Little Miss Muffet
Well-known member
Hiya guys im just wondering if its possible to be mates with an ex? IF you broke up with them and they want to be mates do you think they might want to be friends in the hope that youll get back together?
Is it possible to be mates with an ex?
- Thread starter Little Miss Muffet
- Start date
Agent_Violet
Well-known member
i think it depends on the people really.
i'm friends with my son's father bc I have to get along with him so my son has a peaceful childhood and is raised in a calm parental environment.
if my husband and i ever split up..i'd say with confidence we could remain friends bc that's the type of person he is and I'm comfortable enough with him to go along with it.
As for other ex's...no way would I EVER be friends with them.
You have to decide what's best for you as far as boundaries and friendship is concerned. I think it's best to be up front with the other person if there is no hope of rekindling the relationship...they need to know that in the clearest,kindest of ways.
i'm friends with my son's father bc I have to get along with him so my son has a peaceful childhood and is raised in a calm parental environment.
if my husband and i ever split up..i'd say with confidence we could remain friends bc that's the type of person he is and I'm comfortable enough with him to go along with it.
As for other ex's...no way would I EVER be friends with them.
You have to decide what's best for you as far as boundaries and friendship is concerned. I think it's best to be up front with the other person if there is no hope of rekindling the relationship...they need to know that in the clearest,kindest of ways.
Felgen
Well-known member
I think it depends on the person. I'm not friends with any of my exes (except for maybe my last one, but I'm never really sure what she wants) and when I've been told that an ex wants to be "just friends", it means that she just wants an emotional tampon she can bother once a month when nobody wants to take her BS. I told my previous ex-girlfriend that I want to be her friend, but that I don't want to be her emotional tampon and I think she agrees with me.
My exes....as in the relationship ones....not casual ones.... are good friends bar one who has a very insecure gf but thats ok and were still on friendly terms just dont meet up cos she is understandably upset by it. I get that. But in every other case they make up what is the circle of closest friends. There is no down the road (for me) when its over, its over. I love my friends dearly though and they are very pure friendships that I assign great value to as do they.
Section_31
Well-known member
Theres only one ex im friends with, and thats because i met my wife through her. Were all very good friends now and i dont have any feelings left for the other girl, but its still awkward every now and then.
Luckily we dont see eachother hardly at all, mabye once or twice a yr.
Luckily we dont see eachother hardly at all, mabye once or twice a yr.
this_portrait
Well-known member
My ex and I still keep in contact with each other. In my case, I was the one who was broken up with. It isn't TOO awkward, though the last time we saw each other, it was pretty awkward. I think it's just going to take time for me to get to the point where I don't feel awkward around him. I don't know if I'll ever really be 100% over him; I feel like there's always going to be a part of me that still loves him.
So yes, I think it's possible, if the effort is put into it and there isn't too much emotional damage.
So yes, I think it's possible, if the effort is put into it and there isn't too much emotional damage.
Little Miss Muffet
Well-known member
I think its brilliant that you and your sons father are able to maintain an amicable relationship.
Hypothetically - What if you began a new relationship with someone else and they had a problem with you being friends with an ex? I will post this question as a thread.
Thanks for repying again
Dead_on_Arrival
Well-known member
I can't be friends with any of my ex's because my wife is
hugely paranoid already. That would end in a messy
divorce.
hugely paranoid already. That would end in a messy
divorce.
I have no experience with this area.
But I would say if you want to, why not?
Its deinitely POSSIBLE. Anything is possible in this way. Its only not "possible" to you if you live by made up social rules that say "this person is officialy an "ex" or your in a relationship with them, or they're just a friend, and that if they're one of these you can do this this and this, and if the other this etc.....And that you've got to do this or that, in general.
I hate these rules. Thats why although i miss out on the nice aspects, and things I'd like to do, like intimacy, I dont want a "girlfriend". Ive viewed other people and the messes they get into. I have enough to deal with myself. I just don't wanna get into the whole usual game. Of course for many other people I'm sure its great and works well however. It depends on what YOU/I want.
But I would say if you want to, why not?
Its deinitely POSSIBLE. Anything is possible in this way. Its only not "possible" to you if you live by made up social rules that say "this person is officialy an "ex" or your in a relationship with them, or they're just a friend, and that if they're one of these you can do this this and this, and if the other this etc.....And that you've got to do this or that, in general.
I hate these rules. Thats why although i miss out on the nice aspects, and things I'd like to do, like intimacy, I dont want a "girlfriend". Ive viewed other people and the messes they get into. I have enough to deal with myself. I just don't wanna get into the whole usual game. Of course for many other people I'm sure its great and works well however. It depends on what YOU/I want.
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