It's simple

[Mokkat]

It's not simple, lol. If it was, none of us would be here because we would have followed that advice to the letter the first time we heard it

 

[JamesSmith]

Exactly. That´s what I wanted to say as well, people who don´t have this will never understand that it´s not a fear of what other people think. I couldn´t care less, in fact I got used to the thought others think I am an idiot. But this is irrational, the awkwardness is just a feeling in the body, for example I have huge difficulty with eye contact, it causes me a lot of stress.. It´s tiring, stressfull.. It´s as if something suffocated you all the time when you´re with people.

Yes, finally someone can relate to me. You're right, what others think about us is not the issue here. It's just being around people that causes anxiety automatically for people with bad social anxiety disorder. People seem to think there is some underlying special psychological factor from our thoughts that explains our problems. The explanation is actually as simple as we automatically feel uncomfortable around people no matter what we are thinking or what they are thinking. I'm never relaxed, even when I'm by myself. I have this automatic tension habit that i've had my whole life. Yes, it's suffocating. It's literally harder for me to breathe than most people, even when alone.

 

[Hastings & Main]

I'm getting through this because of thinking like that as well. Ever since finding this site, I've done nothing but improve. Well, hit a couple rocks here and there (like skateboarding, getting better at it while taking away some flesh once in a while to make you remember what pain is), but with practice and constantly reminding yourself you get used to it and the 24/7 worrying gets less intense & slowly dissolves.

Right now I can't even believe that I used to be afraid to pull the cord on the bus for my stop, mentally calling someone else to do it as I had a fear of people shifting their sight to me.
WTF? "Look at the loser. Getting off at this stop. Psh". Is that what I was afraid of? Nowadays I yell down the aisle at the driver if he/she doesn't open the door for me.
And 'tis the season for my SAD to kick in, but it's the mildest yet.

Getting better at the daunting eye-contact thing as well. I found that it comes in slight increments, not some sudden overnight change like we all want.

 

[Overload]

It's not simple, lol. If it was, none of us would be here because we would have followed that advice to the letter the first time we heard it

Simple, but not easy. The simplest things are often the most difficult.

 

[MollyBeGood]

I'm getting through this because of thinking like that as well. Ever since finding this site, I've done nothing but improve. Well, hit a couple rocks here and there (like skateboarding, getting better at it while taking away some flesh once in a while to make you remember what pain is), but with practice and constantly reminding yourself you get used to it and the 24/7 worrying gets less intense & slowly dissolves.

Right now I can't even believe that I used to be afraid to pull the cord on the bus for my stop, mentally calling someone else to do it as I had a fear of people shifting their sight to me.
WTF? "Look at the loser. Getting off at this stop. Psh". Is that what I was afraid of? Nowadays I yell down the aisle at the driver if he/she doesn't open the door for me.
And 'tis the season for my SAD to kick in, but it's the mildest yet.

Getting better at the daunting eye-contact thing as well. I found that it comes in slight increments, not some sudden overnight change like we all want.

I love this story "nowadays I yell down at the driver!" hehe thats great!