I agree with you to a certain extent. I don't think it would be too far to have wanton sex either but she has to be ready and comfortable with the decision to have sex in the first place. Also, if it is her first time I would not advise to just let herself go. I wasn't the type to get really emotional or scared when I first had sex but that doesn't mean that she won't be dejected about having sex later on. I never cried or lamented the fact that I decided to have sex. I basically thought, "finally, I'm getting it over with" and at that point I was having too much fun to cry over a broken hymen. I'm not sentimental when it comes to sex. I leave sentiment for things that actually matter. Things like actual love.
Honestly, I think that the sex only with love belief is just a way to justify having sex so it won't have to be "dirty" or "sinful". All this shit comes from centuries of Judeo-Christian indoctrination. They seriously want people to believe that Mary concieved when she was a virgin? Otherwise she would be just another "whore" who gave in to wanton lust, right? Please!
I remember something that happend on a class trip years ago. A classmate came to me (she was plastered) and asked me whether she should have sex with this boy who had been trying to get into her pants all night. I asked her whether she had ever had sex before and she told me that she was in fact a virgin. I told her to wait. I'm not puritan either but I know how some womena and men are when it comes to virginity so I wasn't going to tell her to do something which she might later on regret. She was a sweet girl too so I didn't think it was right to tell her to loose her virginity while she was piss-drunk. I wonder if she's thanking me or if she doesn't even care or remember? lol
Great post. I agree with you 100%. I feel that as long as you're comfortable with having sex, why not do it? People think that sex should be with someone you're deeply in love with or you should wait until marriage to have sex. I think the latter is ridiculous. Why marry someone you've never been intimate with?
I think sex is just that - sex. Don't be easy and loose about it, but have fun. As long as you're comfortable and happy and safe with it. There's nothing wrong with being intimate with someone you don't plan on spending forever with. But that's just my opinion. There are boundaries, yes. And people should set them.
As for the original poster, I think you're being smart about this. Making out on the first date isn't a bad thing, and I certainly don't think it made you look easy. Just be upfront with him about your feelings and if he wants to go further, make sure you tell him the truth. He may understand or he may not. And if he doesn't, he isn't worth your time, anyway. I'm sure you already knew that, though.
P.S. I'm still a virgin, if anyone was wondering.
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