I wish I could believe in a god or higher power.... But I just can't.

I don't want this to become a controversial thread. I'm genuinely just etching out my frustrations with life and trying to get my thoughts about this down and see if anyone here can relate to what I am saying. I don't want to offend anyone; we all have our own beliefs and I respect that.

It would be nice to at least go through life believing that after I die, I'll live on and see my family again for eternity. I like that idea. Or the belief that there is a higher being watching over me, or a guardian angel looking out for me. But I just don't believe it. I know I'm alone in this world, and the only people I can depend on are myself and my mother. That's it.

Like the other night, some people broke into my home. I was alone, and I had an intense struggle to keep them out. No one was there to save me. Only I saved myself.

My grandpa tonight on the phone told me to just "have faith," that this is all I can do. But the only faith that I can have is in myself. I used to pray when I was a believer, but none of my prayers were answered, no matter how hard I prayed, no matter how much faith I had. I learned that I am the only one I can depend on to get things done.

Having faith in such a higher power wouldn't cure my anxiety. I mean, look at how many people deal with mental disorders including SAD, GAD, etc. who are believers. But having faith would at least make life a little more... well.... something....

But once I've become an atheist, there's no turning back. I question everything; I'm a hard-line skeptic. Nothing could ever convince me that there is a god, unless god came to me him-/her-/itself. I even prayed a few years ago, when I was in my final transition from believer to atheist, and I begged god to show him/her/itself to me.... actually I demanded it. I wanted to know and deserved to know for sure. It may seem childish to some, but it was the final straw for me.

I think what I am lacking most in life is a community. It's not only the 'faith' aspect of it that attracts me. It's more the feeling of community, the lack of which makes life almost unbearable.

I don't want this to become a controversial thread. I'm genuinely just etching out my frustrations with life and trying to get my thoughts about this down and see if anyone here can relate to what I am saying. I don't want to offend anyone; we all have our own beliefs and I respect that.
 

PennyLane

Well-known member
I know what you mean...I often think this too. One of my best friends is a very strong Christian and she prays for things all the time and 'leans' on god. Sometimes I think this must be reassuring but on the other hand I also think it is just a crutch for those who can't deal with things by themselves.

Like you I mean no offence its just in my head I think...well wouldn't we all love to believe (especially as we're lonely) that some all powerful being is listening to everything we have to say and loves us unconditionally and will help us anyway possible. Its sounds extremely self indulgent to me and just wishful thinking.

The best line I ever heard..I forget where...was if god didn't exist we would invent him. We just dont like the thought of being alone and being insignificant...

I think we have to take responsibility for ourselves and that break in should prove to you that you've done that and you are capable after all :)
 

thor01

Well-known member
Yeah I get what you're saying too. That must have been scary having your house broken into, when you're alone. You must have been brave to keep them out. I don't really have a fixed belief in this area. I've always questioned things in the Catholic religion I was brought up in since I was small, and wondered about what God is and weather it exists. I now quite like the theory that God, or whatever you want to call it, is everything and we are all part of God, that everything is one, rather than God being a completely separate thing that people must worship, otherwise go to hell. The main religions to me are partly just to keep people in a limited thinking/way of life, to help control, and divide them.
 
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Avery

Well-known member
But once I've become an atheist, there's no turning back. I question everything; I'm a hard-line skeptic. Nothing could ever convince me that there is a god, unless god came to me him-/her-/itself. I even prayed a few years ago, when I was in my final transition from believer to atheist, and I begged god to show him/her/itself to me.... actually I demanded it. I wanted to know and deserved to know for sure. It may seem childish to some, but it was the final straw for me.

I think what I am lacking most in life is a community. It's not only the 'faith' aspect of it that attracts me. It's more the feeling of community, the lack of which makes life almost unbearable.

I could have written this. We're alike on each point.

I gave up my faith several years ago, and have since then only had my atheism more deeply entrenched, but I'm not under the illusion that I'm happier or more fulfilled because of it. Religion brings hope as well as faith, and who can ever have enough hope? But for me it's impossible to be religious now -- as you say, only the actual appearance of the supernatural could sway me at this point, even though I'd welcome said swaying.

It's a bit odd for me, because I'm essentially "Christian" in behavior -- out of my entire extended family, I'm the only one (save for my brothers, and they got it from me) who's atheist, and yet I'm the honest, teetotaling, responsible family man. I have an alcoholic, pot-smoking, and formerly wife-beating relative who will argue with me about the merits of Christianity, and the positive effect it has on people's lives. It's a bit ridiculous.

But yeah, overall I disagree with many other atheists on this point, who extol the more perfect justice of a godless world. I agree instead with the religious opposition -- a God-governed, balanced and ordered and (ultimately) just universe really is a better, more hopeful one. Too bad it's not the one we're living in.
 

