i dont know y, but am 29 and never had any girls shown interest in me, they just dont want to know me, tried talking to them but they dont want to talk to me for some odd reason that i dont know, i been invited to a party i went to last time, with so many girls but i hated it cause no girl wanted to talk to me there, i dont really want to go but my friends say i should go. i dont want to go there again, and fell like a loser where everybody else is having fun.
girls just hate me
- Thread starter elm
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da_illest101
Well-known member
well there must be something wrong with you with either your look, presentation or way you act. you should ask your friends if there something about you that would make girls not being interested in you.
also, in most cases, girls that are usually like that are the type to be avoid
also, in most cases, girls that are usually like that are the type to be avoid
KiaKaha
Banned
Well seeing as you are a registered user on this site, pretty much means that you lack confidence/social skills/self esteem etc, which to many women is a BIG turn off. They can smell it a mile away, its like an inbuilt 6th sense... and if your only average looking thats going to make it even harder to win them over... its been proven that people sum you up within the first few seconds of meeting you.
You are probably quite sensitive too....perhaps overly polite and considerate? Big no no.... Women tend to like guys that are quite caring, but also strong and manly.
The reason I say this, is due to my own meandering experience with women, I have tried being the nice guy and it doesnt seem to work. They may be attracted to you for a while but after realizing that you actually care about them they seem to scamper...
Anyway, I know I have made some massive generalizations and my bitterness is showing, and that its not the case for all women, but its hard to see things other than that when it seem so blatantly obvious that thats what it is.
I have found humour often works with women. If you can make a girl laugh,then its psychologically impossible for her not to like you. Might be worth starting there... maybe.
You are probably quite sensitive too....perhaps overly polite and considerate? Big no no.... Women tend to like guys that are quite caring, but also strong and manly.
The reason I say this, is due to my own meandering experience with women, I have tried being the nice guy and it doesnt seem to work. They may be attracted to you for a while but after realizing that you actually care about them they seem to scamper...
Anyway, I know I have made some massive generalizations and my bitterness is showing, and that its not the case for all women, but its hard to see things other than that when it seem so blatantly obvious that thats what it is.
I have found humour often works with women. If you can make a girl laugh,then its psychologically impossible for her not to like you. Might be worth starting there... maybe.
iamthenra
Well-known member
Elm, you are not alone. I too feel the same way. I'm 41 soon to be 42, and every time I get talked into going to a party, I am always the only one that is alone, seriously the only one standing there by myself while everyone else is talking to someone. It isn't much fun, even when another guy comes around to chat for a few seconds even he leaves in a few minutes, people sense the uneasy feeling that I must be transmitting to others... I'm doomed.
Tiercel
Well-known member
I wish I knew what to tell you, elm, but every girl I've ever developed a liking of I've sent scurrying away. And they all usually avoid me like the plague, too. There was really only one girl in 11th grade that I thought might kinda like me. But she reminded me too much of myself, and sent me running at the time.
I guess the whole social anxiety thing really has me screwed. Too bad it's not a nice girl.
I guess the whole social anxiety thing really has me screwed. Too bad it's not a nice girl.
Tiercel
Well-known member
Too bad you're only like wolves and not actually wolves. I'm much more awesome when dealing with canine mentalities. Plus, wolves are always sexy as hell. And I can't in good faith say that about humans.
Walk
Well-known member
You're actually 100% on the dime, man.
You can't be too nice with women. You have to gauge it. And yes, guys good with women will usually make them laugh. That is the "pre-foreplay foreplay".
Oscar Wilde said something like (too lazy to search for the actual quote, so forgive me): "you can't expect a woman to like a man who treats her like a human being".
ROFL
But aside from the joking, I think it is true that women like a man who can make them FEEL strong emotions, whether it be what we call "good" emotions like laughter and the pleasure from compliments, and also what we call as "not so good" emotions like making them feel some sort of mild emotional pain such as a little jealousy, anger, etc.
yes am ugly, and yes girls hate me cause am so ugly, but i have seen so many i mean too many ugly guys even uglier then me going out with really really sexy girls, but i always get so burned deep inside that y not me, i went to a party last time and saw really ugly guys, u werent even wearing good clothes and not good looking still there were being hit by nice sexy girls, but i was the one in the corner standing like a d*****k , with no girl. i just hate my life sometime, i wish i shouldnt have been born.
KiaKaha
Banned
Let loose Pookah...succumb to the desire.... I am dying to know personally....
KiaKaha
Banned
Thats no way to talk about yourself man. There are plenty of people out there who will put you down and think your a piece of crap, you dont need to do it to yourself too. Maybe thats part of the problem... I mean if they can sense that they dont like yourself, then why would they like you? I feel a little hypocritical dispensing advice like this, because I have trouble with self acceptance also, its easy to realize but difficult to actually do it... but I have seen it time and time again, its all about confidence... maybe once in a while you may meet someone who is a little more sympathetic, but its rare...and only then will they take so much...
I actually think relationships and finding a partner has some deep biological and anthropological aspects to it. All is not what it seems
Tiercel
Well-known member
Good woman, hold thy tongue! Let fly thy nails!
Please forgive the poor attempt at Shakespearian wording. One may lose restraint without wagging one's tongue. Especially on the internet.
Unless you really are a wolf, in which case you probably don't have fingers to type with....
Pookah
Well-known member
This is the point I am trying to make with my jokes. Women aren't animals. Certainly we differ from males in ways but trying to apply these formulas to us...why?
