:1. ...i would rather have entered my adault life with maybefewer friends but greater confidence. there is always chances to practice your social skills and gain friendships later on in your working life then teenage years anyway.