Acme

Well-known member
I hear ya. I was very religious for the first 18 years of my life as my parents were and it was all I knew. After I moved out of that environment and got out on my own, I started questioning things and looking at things the way they really are through common sense / logic / simple observation, and over time became atheist. I would rather look at things the way they are, no matter how good/bad/etc they might be, than try to get myself to believe in something that isn't true. I just don't need any denial or illusions or the internal conflict that results from them.

You gotta protect and save yourself - no one else is gonna do it for you. Back in my early 20's, the only thing that pulled me out of a hole of deep despair and saved me when I reached my breaking point was myself.

I have nothing against people who are religious and am cool with them all the same, just as long as their religion isn't causing them to hurt anyone, and as long as they aren't trying to throw their religion on me.
 

Sinar_Matahari

Well-known member
I can't say that I am religious just because I believe in God. I don't care for the bible, church attendanc etc...My belief in God has sustained me when I was going through some dark times.
 

Sinar_Matahari

Well-known member
I know what you mean...I often think this too. One of my best friends is a very strong Christian and she prays for things all the time and 'leans' on god. Sometimes I think this must be reassuring but on the other hand I also think it is just a crutch for those who can't deal with things by themselves.

Isn't it a bit insulting to say that people who believe in God can't deal with things by themselves? There are plenty of people here who cannot deal with things on their own whether they believe in God or not. I, for one believe in God but I don't expect him to cure me or fix my problems. For somone to claim otherwise would be an insult to my intelligence.

I think we have to take responsibility for ourselves...

So people who find hope and comfort in their belief do not take responsibility for themselves? I've met religious people who did more than take responsibility for themselves but also took the time to help others. Religion has such a bad rap that people who believe in God are considered delusional weaklings and it's just as unfair as religious loonies thinking that a person will going to go to hell for not believing in Jesus, being gay etc...
 

PennyLane

Well-known member
Isn't it a bit insulting to say that people who believe in God can't deal with things by themselves? There are plenty of people here who cannot deal with things on their own whether they believe in God or not. I, for one believe in God but I don't expect him to cure me or fix my problems. For somone to claim otherwise would be an insult to my intelligence.

So people who find hope and comfort in their belief do not take responsibility for themselves? I've met religious people who did more than take responsibility for themselves but also took the time to help others. Religion has such a bad rap that people who believe in God are considered delusional weaklings and it's just as unfair as religious loonies thinking that a person will going to go to hell for not believing in Jesus, being gay etc...

Hey sorry, it wasn't meant to be insulting. I apologise if it offended you. I was really basing this assumption on one person, my friend. She believes to make something better in her life...she should pray. I find this a little passive thats all. I would hardly be one to state anyone else is weak either...especially as im clearly not doing so well in my own life.

Once again, sorry, didn't mean anything by it...it was just an uninformed opinion. C
 

stand_up

Well-known member
To deal with burgulars all you need is a good weapon. And some intelligence to understand what is and is not exessive force.

What if "God" is not as narrowly described by the common people? What if "God" really meant powers that doesn't represent an idol, image, entity nor being?...Instead represent universal love or hope under everything?

I guess what I'm trying to say is that we don't have to join the club, or be a member of this or that brand of religion....We can still benefit from universal values and principles taught rather than focussing on: "Who is God", "Is he real?", "What is his name?" and "Where did he come from?". ....

From a religion (any kind) we can take what we feel is relevant to our lives and apply it to our contexts... and chuck the rest that we don't need or doubt.
 

Flowers-Of-Bloom

Well-known member
I wish I could believe in a god or higher power.... But I just can't.

I think the fact that I believe in Christianity only increases my anxiety. Why? Knowing that the supernatural exists? That there are malicious spirits who want to destroy me? Knowing sin, that afterlife there are only two realms, and that the path to the righteous is narrow, while the path to (eternal) death is far and wide. Know that, if I die I now, then I will be thrust into darkness, tortured until the end of everything that is hell and thrust into the river of fire WHERE I WILL CEASE TO EXIST!!!


...sorry.


I've believed in God ever since I was young, since my mother was Christian. I've read things, seen things, heard things, felt things and it all makes sense. But let me tell you... No religion will help you unless you dedicate a fair-sized portion of your life to it. To God, as you are now, you are dead. Praying to Him now will do nothing. You cannot live of the world and expect Him to come to you.
Believing might be a small part of Christianity (or any religion, really), understanding, however, is essential.

Sometimes... I wish I was Atheist. Though, I cannot simply unbelieve everything.
 
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I think the fact that I believe in Christianity only increases my anxiety. Why? Knowing that the supernatural exists? That there are malicious spirits who want to destroy me?

