Why did you get SA

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mads

Well-known member
I think it could be interesting to know why you think you got SA/SP.

For me it was a combination of my parrents divorcing when I was 5, a weak father, I got epilepsy at about 6, weight problems due to my medication, a grand mother who was quite hard on me and and some other things.

Luckily I dont have SA anymore.
 
philly2bits

philly2bits

Well-known member
In my case I don't think it's possible to come up with a single reason or even a few reasons. I could come up a few experiences that I think would have caused it, but they would only be guesses. I'm more inclined to that my SA is the culmination of factors like genetics and many small events in my life that on there own would not cause any problems, maybe even such small events I don't remember them as at the time they had no effect on me. Over time though these events along with others had lead to SA.
 
M

mads

Well-known member
Thank you so much for your answers so far.

@AimeeSP, I am really sorry to hear about the horrible things you have experienced.
 
combat

combat

Well-known member
I was constantly made fun of in school. Other kids hated me for reasons I still haven't figured out, it's not like I was ever mean to anyone or did anything to deserve that. So that just made me shut down, talk to people even less, and really increased my shyness.

One year this girl found out I had a major crush on her, so she wrote a "love letter" to me saying how much she likes me and that we should go out. I was really happy and wrote a note back, only to have her laugh at me with her friends, rip it up, and tell me that she would never like a guy like me. Everyone in the classroom knew about it. I think that seriously fucked me up. I've conquered a lot of my shyness issues, but as far as the opposite sex is concerned, even now at age 25 I still have a tremendous fear of rejection and am extremely insecure (and girls can sense that, which doesn't exactly help either).
 
M

mads

Well-known member
combat said:
I was constantly made fun of in school. Other kids hated me for reasons I still haven't figured out, it's not like I was ever mean to anyone or did anything to deserve that. So that just made me shut down, talk to people even less, and really increased my shyness.

One year this girl found out I had a major crush on her, so she wrote a "love letter" to me saying how much she likes me and that we should go out. I was really happy and wrote a note back, only to have her laugh at me with her friends, rip it up, and tell me that she would never like a guy like me. Everyone in the classroom knew about it. I think that seriously fucked me up. I've conquered a lot of my shyness issues, but as far as the opposite sex is concerned, even now at age 25 I still have a tremendous fear of rejection and am extremely insecure (and girls can sense that, which doesn't exactly help either).
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I was bullied a lot too also by my teachers. But that was other ways they did it, like class "mates" telling me they would kill me when I got back in school, so often I did not went to school for like a month or two.

Kids in school will always find one to bully. I dont think there is much to do about it. The important is, that the teacher open their eyes and see which kids who are not feeling well in the class.

The thing she did is just plain evil, no doubt about that. I am really sorry to hear that. Have you tried to go into therapy to start feeling better about yourself and women?
 
mrb

mrb

Well-known member
mads said:
You were living alone with your mother?
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nope i was 1 of 6 kids .. my old man was um lets just say he didnt have much time for us kids .. and my mother wouldnt even go in a shop cos of her sa ... funny thing is im the only one in my family with sa .. well my brother jamies a bit shy but im the worst ...
 
M

mads

Well-known member
mrb said:
nope i was 1 of 6 kids .. my old man was um lets just say he didnt have much time for us kids .. and my mother wouldnt even go in a shop cos of her sa ... funny thing is im the only one in my family with sa .. well my brother jamies a bit shy but im the worst ...
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So maybe one of the reasons for your SA could be the lack of a father figure?
 
M

mads

Well-known member
mrb said:
what are you a shrink :eek: lol only messing yea maybe who knows mads , i dont ;)
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I aint, I am just trying to think logical, which is often not going very well. I sucked at the logical part of math in school;)
 
mrb

mrb

Well-known member
mads said:
I aint, I am just trying to think logical, which is often not going very well. I sucked at the logical part of math in school;)
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school ? oh school didnt go to school that much , but i do remember getting the cane for not going to school many times , dunno why , maybe i secretly enjoyed being caned mate ..:D
 
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userremoved

Guest
I think for me it was a combination of genetics, being bullied and life being incredibly unfair that gave me SA.
 
lyricalliaisons

lyricalliaisons

Well-known member
There are only one of two choices in my case & it might have been a combination of the two. Either I was born with it, or a seizure I had when I was three due to an adverse reaction to penicillin could have inadvertently caused it.
 
Josh5339

Josh5339

Well-known member
My absent father who's a criminal and due to that being sent away by my mother a couple months after I was born - it has a way of seriously messing with your head. Sure I was lucky enough to get adopted, still doesn't clear the past - I'm still one of the "bastard sons" of America. In fighting him, or his presence, in my mind my SA is actually getting better somehow. Thus, they're definitely inter-connected.
 
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