Have you ever felt like you dont deserve something

[vj288]

Non-romantically, I have this feeling all the time about almost everything. Or more that other people deserve them more, and that by me taking them or by something good happening to me it means it won't happen to someone else, someone who deserves it more than me. I don't view myself as a good person, and I hate it when good things happen to me. A part of me sincerely wants bad things to happen to me, dark I know but it's just how I feel. It makes me hate applying for jobs, I always feel like I'm stealing it from someone who deserves it, and would do a better job and put the money to better use.

Romantically speaking though, I'll be more likely to think "she deserves better than me" than "I don't deserve to be with her." But I don't date or plan on doing so anytime soon so these feelings are more theoretical than in practice.

 

[schist]

No, because that's loser talk.

 

[MrJones]

I don't do any good, so I don't deserve anything good happening to me. I feel so awkward when it happens I don't know how to react. There is someone who deserves what I have much more than I do.

 

[BlackPuma]

Yes and no. Materials and objects I have no problem accepting. Then again, most things I have are things that I've either worked hard for or others simply wanted to throw away.

With friends/love however, I never really think their affection towards me is quite rational. I always feel like I don't deserve their attention, that I'm leading them on. I mean, I like me because I experience my personal emotions, but I can't see how someone that isn't directly linked to my brain/thoughts possibly could.


I guess that explains why I have way more stuff then friends. :c

 

[gazelle]

Yes, I used to (and still can)feel like that romantically because of being shy and not being able to easily communicate with others,hence seeing such a quality in someone else can make that person an idol in my eyes and it's quite wrong.

 

[OceanMist]

I don't do any good, so I don't deserve anything good happening to me. I feel so awkward when it happens I don't know how to react. There is someone who deserves what I have much more than I do.

I've seen you do good on these forums. I believe you help people feel better on here. That's doing good.

 

[treegirl]

I've felt this way most of my adult life, but since being ill i feel differently.

 

[Sacrament]

I'm a believer that you deserve whatever you tell yourself you deserve and work for. Now crossing the bridge between believing that and acting upon it, is a different thing.

 

[FriendlyShadow]

For me, it's a little different. I wouldn't want to be in any kind of relationship (especially now) for other reasons. I think, personally, it will only add on to the drama in my life I have to deal with despite my own family's. I can only imagine how much stress I'll be going through with having somebody else I need to think of and give my own time up on. I'm not a very committed person. I'm not somone who flirts with everyone they see. Plus, I do have some limitations when it comes to finding someone. I'm trying to see if there may be a way I can approach someone that I'm interested in getting to know. And that way, I will make the descision for myself if this is the kind of person I can see myself with. If not, then there's just no attraction/connection.

 

[grapevine]

Im actually feeling the opposite of this. Im in a relationship where I am giving too much (but only because I enjoy it)- but its feeling very unbalanced.

But I do understand what you mean. It goes back to how you feel about yourself. You cannot love someone else whole heartedly - you cannot accept their affection until you accept your own for yourself- so its quite hard. But you can have the right people that can make you feel like forcing yourself to love and accept you for you and that can feel amaxing and make you grow.

I think in relationships - there is a big element of trust - where you have to let yourself go too.

 

[THeCARS1979]

Yes I thought that before

 

[fate12321]

Yeah, OP basically described how I feel with everything I have. I don't feel like I deserve it.