Holiday Blues

[findingbeauty]

I'm actually surprised l didn't see a thread like this when I logged on today. So, here it is. How are you coping with the holidays? What is your experience?

For me, l found myself feeling anxious, lonely, and depressed lately. l didn't know why-I just started questioning and fearing my life circumstances, feeling shy and embarrassed about myself and wanting to hide. I was talking to my SO about it when it occurred to me that it's the holidays that are bringing all this up in me.

People happy with friends and family, gift shopping,having fun. There is so much unspoken pressure to be happy and involved in activities. With my general anxiety and social anxiety disorders, deceased Mom, out-of-state dad,and low income, all of this is very difficult for me and stressful. I just want to hide and take cover until it is all over. It is an ugly reminder of my lack of friends, family, and finances. Feeling ''different" .

 

[MikeyC]

Seasonal Affective Disorder. It's SAD (pardon the pun).

I understand what you're going through, as those who are not as fortunate to spend the holidays with loved ones can feel a little left out in the euphoria. What are your plans for the holidays? If nothing, is there anything you can do?

I don't feel too bad this year. I don't like it but I feel better than I did last year. All this can change in a heartbeat, though.

 

[laure15]

I'm actually feeling the holiday spirit, even though I won't be visiting relatives or hanging out with friends on Christmas. Listening to too much holiday songs on the radio must have put me in the mood (my mom keeps the radio on all day). I expect to learn new things and continue writing stories during winter break.

 

[1BlackSheep]

I've had absolutely zero Christmas spirit this year, and have actually been in a really horrible mood. Today I got together with a long-time friend who I hadn't seen in while for shopping at a new outlet mall in our area and lunch. It did actually lift my spirits some. I'll probably go back to feeling like sh** tomorrow though! ::

 

[Phoenixx]

It really doesn't feel like Christmas this year for me. Which is pretty awful considering I absolutely love this time of year and am usually as happy and excited as if I were 5 again. I partially blame not having snow. Snow always puts me in a festive mood.

Maybe within the next few days my spirits will lift.

 

[1BlackSheep]

It really doesn't feel like Christmas this year for me. Which is pretty awful considering I absolutely love this time of year and am usually as happy and excited as if I were 5 again. I partially blame not having snow. Snow always puts me in a festive mood.

Maybe within the next few days my spirits will lift.

Yea, for some reason it doesn't feel like Christmas at all. I can't blame it on no snow though!

 

[LazyHermitCrab]

There is no snow here. I want it to snow verrrrry much

 

[findingbeauty]

I had such a horrible childhood I have very few positive memories of Christmas.

On a positive note, I had photocards done for the first time ever this year. l was feeling a bit dreadful about it -haven't even sent regular holiday cards in years, but when l sat down to prepared them for sending and pick out who they would go to, I found it rather fun, and therapeutic. It felt nice to think of people and send them a little greeting and in a way appreciate them.

MikeyC, l will be with my boyfriend's family this year. They are very nice, but I don't have a very deep or close connectionwith them. I'm feeling more hopeful that l will rise to the occasion now though. Thanks for asking. Btw, isn't SAD sunlight exposure related? I don't think I'm overly deprived of contact with the sun...

 

[MikeyC]

MikeyC, l will be with my boyfriend's family this year. They are very nice, but I don't have a very deep or close connectionwith them. I'm feeling more hopeful that l will rise to the occasion now though. Thanks for asking. Btw, isn't SAD sunlight exposure related? I don't think I'm overly deprived of contact with the sun...

Hopefully the frayed connections with your boyfriend's family can be strengthened this year. Good luck with that.

I thought it was just because of the season and sunlight was only one part of the problem. I could be wrong, though (probably wrong).

 

[gustavofring]

I don't really care about Christmas. Sounds a little sad, but I think I'll just ignore it completely this year. Not that I'm anti-christmas or anything, I liked it when I was young, but my sister and brother, only family I still have didn't care to invite me and they're not really christmas-spirited people themselves anyway. You can tell they're not into it and it's a bit forced.

I just hope nobody will "discover" me being alone, that's about the only thing I worry about, because there's such a conditioned stigma on being alone with christmas. I don't find it such a big deal, as long as it's not every year. I'll amuse myself anyway.

 

[razzle dazzle rose]

It is a tough time for me too. I am trying to make the best of it though and have some plans. I am testing out some new recipes - hope I don't burn anything :s I bought gifts and sent out Christmas cards. Want to start some traditions. Like creating a signature dish. I don't want to let the bad experiences from the past ruin this holiday.

 

[Bert_Stair]

thanksgiving? christmas? new year's eve? it's just another day for my lonely/wandering mind.