A lot of belief systems, though, don't believe in malicious spirits. If my idea of god existed, this god would be a benevolent, loving, non-jealous god. But seeing the way the world is, that kind of god couldn't possibly exist, not with all the pain and suffering.

Knowing sin, that afterlife there are only two realms, and that the path to the righteous is narrow, while the path to (eternal) death is far and wide. Know that, if I die I now, then I will be thrust into darkness, tortured until the end of everything that is hell and thrust into the river of fire WHERE I WILL CEASE TO EXIST!!!

...sorry.

There are belief systems that don't believe in heaven and/or hell. Needless to say, I believe these are imaginary places, figments of the imagination, just another way to scare people into following religious leaders' teachings. It would be nice to know that there is 'another world' after we die where people who have led a good life go to live forever with their loved ones. You know.... being able to feel like you will see your loved ones again after we die. But I believe this life is it, nothing else exists after. But like I said before, sometimes, I think it would be a bit comforting to have such a blind faith.



I've believed in God ever since I was young, since my mother was Christian. I've read things, seen things, heard things, felt things and it all makes sense. But let me tell you... No religion will help you unless you dedicate a fair-sized portion of your life to it.

I was a Christian for 18 years, from birth, and have been 'sober' from Christianity for five now. I don't miss being a Christian, and I would never want to be religious again. The only thing I like about religion is that you have a sense of community, and that's what I crave, but nothing else about religion appeals to me. The only thing I miss about having faith, though, is finding that comfort that there may be someone (invisible) to talk to when I am lonely and depressed, when no one else would listen.

To God, as you are now, you are dead. Praying to Him now will do nothing. You cannot live of the world and expect Him to come to you.
Believing might be a small part of Christianity (or any religion, really), understanding, however, is essential.

Sometimes... I wish I was Atheist. Though, I cannot simply unbelieve everything.

I love being Atheist, don't get me wrong. I love to think for myself rather than believe what a religious leader or a holy book tells me. It was through rational thought and extensive questioning that led me to disbelief. The only thing I believe in is this life and making it worth while.

As for supposedly being dead to God, that doesn't hurt my feelings. I don't believe in any god, nor do I pray. I am a good person, I've never hurt anyone, I don't really "live of the world" as is the common misconception of atheists. I just live my life knowing that this is all there is, and I'd better make the best of it, although it can be difficult and almost unbearable at times, but that goes for people of faith too.

And even when I was religious, my prayers weren't answered, and I never understood how some people could speak in tongues or be 'filled with the holy spirit.' I would pray and pray to god for it, but it never happened. I just wasn't feeling it. I must be lacking that God Gene.
 
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From an atheist's perspective I think believing in a higher power definitely has its pros and cons, like the ones you guys have already discussed. For me as an atheist, I think of religion as a form of ignorance (of truth and logic). I tend to think of most religions as providing a "blissful" ignorance to their believers. A lot of religions make people feel better; make them stop worrying about things they have no control over or provide answers to questions they can't answer.
 
From an atheist's perspective I think believing in a higher power definitely has its pros and cons, like the ones you guys have already discussed. For me as an atheist, I think of religion as a form of ignorance (of truth and logic). I tend to think of most religions as providing a "blissful" ignorance to their believers. A lot of religions make people feel better; make them stop worrying about things they have no control over or provide answers to questions they can't answer.

blissful ignorance! That's the phrase I was trying to think of. Yeah, ignorance is bliss to an extent. Ha, glad you finally said it.

I don't like being ignorant, and truth and logic is what led me to Atheism in the first place. But returning to the state of "blissful ignorance" from time to time would be nice.
 
I wish I could believe in a god or higher power.... But I just can't.

good cause he not gonna do u any favours.
 

Lorraine Manca

Well-known member
What about this? Pick something that is both believable to you and inspiring. Like by imagining the entire universe or imagining looking down on the earth from the moon, anything that gives you the big picture or takes your breath away. You see daily life is by definition ordinary. So there isnt going to be much to draw on. There is a concept you can roughly call the sacred and the profane which characterize spiritual life. Most people think profane means something dirty, but that is not the original meaning of the word at all. It just means the ordinary. The part of life that doesnt have a religious dimension. The sacred is the extraordinary that is separate from the profane. When you have a hard time believing, it is because you are stuck in the profane. Turning your thoughts toward something that is both believable and extraordinary will plant the seeds of your spiritual life.
 

Acme

Well-known member
LoL, nor do I expect any....not from god, santa, the easter bunny, etc.


I don't know - Santa seems like a cool dude. Out of the 3 you mentioned, I think he would be the one who would help. Although the easter bunny did warn Donnie Darko (28:06:42:12).
 
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