Satine
Well-known member
I was on a bit of a Google foray the other day and found this page on a bullying tecnique called invalidation. I was staggered because this is what I dealt with from my parents all the way through my childhood and it's the reason I still avoid them now, I realise at last.
Invalidation: just that. Anything you see, feel, experience, you are told is not valid, not acceptable. That you should have experienced it or responded to it another way, or less, or more. This is what I was told, what the people around me did. Just one word that seems to be such an umbrella term because it covers so much, and yet sums it all up so succinctly.
I've spent a few days thinking through a lot of past stuff and managed to put it into a different perspective. A lot more things seem to make sense to me. And, it seems, I'm not as mad as I thought I was. Which is a relief.
I realise that these things aren't always as helpful to one person as they are to another, but I just wanted to put this link up here to see if it's any help to anyone else.
Invalidation: just that. Anything you see, feel, experience, you are told is not valid, not acceptable. That you should have experienced it or responded to it another way, or less, or more. This is what I was told, what the people around me did. Just one word that seems to be such an umbrella term because it covers so much, and yet sums it all up so succinctly.
I've spent a few days thinking through a lot of past stuff and managed to put it into a different perspective. A lot more things seem to make sense to me. And, it seems, I'm not as mad as I thought I was. Which is a relief.
I realise that these things aren't always as helpful to one person as they are to another, but I just wanted to put this link up here to see if it's any help to anyone else.