Is there a formula for men? What should I endeavor to be? Forward he might think I'm easy which I am not. Reserved he might think I am a cold bitch. (It depends on the type of guy as well.) Some women don't know what to do either. I never know what a man's intentions are or what he would expect of me.
This dance of socializing people do...it is little more than adherence to perceived patterns of acceptable and charming interaction. Do you look at those giggling female creatures and desire them? Are you looking for a girl or a woman? Casual or serious?
I think you need to meet people more organically. Interact with your friends, break into conversation when it is familiar and you find you have something to say. Give other people a chance to observe you as you are before you try to talk one on one.
Social anxiety makes things exponentially more difficult and "normal" people don't have it completely figured out either.
When I say I have to restrain myself, it is to comment on the generalizations of women. I believe you need to look at yourself as well as the opposite sex. Are the types of females you are interested in "appropriate." Are you only thinking of how they can make you feel or are you trying to find a partner?
I don't believe that women somehow don't like polite men, btw. There wouldn't be so many Jane Austen fans if this were true. Courtly love is not dead.
There are so many facets and conditions that may alter the circumstances and outcomes of interpersonal relations. Yet we try to simplify it to suit every individual when it realistically won't suit everyone.
Excuse my ranting, I can't be coherent at 3:30am.
Is there a formula for men? What should I endeavor to be? Forward he might think I'm easy which I am not. Reserved he might think I am a cold bitch. (It depends on the type of guy as well.) Some women don't know what to do either. I never know what a man's intentions are or what he would expect of me.
This dance of socializing people do...it is little more than adherence to perceived patterns of acceptable and charming interaction. Do you look at those giggling female creatures and desire them? Are you looking for a girl or a woman? Casual or serious?
I think you need to meet people more organically. Interact with your friends, break into conversation when it is familiar and you find you have something to say. Give other people a chance to observe you as you are before you try to talk one on one.
Social anxiety makes things exponentially more difficult and "normal" people don't have it completely figured out either.
When I say I have to restrain myself, it is to comment on the generalizations of women. I believe you need to look at yourself as well as the opposite sex. Are the types of females you are interested in "appropriate." Are you only thinking of how they can make you feel or are you trying to find a partner?
I don't believe that women somehow don't like polite men, btw. There wouldn't be so many Jane Austen fans if this were true. Courtly love is not dead.
There are so many facets and conditions that may alter the circumstances and outcomes of interpersonal relations. Yet we try to simplify it to suit every individual when it realistically won't suit everyone.
Excuse my ranting, I can't be coherent at 3:30am.
BlueDays
1
Hands up any other females in SPW who are sick and tired of reading threads like this that tell other guys what girls "like" and "Don't like"!?
It would not be so infuriating to read if so much of it wasn't so damn negative and tinged with an obvious seething judgemental tone.
I know it is difficult when you have only had bad experiences with girls to go on. Hopefully age willl help you to understand that humans, yes girls are human too, are very complex. Attaching just one type of "set of rules" so to speak to apply to girls, is not going to be as helpful as you think.
Some of the experiences with girls that have been mentioned in this thread where the girl had "scampered" away, may be an indication that they have been put off by your negative attitude towards what girls want.
Do you really believe that a girl would be attracted to a guy that makes her feel "not so good" emotions like "jealousy" and "anger"!?.....really????? Do you realize how frustrating that is to read for girls who know how nonsensical that statement is.
It would not be so infuriating to read if so much of it wasn't so damn negative and tinged with an obvious seething judgemental tone.
I know it is difficult when you have only had bad experiences with girls to go on. Hopefully age willl help you to understand that humans, yes girls are human too, are very complex. Attaching just one type of "set of rules" so to speak to apply to girls, is not going to be as helpful as you think.
Some of the experiences with girls that have been mentioned in this thread where the girl had "scampered" away, may be an indication that they have been put off by your negative attitude towards what girls want.
Do you really believe that a girl would be attracted to a guy that makes her feel "not so good" emotions like "jealousy" and "anger"!?.....really????? Do you realize how frustrating that is to read for girls who know how nonsensical that statement is.
KiaKaha
Banned
Perhaps misundestanding the opposite sex is simply a symptom of being a different gender...
I think men sub consciously believe that women have all the power when it comes to dating. Maybe that is not true. It can be confusing for both sides... both genders trying to live up to an expectation that the other will percieve as being desirable....and constantly getting it wrong...and yeah..it bites.
Anyway, I am going off on a tangent... to the OP I hope things work out for you
I think men sub consciously believe that women have all the power when it comes to dating. Maybe that is not true. It can be confusing for both sides... both genders trying to live up to an expectation that the other will percieve as being desirable....and constantly getting it wrong...and yeah..it bites.
Anyway, I am going off on a tangent... to the OP I hope things work out for you
Ignace
Well-known member
I wish I knew what to tell you, elm, but every girl I've ever developed a liking of I've sent scurrying away. And they all usually avoid me like the plague, too. There was really only one girl in 11th grade that I thought might kinda like me. But she reminded me too much of myself, and sent me running at the time.
I guess the whole social anxiety thing really has me screwed. Too bad it's not a nice girl.
Agreeeee !! xD
BlueDays
1
Yes, MandyMouse, yes. Let go your anger.
And I really need to stop with the Star Wars references. It's getting to just be embarrassing.
lmao!!
No please don't stop making your Star Wars references Tiercel!! As a former Star Wars fan I really enjoy reading them!lol::- Status