most girls dislike me

AtTheGates

AtTheGates

Banned
I'm starting to think that part of the problem is that i don't have any real friends to just basically say "hey this guys alright" it really might be as simple as that except for a few other things that i need to improve about myself..but once I get on point then I think all I would REALLY need is someone to put in the good word for me and then at least I'd have a chance..I had a few friends some years back who would basically do the OPPOSITE of put in the good word so unfortunately I can't really trust anyone to say nice things about me...but anyway like i said, iv got other priorities I'm more worried about at the moment...I think I really would benefit from not thinking about girls so much...It ruins my train of thought sometimes.
 
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AtTheGates

AtTheGates

Banned
w*n*c*a*m said:
You prolly have a 'nerdy/geeky' aura.
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yeah i do. I'm definitely kind of a dork so I'm pretty much screwed from the get-go when it comes to talking to girls who are kind of airheaded but I don't even like those kinds of girls anyway....i mean I suppose I could get some tribal tattoos and drive around on a motorcycle wearing tap out shirts but I don't really want to try and attract the wrong kind of girls...it would just be like false advertising.
 
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w*n*c*a*m

Well-known member
AtTheGates said:
yeah i do. I'm definitely kind of a dork so I'm pretty much screwed from the get-go when it comes to talking to girls who are kind of airheaded but I don't even like those kinds of girls anyway....i mean I suppose I could get some tribal tattoos and drive around on a motorcycle wearing tap out shirts but I don't really want to try and attract the wrong kind of girls...it would just be like false advertising.
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Well, there's your answer.

And you don't have to get tattoos or drive a motorcycle to be likeable.
 
AlienGeranium

AlienGeranium

Well-known member
When you say women dislike you, do you mean all women or the ones you are would consider for a romantic relationship? Because unless you're a huge **** I can't imagine every girl just hating you (and even then I would think guys would hate you too). I don't really know you, or the situations you are in when meeting them, but I feel there must be some sort of explanation that makes sense.
 
Richey

Richey

Well-known member
I think people make rash judgements on themselves based on their small world off of work and college experience. Maybe the girls that work with you or in your uni class, whatever, maybe they aren't a match for you. The world is a much bigger place than that.

The only way to really find other people is to have a busier social/entertainment life. Such as, going to concerts, festivals, sporting events, galleries, museum events, night classes, just going and doing things and that's how you potentially meet other people. Better chance anyway then if somebody just goes to work then home, rinse repeat.

The women that work in my department tend to be very arrogant and extroverted, i know the guys they like "they talk about it". So i know that my match probably isn't their personality type, though i can be funny. My working world is tiny compared to the outside world.

There are loads of geeky couples out there and variations of that.

I think the key is to just get more exposure to living a more social/entertainment based life, outside of work/study. This takes alot of energy, so maybe getting fit would help with stamina to build a social/hobby/entertainment life.
 
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Foxie913

Foxie913

Well-known member
AtTheGates said:
I see a couple out of the corner of my eye and they're publicly nuzzling....then I just get depressed.
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God I hate witnessing that too. I've never had a boyfriend because I'm not really attractive to the opposite sex either so when I see couples being affectionate I want to spit flames of envy. Being seen as ugly by the opposite sex really kills the self-esteem. Mine is so low it drags along the ground when I walk. :crying:
 
ScaredToBreathe

ScaredToBreathe

Well-known member
I'm sure not all the girls you meet are mean to you. Are they directly saying rude things to you on purpose? Or could it be they just come off as rude because they misunderstood something or are just in a bad mood? Or is it just your interpretation of the situation? Are you uncomfortable around girls or act uninterested/withdrawn? They may think you don't want anything to do with them and reflect that attitude.
For girls, it usually doesn't matter what you look like, but unfortunately they usually pay most attention to your voice, body language, speech, and level of confidence and humour. If you smile and act like nothing's bothering you and maybe make a joke, that might help (I know it's easier said than done).
Remember, a lot of people are very ignorant of others and may come off as rude, toxic people, which means the problem lies with them, not you. They are the ones being mean human beings, not you, right? If they are generally just rude people, why bother trying to make them like you anyways?
I'd try maybe meeting girls at an arcade or convention or something that interests you (nerdy girls I find are more mellow and accepting anyways aha). Just be yourself, no need to change for people who aren't worth it. Non-judgemental people try to accept everyone, despite differences. Good luck
 
SilentBird

SilentBird

Well-known member
If you identify yourself as a certain type of person you might attract someone who is a similar type.

I don't identify myself as anything therefore fear that I am not compatible with anyone.
 
Bronson99

Bronson99

Well-known member
AtTheGates said:
I'm shopping for groceries by myself or doing some menial errand and I see a couple out of the corner of my eye and they're publicly nuzzling....then I just get depressed
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I deal with this by splashing 'em with water.::p:

I mean this really shouldn't be allowed, when one considers the many lonely/envious people out there. It makes them look selfish and inconsiderate.
 
Megaten

Megaten

Well-known member
Bronson99 said:
I deal with this by splashing 'em with water.::p:

I mean this really shouldn't be allowed, when one considers the many lonely/envious people out there. It makes them look selfish and inconsiderate.
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Lol you think thats rough, dont go to house parties. I've had the privilege of hearing a few of my friends get lucky in the next room over. The water hose wasnt long enough to reach.
 
Bronson99

Bronson99

Well-known member
Megaten said:
Lol you think thats rough, dont go to house parties. I've had the privilege of hearing a few of my friends get lucky in the next room over. The water hose wasnt long enough to reach.
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Fists will suffice, in that case. Time to teach 'em a lesson, eh?
 
H

Hilken

New member
I'm a loner, and I think unless you're Brad Pitt, then the lack of 'social proof' will work against you. For example, when I was younger I had loads of friends - both male and female. I used to get more looks from women, and even approached, as they'd see me in a social circle, and this kinda relays to them that you must be ok.

I hope to move to another country where women are much more approachable, friendly, and just up for a good time.
 
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NamiraWilhelm

Well-known member
It's so interesting how for so many men on this site the main source of anxiety, the main point of focus, is that strange alien known as a female (if you'd believe their accounts of us anyway! Countless threads on this site of women being spoken about like a completely separate species).

I mean it's not generally likewise is it :question: For women it's.. well, kind of everything else! Emotions, family, self opinion...
 
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