I Love Her

yrf

yrf

Member
I am currently first year college student in Chicago. There is one girl in my English class. I am in love with that girl. I talked to her few times, not about how i feel about her, but just a general talks which we do with friends. I really love her. The only problem is she got a boyfriend in that same college. I do not know what i should do now. Should i tell her about how i feel or should i just forget about it.
 
Odo

Odo

Banned
If she isn't happy in her relationship, you might still have a chance... people get into relationships that they're not serious about all the time, or they get into relationships that make them feel empty, or that just aren't working for whatever reason.

I'm not saying you should make a move or anything but there's no harm in trying to get to know someone. It's not like they're married... but if it's a serious thing where she's really happy, then you probably don't have a hope in hell and I would leave it alone.

You also might not have a hope in hell just because she's not interested in you, but yeah... if you think she's worth it you can always get closer and try to find out more about the situation.
 
I

ImNotMyIllness

Well-known member
Been there, done that!! Try to focus you affection on someone single. It's easy to be in love when you don't have all the drama and you build that person up to a perfect standard.
 
NathanielWingatePeaslee

NathanielWingatePeaslee

Iä! Iä! Cthulhu fhtagn!
Staff member
yrf said:
I am currently first year college student in Chicago. There is one girl in my English class. I am in love with that girl. I talked to her few times, not about how i feel about her, but just a general talks which we do with friends. I really love her. The only problem is she got a boyfriend in that same college. I do not know what i should do now. Should i tell her about how i feel or should i just forget about it.
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No.

You've only talked to her a few times, and only casual conversation at that? You are not in love with her. You are infatuated. Since you can't possibly know her very well, it's likely a lot to do with her appearance.

Confusing those two is common, and no doubt what you are feeling is intense. If you were to tell her you love her, she would probably know it's not the truth, even if you don't.

If you're interested, you must get to know her--if both she and circumstances allow it. Don't pretend you're just trying to be her friend though, because that's not all you want. She will know that too.
 
S

Silatuyok

Well-known member
NathanielWingatePeaslee said:
No.

You've only talked to her a few times, and only casual conversation at that? You are not in love with her. You are infatuated. Since you can't possibly know her very well, it's likely a lot to do with her appearance.

Confusing those two is common, and no doubt what you are feeling is intense. If you were to tell her you love her, she would probably know it's not the truth, even if you don't.

If you're interested, you must get to know her--if both she and circumstances allow it. Don't pretend you're just trying to be her friend though, because that's not all you want. She will know that too.
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This. :thumbup:
 
Odo

Odo

Banned
Guess SPW doesn't believe in love at first sight.

You can tell a lot about a person by observing their style, demeanor and gestures. How someone carries themselves reveals so much about what kind of person they are. It probably reveals more than sitting together and talking about things that probably aren't even that important, not even because you want to but because that's what you think people are supposed to do.

Sometimes there's a spark and you just know. It doesn't always work out, but writing off someone's attraction as something unhealthy and giving them some horrible, condescending explanation of their own feelings is really rude. I'm pretty sure that the only time it's written off as infatuation is when the feelings aren't reciprocated... as if someone not loving you back means you're sick in the head.

And I reallly don't think you should be completely upfront... that would just make everyone uncomfortable. If it's meant to be, you won't NEED to explain yourself. But you should be able to let go and not let it wreck your life if it's not going anywhere.
 
Bronson99

Bronson99

Well-known member
ImNotMyIllness said:
Been there, done that!! Try to focus you affection on someone single. It's easy to be in love when you don't have all the drama and you build that person up to a perfect standard.
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Honestly in my experience, nobody ever is single these days, and in the unusual case that they are, they are then "not looking."

(Are you sure you're not just giving that "I'm not looking" explanation selectively, and probably most of the time??) :applause:
 
C

corranhorn

Well-known member
You are not in love. You see a pretty girl and your genetic code is telling you that if you procreate, it will ensure the survival of your DNA and your lineage. You are young and your emotions are interpreting this basic biological response as love. Do yourself a favor and avoid women. For now. Focus on school, get a career, and then worry about all that. Believe me. It will save you heartache.

Source: A man who has been betrayed severely by youthful "love". It cost me precious moments of my youth that I can never get back.
 
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