Sacrament
Well-known member
Way to make a generalized assumption about an entire gender.
"Why haven't you got a girl/boyfriend?" - your response
- Thread starter nightcrawler
- Start date
Way to make a generalized assumption about an entire gender.
Graeme1988
Hie yer hence from me heath!
"Why don't I have a girlfriend?"
Well, deeply ingrained trust and self-esteem issues. Plus, to be honest, ah don't really have much to offer, aside from looks, really. See?! Telt ye ah've got self-esteem issues.
Well, deeply ingrained trust and self-esteem issues. Plus, to be honest, ah don't really have much to offer, aside from looks, really. See?! Telt ye ah've got self-esteem issues.
THeCARS1979
Well-known member
I would start making excuses if i dont know them. I dont know if they believe me or not. If they do know me well, they understand my situation and traumatic trouble
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theoutsider
Well-known member
planemo
Well-known member
I don't think anyone is gonna ask me that question, but if they do...
It's because I'm short on looks, cash and mental fortitude.
I could offer a woman loyalty, friendship, supportive words and a quirky sense of humour, but I don't think anyone would be interested in that.
h:
(oh and I'm not having a go at all women for being vain/fickle. most people seem to think this way, including men. it's just a product of society)
It's because I'm short on looks, cash and mental fortitude.
I could offer a woman loyalty, friendship, supportive words and a quirky sense of humour, but I don't think anyone would be interested in that.
h:(oh and I'm not having a go at all women for being vain/fickle. most people seem to think this way, including men. it's just a product of society)
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I had zero passion for most of my life. I wanted emotional ties but I guess it alone was not enough for me to take initiative. I also had very little confidence, if any, and my thoughts and expectations about women were never consistent with reality.
Now I started to have passion but dating seems weird to me. It comes to me as too stressful, too judgmental, and I feel like both sides are making advertisements of themselves. I think it is natural for it to be like this, but still it turns me off.
Now I started to have passion but dating seems weird to me. It comes to me as too stressful, too judgmental, and I feel like both sides are making advertisements of themselves. I think it is natural for it to be like this, but still it turns me off.
DanielLewis
Well-known member
I want a girlfriend, but I've never had one and I'm 23-years-old. It's because I didn't try to get one or show interest in women practically my whole life. I was the guy who didn't go to any of the dances or prom in school. I didn't take risks, and I regret it. Yeah, every once in a while throughout school, a girl would show interest in me and pursue a relationship, but somehow I managed to never make it happen. Once was in 6th grade, and that lasted for like a week. We just held hands and whatever, it was 6th grade. Another two girls in middle school wanted to go out with me, but nothing happened there either. One of my friends back then, who wasn't a very good friend, convinced me to not go out with a girl who asked me to because he said she was a ****. Now I just realize he was a bad friend holding me back from bettering myself and succeeding; he was probably jealous.
I regret not pursuing these opportunities and women more earlier in my life because I would've had a lot more experience by now and it wouldn't be as hard to get a girlfriend. Since I lack experience, I just recently messed up another opportunity with the most beautiful women I've ever met. It sucks, but at least I've decided now enough is enough. I'm on a journey of self-improvement and self-discovery that, inevitably, will lead me to the life I've always wanted. It's only a matter of time as long as I take action consistently. It's not about getting a girlfriend right now. That would be nice, but right now I just need to focus on overcoming shyness, a lack of self-esteem and confidence, and improving my social skills. If I do this, I will attract people into my life and getting a girlfriend will just be a natural by-product of that. If you embody the qualities that women are attracted to - confidence, humor, indifference, mysteriousness, etc. - then getting a girlfriend becomes easy.
I have come to the realization, though, that I don't need a girlfriend. There's a difference between needing and wanting. Women aren't attracted to neediness. I just need to have a good time and be the man I'm destined to be around them and they'll flock to me. Not having options can put you in the neediness mindset. This is part of why I screwed up with this gorgeous blonde recently. She was the only women in my life so I was needy and felt I needed to get her to like me. Other than being shy and unconfident, I also tried to force things, which drove her away out of my life. I learned a valuable lesson: never try to force a relationship with anyone. You MUST let it develop naturally. With women, there is a natural courtship process, beginning with eye-contact. You can't skip ahead and skip parts of the process. It doesn't work. I foolishly skipped ahead to going for the kiss when I hadn't yet built enough comfort and enough of an emotional connection first. I didn't physically build up to it either.
I regret not pursuing these opportunities and women more earlier in my life because I would've had a lot more experience by now and it wouldn't be as hard to get a girlfriend. Since I lack experience, I just recently messed up another opportunity with the most beautiful women I've ever met. It sucks, but at least I've decided now enough is enough. I'm on a journey of self-improvement and self-discovery that, inevitably, will lead me to the life I've always wanted. It's only a matter of time as long as I take action consistently. It's not about getting a girlfriend right now. That would be nice, but right now I just need to focus on overcoming shyness, a lack of self-esteem and confidence, and improving my social skills. If I do this, I will attract people into my life and getting a girlfriend will just be a natural by-product of that. If you embody the qualities that women are attracted to - confidence, humor, indifference, mysteriousness, etc. - then getting a girlfriend becomes easy.
I have come to the realization, though, that I don't need a girlfriend. There's a difference between needing and wanting. Women aren't attracted to neediness. I just need to have a good time and be the man I'm destined to be around them and they'll flock to me. Not having options can put you in the neediness mindset. This is part of why I screwed up with this gorgeous blonde recently. She was the only women in my life so I was needy and felt I needed to get her to like me. Other than being shy and unconfident, I also tried to force things, which drove her away out of my life. I learned a valuable lesson: never try to force a relationship with anyone. You MUST let it develop naturally. With women, there is a natural courtship process, beginning with eye-contact. You can't skip ahead and skip parts of the process. It doesn't work. I foolishly skipped ahead to going for the kiss when I hadn't yet built enough comfort and enough of an emotional connection first. I didn't physically build up to it either.
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Metal_isthe_Answer
Well-known member
Been asked that by my dad actually
Bronson99
Well-known member
Why not? Because it hasn't fallen into my lap.
As in: I don't see any extroverted "normal" people doing any work to achieve either a romantic and/or carnal relationship. They are being themselves and doing nothing besides that.
Am I not allowed to be myself? So what if I don't have social status, don't have empathy, and generally cannot relate to people, do not want to cater to some sort of "cookie-cutter" expectations about social functioning? That IS myself. I can't be anything besides that; see above paragraph, if it works for them, it should work for me; and if it doesn't, that's how it's going to be, unless it does.
In general, you cannot "work" your way or "self-improve" your way into a relationship.
As in: I don't see any extroverted "normal" people doing any work to achieve either a romantic and/or carnal relationship. They are being themselves and doing nothing besides that.
Am I not allowed to be myself? So what if I don't have social status, don't have empathy, and generally cannot relate to people, do not want to cater to some sort of "cookie-cutter" expectations about social functioning? That IS myself. I can't be anything besides that; see above paragraph, if it works for them, it should work for me; and if it doesn't, that's how it's going to be, unless it does.
In general, you cannot "work" your way or "self-improve" your way into a relationship.