What are you talking with your friends?

[paye]

I can not talk.

Nothing to say for me.

What are you telling those people?


i m trying to ask "topics"

what topics are you genarally talk with other people?

 

[Roman Legion]

It took me over 1.5 years to be able to speak to my only friend gained in high school and we never really said that much.. We very seldom see eachother anymore, but every so often he drops by and we go out to a Chinese buffet and have a small conversation as the place never really has anyone dining in, just take out and we sit way out of the way. We basically are both people with severe social issues, but he has been semi-successful with working on his. We have one major thing in common, we both overly think and we just discuss some of the things that go through our minds.. Mostly observations, a few science/ math based jokes and philosophy.. But again, I don't see him on a daily basis or even monthly.. Every 6 or so months he comes by. When we were still in high school we seldom ever had a need to talk much to eachother and never in an area with people, so we went outside at lunchtime to speak.

 

[Boby]

Well first of all you need to understand what is a friend.
Friend is a person that have a lot in common with you.So there is no guide "How to talk with your friends?" because you have things in common with that person and you have plenty of things to talk about...if you don't have things to talk about with your so called friend than I'm sorry for you but that's not a friend.
For example I have only 2 friends ,both of them are university colleagues so one of the most talked subject is school or one of them is a gamer and I'm also a gamer( or at least was,I'm trying to quit) so another subject to talk about is video games and so on...

 

[recluse]

This is a huge problem for me. I avoid people because i want to avoid the burden of having to make and keep conversation. It hurts because my heart aches to have a friend and more so a girlfriend but having no ability to converse is no good.

I envy those people who can talk about anything and make simple topics into conversation. I find i am a conversation killer, like i will answer ''Yes'' ''no'' ''fine thankyou'' etc.

I think i make people uncomfortable, like in my karate class a lady asked me how i was and i just said ''i'm ok thanks'' when i know damn well she was hoping for a longer convo.

 

[dyingtolive]

Its usually easier when in a group of 3, like in lunchbreaks etc, then you can just watch quietly in the background and just join in when the conversation is already rolling. If I can avoid awkward situations where im alone with someone else, i do. Those are difficult for me because there's no 'buffer'.

When i have nothing to say, like Recluse' Ok Thanks, if im in an ok mood, i usually raise my eyebrows and make my eyes / mouth smile even if im saying absolutely nothing of value, to signify that im open and approachable.

If i am not disturbed by something or don't dislike a person, i am very friendly in public and approachable. i think i developed this habit to contrast against a couple of family members of mine who were mean in public and it bothered me.

 

[Invisibleman]

Yeah I know what you mean. I mean its not like I can talk anyway because of my anxiety obviously but sometimes I think even without SA I would still have nothing to talk about. Its not too bad when im with somebody thats really chatty then I can kinda let them steer the conversation.,but when they are quiet like me im screwed. I have this friend that I work out with at the school gym everyday and we're always in complete silence,none of us have anything to say.

 

[montejocarlo]

everything about them and a few things about me. not that i don't want to talk about myself more but because i cringe at the spotlight, especially when we're in groups. we talk about trivial things- often those that we all have interest in like movies, tv shows, games. we talk about our recent experiences as well as their problems. whenever the topic goes dangerously close to me and my troubles, i immediately change it. if it's inevitable, i make sure to keep a poker face and try to be nonchalant while narrating.

 

[jonas89]

with closest friends it's everything from poop to meaning of life.
But with people that I don't know that great, it's often about stuff we have in common like:
sports
school
what is happening in society
music

 

[Boby]

i was trying to ask "topics"

what topics are you genarally talk with other people?

Look mate,I already told you there is no such thing as "canned" topics.
Only you know what to talk with your friends.
But I assume you where asking what to talk to people in general not only friends,in that case you can talk about more general topics like music,movies,internet,TV shows,sport,weather,news etc.

 

[EscapeArtist]

This is a huge problem for me. I avoid people because i want to avoid the burden of having to make and keep conversation. It hurts because my heart aches to have a friend and more so a girlfriend but having no ability to converse is no good.

I envy those people who can talk about anything and make simple topics into conversation. I find i am a conversation killer, like i will answer ''Yes'' ''no'' ''fine thankyou'' etc.

I think i make people uncomfortable, like in my karate class a lady asked me how i was and i just said ''i'm ok thanks'' when i know damn well she was hoping for a longer convo.

Yeah! Pretty much, well said.
It's like if you were to have a friend with social anxiety, there would probably be more to talk about than normal, you'd have things to say because you'd be thinking about these things and you'd be able to think out loud about them

Oh I also want to add that having extra energy is very important if your goal is to be social. With spare energy, that's usually where people get their playfulness, joking-ness, exuberant-ness, expressiveness, and the louder want-to-share-and-be-heard voice to their thoughts (IMO). So it helps to exercise to build up your energy reserve, get enough rest, eat well so you're not expending all your energy on digesting harsh foods and chemicals, etc

 

[Silatuyok]

The only people I really hang out with are family members, so it's easier to find things to talk about. When I'm around other people I talk about animals or gardening, because those are things I am interested in. You can always comment on the weather, and this usually leads to some other more interesting topic, like what to do on a rainy day, or how do enjoy a nice day, or gardening, or animals...

 

[coyote]

i talk about myself mostly

apparently, i'm endlessly fascinating

if i'm really bored, i'll ask about THEM

and let them hog all the glory talking about THEMselves

 

[mushroomface]

Talk about the news, TV shows, Films or many some interesting facts about nature?