What you see in the mirror...is it what other's see?

Pookah

Pookah

Well-known member
I was messing with my webcam, it defaults to a non-mirror image. Meaning if you hold up a message you can read it and you appear as you would to someone looking at you. I'm not used to seeing myself that way (because I only see myself in mirrors or pictures) and it triggered a wave of anxiety. I felt like I looked more uneven/unattractive that way. Now I am forced to think when people look at me it is even worse that what I thought.

Yes stupid things like this do occasionally bother me. :p I'll try to make up for the mundanity of this post with my next one.
 
sullyS1985

sullyS1985

Well-known member
I am guilty of this as well due to my SA but u r too worried! I like your picture and especially the glasses so chill out!
 
K

Krista

Well-known member
Oh don't feel that way. I have this horrible image of myself in my head of how I assume everyone else sees me too but I have to remind myself that it's not what they think and I'm pretty...even though I never feel like it lol. You're beautiful anyways!
 
Flowers-Of-Bloom

Flowers-Of-Bloom

Well-known member
Oh this happened to me... I saw myself on a recorded video and then broke down in tears... And suffered a(nother) major hit my self-esteem/image. I mean, I already I had a pretty good idea of what I looked like, but seeing my self on video from every angle, how others see me... I couldn't believe it was me. Even if I'm not the ugliest person in the world, it worries me. Maybe it's BDD, or maybe I'm just realistic. People say "Oh but you're cute/pretty/whatever!" and it's so damn confusing. I can't tell if they're just being nice or honest.

I hate superfical beauty. I hate how everything revolves around it. I hate my face, and pretty much everything else there is to me.

-___-
Sorry, needed to vent.

Krista said:
I have this horrible image of myself in my head of how I assume everyone else sees me too but I have to remind myself that it's not what they think and I'm pretty...even though I never feel like it lol.
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At least it's all in your head. ::p:
 
Pookah

Pookah

Well-known member
Flowers-Of-Bloom said:
Oh this happened to me... I saw myself on a recorded video and then broke down in tears... And suffered a(nother) major hit my self-esteem/image. I mean, I already I had a pretty good idea of what I looked like, but seeing my self on video from every angle, how others see me... I couldn't believe it was me. Even if I'm not the ugliest person in the world, it worries me. Maybe it's BDD, or maybe I'm just realistic. People say "Oh but you're cute/pretty/whatever!" and it's so damn confusing. I can't tell if they're just being nice or honest.

I hate superfical beauty. I hate how everything revolves around it. I hate my face, and pretty much everything else there is to me.

-___-
Sorry, needed to vent.



At least it's all in your head. ::p:
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Its ok to vent.

The problem is still that what you see if from your perspective, even if you are seeing the correct angle, you still aren't the other people looking at you. There is always the possibility that your perspective is skewed.
 
hippiechild

hippiechild

Well-known member
I haven't looked at a mirror in months for this exact reason. I'm relatively certain that I'm hideously horrible and I don't feel the need to look in the mirror to confirm it.

Going on webcam! You're a brave, brave woman, Pookah! You look just fine in your avatar and everywhere else that I've seen you. Go out there and allow everyone a chance to see that pretty, smiling face of yours :)
 
K

Krista

Well-known member
Flowers-Of-Bloom said:
Oh this happened to me... I saw myself on a recorded video and then broke down in tears... And suffered a(nother) major hit my self-esteem/image. I mean, I already I had a pretty good idea of what I looked like, but seeing my self on video from every angle, how others see me... I couldn't believe it was me. Even if I'm not the ugliest person in the world, it worries me. Maybe it's BDD, or maybe I'm just realistic. People say "Oh but you're cute/pretty/whatever!" and it's so damn confusing. I can't tell if they're just being nice or honest.

I hate superfical beauty. I hate how everything revolves around it. I hate my face, and pretty much everything else there is to me.

-___-
Sorry, needed to vent.



At least it's all in your head. ::p:
Click to expand...


Um I think you're very pretty. I hate people telling me that because it seems fake. Like they're telling me this to be nice, not to hurt my feelings. Or " but you have such a pretty face"...thanks. That's what you tell girls when they're really not pretty so I must be right about myself.
 
Pookah

Pookah

Well-known member
hippiechild said:
I haven't looked at a mirror in months for this exact reason. I'm relatively certain that I'm hideously horrible and I don't feel the need to look in the mirror to confirm it.

Going on webcam! You're a brave, brave woman, Pookah! You look just fine in your avatar and everywhere else that I've seen you. Go out there and allow everyone a chance to see that pretty, smiling face of yours :)
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I was thinking about posting something on youtube. When I realized you have to flip the screen back from mirror to read text I kind of lost the nerve.
 
K

Krista

Well-known member
Hellhound said:
I don't see any mirrors because my own image disgusts me. No matter how hard i've tried, i always look like a fatass disgusting pig -.- Most people over here tell me how bad i look, so it must be true.
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People who say things like that are never speaking the truth, they're saying just to hurt someone else so don't listen to them even though it's hard. They're just being assholes not telling you the real truth.
 
evil feline space cadet

evil feline space cadet

Banned
Pookah said:
Live in a city? That's just crazy. You are cute, wtf?!
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Nahhh just scarily talented with a camera. Im a lot heavier and tired looking than youd imagine! On two occasions ive met up with guys for semi-blind dates (they saw photos but not the real me) n they left straight away- one slagging me off to his friends, and the other making vomiting noises! and yehh i live in the city.
 
BlackKids

BlackKids

Well-known member
x_No_Oil_Painting_x said:
Nahhh just scarily talented with a camera. Im a lot heavier and tired looking than youd imagine! On two occasions ive met up with guys for semi-blind dates (they saw photos but not the real me) n they left straight away- one slagging me off to his friends, and the other making vomiting noises! and yehh i live in the city.
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Christ! Whats wrong with certain people?

Takes courage to go on a bind date though so fair play for that :)
 
evil feline space cadet

evil feline space cadet

Banned
Blackkids- the last one was in

2006. That was guy number two- the vomiting one! havent done it since and won't unless the person just wants to be friends. Longest bus-journey home ever! Actually wanted to die. Afraid to meet up with people i talk to online cos of that incase they insult me. Though i did meet up with a guy from Cavan- as friends only like- we're still in contact just not as often as before.
 
elek2ronik

elek2ronik

1
I have this problem too, its so frustrating. I can take semi-decent pictures of myself of which I am happy with. In all other pictures however that other people take, or videos of me appear almost a totally different person to me! It does affect my self-esteem but the thoughts of me working out and working towards certain goals allows me to brush it off.

Over the years I have been able to gain confidence through dating and actually maintaining a relationship. But even after having relationships and reassurance of my appearance, i still suffer this problem. From my experiences, its a confidence and self worth issue. As i have gained confidence and cared more for myself as a person...the problem seems to be getting better as time goes on.
 
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