xDreamseller
Well-known member
I've always known that I appear to people, differently than how I think I actually am in my head because of my shyness. Tonight, that was re-affirmed after work. My shift had just finished and my dad had asked me to bring cigarettes home for him. I asked to buy them and straight away, all my co-workers burst out with "holy sh#t, you smoke?!?!?", as if it was inconceivable that I would do such a thing. The same response as when they found out I don't go to church and I drink.
I feel like people think of me as this: Carlton Banks
Now, I'm not saying that there is anything wrong with people like that and truth be told, it does work in my favor at times. Most people believe anything I say, luckily for them, I'm not one to lie about things. It's just not who I am though. I'm just too shy to be who I am in my mind. This means that I have a terrible time making friends. I don't enjoy spending time with the people who are like how I appear, as we have nothing in common and the people I have stuff in common with will never know we have stuff in common because I'm too shy.
Music is probably the most important thing to me, so what I've been doing recently to try and counter this "problem" is wearing my heavy metal tee's, playing my music loud enough so others can hear it through my earphones and stuff like that. It's stupid and the music thing is really obnoxious but I think that's more like who I really am. The 14 year old in my head is kicking and screaming that he wants let out but my 5 year old shyness isn't letting it out. I've always been shy, for as long as I can remember. I don't know how it started or why. It's just been a constant in my life.
Any suggestions on how to overcome shyness or change how I come off to people would be nice. Hell, if I could come across to people as to how I really am, being shy wouldn't be a problem to me.
I feel like people think of me as this: Carlton Banks
Now, I'm not saying that there is anything wrong with people like that and truth be told, it does work in my favor at times. Most people believe anything I say, luckily for them, I'm not one to lie about things. It's just not who I am though. I'm just too shy to be who I am in my mind. This means that I have a terrible time making friends. I don't enjoy spending time with the people who are like how I appear, as we have nothing in common and the people I have stuff in common with will never know we have stuff in common because I'm too shy.
Music is probably the most important thing to me, so what I've been doing recently to try and counter this "problem" is wearing my heavy metal tee's, playing my music loud enough so others can hear it through my earphones and stuff like that. It's stupid and the music thing is really obnoxious but I think that's more like who I really am. The 14 year old in my head is kicking and screaming that he wants let out but my 5 year old shyness isn't letting it out. I've always been shy, for as long as I can remember. I don't know how it started or why. It's just been a constant in my life.
Any suggestions on how to overcome shyness or change how I come off to people would be nice. Hell, if I could come across to people as to how I really am, being shy wouldn't be a problem to me.