someone says something to you, you smile and nod, they walk away, no longer in site, your expression melts to expressionless. Happens sometimes. Often wondered where to post but avoided it. Many people, many ideas and commments. What will be said? I don't know. I don't like not knowing.
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Wishmaster
Well-known member
Welcome to the forums. 
That is actually a pretty deep thing to think about... Reminds me of a movie called Waking Life.
That is actually a pretty deep thing to think about... Reminds me of a movie called Waking Life.True, they do not. Still doesn't help. What is said and to be said are two different areas. Often it is too late to think what is to be said. If you haven't said it, nothing in return. For what has been said, what to expect in return?
On the net, like this, it is easier to backspace and, hopefully, make it right. Out in Socialworld, someone backspacing would look odd.
My apologies. Normally I am more... random. As in Socialworld. Here possibly I can be me.
On the net, like this, it is easier to backspace and, hopefully, make it right. Out in Socialworld, someone backspacing would look odd.
My apologies. Normally I am more... random. As in Socialworld. Here possibly I can be me.
Exactly, split describes it nicely. I am stuck in a circle, again. One who wants to be a certain way is not the same as who one really is. Isn't that still an act? A cover?
Perhaps I misunderstood the point. I admit this does happen.
Wishmaster, I forgot to reply to your message: Main hobby, requires no socializing whatsoever, is watching movies. Waking Life, I have not seen. IMDB doesn't help me. Is it good?
Perhaps I misunderstood the point. I admit this does happen.
Wishmaster, I forgot to reply to your message: Main hobby, requires no socializing whatsoever, is watching movies. Waking Life, I have not seen. IMDB doesn't help me. Is it good?
Wishmaster
Well-known member
I haven't actually seen the full movie all at once, rather bits and pieces of it on youtube. If you just search it you will find it. It really is best viewed in little pieces, because it really does make you think. The youtube comments section is a nice place to read after you watch the vids, too. It is very good. It's about a guy in his dream and he can't wake up and he has conversations with these very intelligent people.
Wishmaster
Well-known member
P.S. Tell me what you think about it. Or anybody for that matter.
Or anybody for that matter.Act?.... I see it as survival mode.
Problem being were helping avoidance survive by holding back and wondering what he or she is thinking or saying about us.
I get angry at my self these days for obeying avoidance.
Yes I'm a lot heathly (mentally) these days so I can do things for me.
The hard bit is breaking the avoidance grip and have control over Avpd and not the other way round.
Regards Darryl
Problem being were helping avoidance survive by holding back and wondering what he or she is thinking or saying about us.
I get angry at my self these days for obeying avoidance.
Yes I'm a lot heathly (mentally) these days so I can do things for me.
The hard bit is breaking the avoidance grip and have control over Avpd and not the other way round.
Regards Darryl
Darryl, I do apprecieate what you say. Even with my job which forces interaction with others it is still quite hard to interact. I rarely get comments about the way I act so I must be doing something right. Those thoughts will never leave, I know that, too.
Tell me, large gathering, ceremony of some kind a party, not really,more of an event. You get there, alone, you know only one. He/she/it didn't make it. Feeling annoyed, odd, refer back to first post - many people. Choose to leave, no one knows. Choose to stay and ignore. Choose to what?
Tell me, large gathering, ceremony of some kind a party, not really,more of an event. You get there, alone, you know only one. He/she/it didn't make it. Feeling annoyed, odd, refer back to first post - many people. Choose to leave, no one knows. Choose to stay and ignore. Choose to what?
coyote
Well-known member
Maybe choose to use the opportunity to work on yourself.
Recognize your fears, name them, understand them, drag them out under the cold light of the room, and expose them for what they really are, take away their power....
Free yourself.
Then do what you would do if you weren't afraid to.
It could turn out to be the best night of your life.
Recognize your fears, name them, understand them, drag them out under the cold light of the room, and expose them for what they really are, take away their power....
Free yourself.
Then do what you would do if you weren't afraid to.
It could turn out to be the best night of your life.
you mean better than a bottle of saki and a BR movie? I don't know. It would be tough to be beat that.
No, I know. I become difficult to help when I am avoiding something. There's always something to avoid.
I will take your advice, what will happen, I don't know. I hate not knowing.
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No, I know. I become difficult to help when I am avoiding something. There's always something to avoid.
I will take your advice, what will happen, I don't know. I hate not knowing.
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coyote
Well-known member
Ahhh yes, I know that path very well.
Your going to struggle if you go or stay.
If you have to be there, fake it until you make it.
You need to learn as much as possible about avoidance, so you understand how it controls you.
You need to reconise avoidance (as Coyote said) treat it as a seperate identity-Your decisions or Avoidance decisions.
You need to work on "because I want to, not because avoidance tells me"
Avoidance will always be part of your life, you just need to manage it by not having undoing thoughts-such as I wonder what their thinking of me or the like.
Make a decision and MOVE ON with-out disecting it.
Regardless what the outcome may be, or you will get swallowed up by avoidance.
Regards Darryl
If you have to be there, fake it until you make it.
You need to learn as much as possible about avoidance, so you understand how it controls you.
You need to reconise avoidance (as Coyote said) treat it as a seperate identity-Your decisions or Avoidance decisions.
You need to work on "because I want to, not because avoidance tells me"
Avoidance will always be part of your life, you just need to manage it by not having undoing thoughts-such as I wonder what their thinking of me or the like.
Make a decision and MOVE ON with-out disecting it.
Regardless what the outcome may be, or you will get swallowed up by avoidance.
Regards Darryl
Yes, the disecting I do, rather, did a ton of. That bit I have been working on for sometime as I knew, I know ... at least it felt like the bigger problem. Still happens though - circles.
I also avoid anything involving complements. Giving or otherwise. I can't fix that. I don't know if I want to.
It's like pulling or tugging at something from the inside out. Feeling moving but something pulls back. Makes teeth grit.
Done.
I also avoid anything involving complements. Giving or otherwise. I can't fix that. I don't know if I want to.
It's like pulling or tugging at something from the inside out. Feeling moving but something pulls back. Makes teeth grit.
Done.
It's hard work trying not to second guess everything.
I see it as walking out of a cave, everytime you don't disect the closer to the door way.
Ever noticed how quick avoidance is in making a decision?
I use this to my advantage... avoidance decision then I default it.
Remember, don't disect you decision, make it and move on.. regardless!
I see it as walking out of a cave, everytime you don't disect the closer to the door way.
Ever noticed how quick avoidance is in making a decision?
I use this to my advantage... avoidance decision then I default it.
Remember, don't disect you decision, make it and move on.. regardless!
agoraphobickatie
Well-known member
Also, I like Waking Life I watched it a few times. The main character is the guy that played Mitch from Dazed and Confused
he most definitely is!! i just watched some of it the other day and was like "damn... he looks like a mix between the kid from 'the paper brigade' and mitch from 'dazed and confused'!!" haha thanks
It is hard and at times confusing. Like I mentioned, circles. When it happens, I admit, I go expressionless and then avoid all. Just do what I have to do and exit.
Avoid is a quick decision maker. I'd like to be quick like that. But I have to spend extra time stomping Avoid out before I can.
If only there existed a way to disconnect and bypass.
Will try.
I have conflict. Or am I avoiding and become difficult? Anyway, AvPD says to exit and many times I want to exit. Wanting to stay is somewhere over there. What to do here? If I stay it will get worse.