TooShyShy, you're awesome. I registered to reply to a couple of your threads because I really think there's potential to do good for you, and others on here with the discussions that come up in them.
For the shy guy you're after - of course I don't know how everyone thinks, but this is my two cents at least; I don't have it as bad as many on here, but it has pretty much prevented any romance for decades...
If he tenses up and goes to hide, I'd say let him - he probably needs time to settle his mind and figure out what just happened. Even if he rejects you, take it in stride and watch how he acts - he'd probably be in a world of mental conflict if that happened, and his self esteem would beat itself up. But do keep making small gestures if you want him to warm up - most important is that you still be there for him, though I'm sure it's hard for you as well. Putting myself in his shoes, I'd say if you want to cut your losses and leave, do it early and clearly, but if you don't want to hurt him terribly, try to finish what you start.
As for physical contact - YES, keep it up! I'm just learning now that I ought to actually try this more often with girls I like - even little things like standing close and touching arms, or touching an elbow or shoulder when talking. It's a good gauge of how they feel, and a good way to get closer emotionally as well. In fact, I think the reason touch is so taboo is because we can't help but communicate volumes to each other both ways when it happens. (Phobic guys: My theory is if you're close enough to disclose pretty personal info, you're at least close enough to touch casually.) I'd normally never initiate a touch though because as I was taught, if you so much as breathe the same air as a girl, she could nail you with sexual harassment - if not a lawsuit, then rumors and slander. I know logically that this isn't the case, but I have no sense of where to draw the line, so I stay cautious, to my detriment.
I actually was bullied in school to the point where I thought dating was simply something that only applied to other people, because who would want me? ...but it was when a girl I liked hugged me a couple times that it sort of jolted me to my senses and made me think that first of all, I had to do what it takes to get another hug! (lol) Also, whether or not she was interested in me, that I too could have that kind of relationship, so I'd say it's very important! Ironically, it was around then that I realized if I just waited around for a girl to show interest in me that most likely, I would live in solitude my whole life, and that I was just incredibly lucky to even have such a chance. (Even then, that only happened because we were buddies online for a few years and I made sure to keep in touch! So guys - pay attention - if you do not take at least SOME action, you will probably get nothing in return.)
I think one reason some guys will shy away from touch like that is because they're so used to anything like that being a setup just to tear them down again, so they immediately wonder what's really going on. As a kid, I was naive and trusting and basically wanted to be everyone's friend, so "people" would befriend me only to string me along for a week or two and use what they'd learned to crush me all the harder with it. So if a guy seems freaked out when you show interest in him, he may actually be thrilled on one hand, but his mind could be shouting "it's a trap! This doesn't happen in real life!"
You also seem to be on the ball with the little gifts like cookies too. The girl I like gave me a little random item one time and while I was totally caught off guard and unsure what to think, I did give one back the next chance I had, and we still swap small things from time to time.
If you're pretty sure he likes you, and you're basically friends, when he gets comfortable enough you might try asking him on a not-quite-date? Maybe get a friend or two - say, a couple - and ask him if he wants to come along with you guys to a show or local event for something he likes or something? This I'm not so sure of because I can take personal interactions fairly naturally, I just never initiate, but it's a clear show of interest (of some kind.) I've gone along with those too, but sadly haven't planned one yet myself to ask her back. The problem for me is that I never know if I'm a buddy or potentially more, and I'm afraid if I play my cards wrong, I'll just end up further in the wrong category, and with the pressure of her friends around every time I see her, I end up not making any moves at all, even telling her she looks nice *facepalm*
Also, if someone falls into limerence, they're basically blinded by emotions and even more unable to tell if someone's interested in them, or if that's just their brain trying to trick them into taking action...
Anyway, I hope this ramble helps to understand this anxious mindset a bit better!