CosmicNeurotica
Banned
Well, I looked up the symptoms:
* Has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements)
* Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
* Believes that he or she is "special" and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)
* Requires excessive admiration
* Has a sense of entitlement, i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations
* Is interpersonally exploitative, i.e., takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends
* Lacks empathy: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others
* Is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her
* Shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes.
I have to say. I see myself in that. But I'm still confused. I do want attention, but it's more of a cry for help. I'm desperate for help. But I thought. What would I do after I get help? I only care about myself! This is a sad realization. It's not that I don't care about others. I do. But it really is hard to empathize.
In public, I only care what I look like. Everyone else looks fine. I just want people to see ME. Be my friend.
And I used to try to hide the fact that I'm agoraphobic, and I'd pretend to be someone I'm not so people will like me. But maybe now I know why. No one wants to be around me because I'm a freaking narcissist!
This is really bugging me now.
Wow. I can't believe this is just coming to me. Here I've been trying to blame others, trying to find out what's wrong with me.
And even as a child, I enjoyed torturing creatures and burning things. Only recently (well the last few years) have I gotten over that and I would never hurt any animal now. I absolutely love nature.
But in the end, I've realized. Everything I post is about me! It has to be me.
Well, I just want to apologize to anyone and everyone who may have read something from me where they thought I was a jack ass.
Damnit. This is so strange for me because I've always had a hatred for douchebags. I wonder why they can't be more caring. And here I am the whole time being one!
This just doesn't make sense. This isn't me. I know I'm caring, but at the same time my stature matters. The way others perceive me matters.
Damnit.
How can I get help for this?
I feel like who I am is being hijacked by narcissism.
* Has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements)
* Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
* Believes that he or she is "special" and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)
* Requires excessive admiration
* Has a sense of entitlement, i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations
* Is interpersonally exploitative, i.e., takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends
* Lacks empathy: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others
* Is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her
* Shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes.
I have to say. I see myself in that. But I'm still confused. I do want attention, but it's more of a cry for help. I'm desperate for help. But I thought. What would I do after I get help? I only care about myself! This is a sad realization. It's not that I don't care about others. I do. But it really is hard to empathize.
In public, I only care what I look like. Everyone else looks fine. I just want people to see ME. Be my friend.
And I used to try to hide the fact that I'm agoraphobic, and I'd pretend to be someone I'm not so people will like me. But maybe now I know why. No one wants to be around me because I'm a freaking narcissist!
This is really bugging me now.
Wow. I can't believe this is just coming to me. Here I've been trying to blame others, trying to find out what's wrong with me.
And even as a child, I enjoyed torturing creatures and burning things. Only recently (well the last few years) have I gotten over that and I would never hurt any animal now. I absolutely love nature.
But in the end, I've realized. Everything I post is about me! It has to be me.
Well, I just want to apologize to anyone and everyone who may have read something from me where they thought I was a jack ass.
Damnit. This is so strange for me because I've always had a hatred for douchebags. I wonder why they can't be more caring. And here I am the whole time being one!
This just doesn't make sense. This isn't me. I know I'm caring, but at the same time my stature matters. The way others perceive me matters.
Damnit.
How can I get help for this?
I feel like who I am is being hijacked by narcissism.