University is almost over. I am almost on honor roll but I don't feel proud

[zav943]

Four years...they were supposed to be the "best years of my life"...gone. Not a single non-academic achievement. Not a single true friend. Not a single girlfriend. Nothing.

In four months, I'll be an engineer, with a degree from a respectable school, and yet I feel like a failure.

I know a lot of people here didn't get a chance to go to university/college because of much more serious SA issues. In case you're not sure, it's supposed to be a very social environment...it provides you with an opportunity to actually lead a social life. But between schoolwork and social ineptitude, I came out with nothing. But believe me, I tried...I reached out, I yelled out, but no one responded. No one wants to be my friend.

As I walked home from the gym today, it dawned on me that, if I can't make friends here, how am I going to survive later on in life? I am truly terrified of the future..

 

[Sial Axetder]

Well, stop worrying. What's done is done. You've got your skills learned? Can we apply those to a respectable job? Engineering? Work on that. Once settled in, find free time, social time.

I know, not greatest advice. Cut me some slack. Usually I don't offer advice --- don't know know how to.

Others may have better ideas.

 

[3lefts]

I think it's good advice.
Worrying only makes anxiety and fears about the future worse, try not to focus so much on the future and focus on the now. The thing about trying is that it is not enough to have tried. If you want something, the trouble is the continuous effort you have to put into it, so just keep trying.
You still have four months left! That is plenty enough.
You might even make a lot of friends in your career, because of all the people you'll have to associate with.
Focus on what you enjoy in life right now. In my thoughts the only things that matter are the things you want or enjoy and working towards them.

 

[LazyHermitCrab]

you have a great degree, you should be really proud you can make some friends at work maybe buy drinks and play golf or something lol don't worry you don't have to be in college to make friends

 

[slowmotiondaydream]

i hear ya. ive been at university for 2 years now. i've tried SO hard to make friends but i've given up last semester. on a rare occasion someone comes up to me but then i loose them in the crowd again

 

[awkwardamanda]

I know how it feels. I spent six years at university and I feel like all I got out of it was knowledge and stress. I did not make a single friend. The few people I talked to on occasion were merely acquaintances. I had a couple of friends whom I already knew that I saw around campus now and then but mostly I sat around by myself while I wasn't in class. I had no balance at all in life. I was constantly stressed. I was always doing homework. It was a struggle to try and do well and often I just got by. I had no time or energy for a social life. I was severely lacking sleep. I couldn't work very efficiently. It was so hard to focus on my schoolwork because I was so stressed out and miserable. University or college should be about so much more than academics. It should be about the whole experience. It's a chance to make friends, begin networking in your chosen field, gain life skills and have fun too. It wasn't that at all for me. I didn't get to know anyone in my classes, even though they were small and often had a lot of the same people. I usually just sat there minding my own business. Often I saw my classmates talking, hanging out, and studying together outside of class. I wanted to be a part of that. I wanted to get to know them but I failed miserably. It made me sad. I felt very out of the loop. I didn't get to know any of my profs either. Many of them knew me by name but I rarely went to see them outside of class. I was too shy and too stubborn. Even when I was lost in the class, I did everything on my own. I was embarrassed to go get help. It was only during my last term of school that I realized I was depressed and had been all along. So many things got in the way of me being successful in school and in life. I graduated last spring with a degree in applied math. Here I am, a year and a half later, without having applied for a single job. I'm still working at a crappy retail job because I have no motivation to find something else. I dread sending out resumes. I dread the interviews. I dread having to get references from hell knows who. I don't know how to get a job. School should open doors. But I really don't know what sort of career path I'll end up taking. Most likely I'll settle in the end for something I'm overqualified for, or just unhappy with, because I won't want to keep looking for something good. Whatever. We'll see what happens.